Ill Met in Nerima
by The Altered Destinies
Summary: Who wants to live forever? That's what Leona Dubois, apprenticed Immortal, wants to know when she follows her Mentor to Nerima...but when Erin O'Shea (Iceni Immortal) introduces her to some "old friends" from the prefecture, things really start to happen as Leona gets involved with the Ranma cast and their relationship problems, and that doesn't even include the evil Immortal who i
1. Chapter 1

Ill Met in Nerima

(A Ranma/Highlander Crossover)

by Jim Robert Bader

(Based on the works of Rumiko Takahashi and the concepts of the Highlander Series;  
The following is a work of Fanfiction And should not be construed as Copyright violation)

Part One.

"[Nerima?]"

"[Aye, me luv,]" said the very tall ice blond woman to her dark haired companion as they rode the bullet train together, "[A very old friend O' mine lives in a Temple near th outskirts O' town and I was thinking O' droppin' in for a visit, see how he's doin' an' such. Thought it'd be a good place to stay overnight before I take ye sightseein' O' Tokyo itself. All part O' yer continuin' education.]"

Leona Dubious pouted slightly as she considered that statement. For her companion, Erin O'Shea, the term "Old Friend" usually meant someone older than Methuselah, usually another Immortal.

"[By th' way, luv,]" Erin continued, "[Ye haven't said much since we left Kyoto a while back. Are ye enjoyin' the trip so far?]"

"[Huh?]" Leona reacted, "[Oh, uh, yeah...sure, no problem.]"

Erin eyed her companion slowly, then allowed herself to lean back in her seat as she seemed to gaze off into infinity, her Celtic voice invoking the poetry of the Bards as she reflected once more on a chapter of her life with a clarity that made it sounds as though it were a few years rather than decades (or centuries) to the time upon which she reflected.

"[Oh aye, Japan has changed much from the time O' the occupation. Been here off an' on a bit since they opened the place up to the West. Lots O' good friends I've known in me time, most gone now, sadly, but the memories linger.]"

Leona rolled her eyes. This part of her mentor she was all too aware of, the fact that Erin strode down through the corridors of time with blithe disregard for the passage of the centuries, and she was trying to make Leona grasp this fact as it might one day apply to her also. Two years since discovering the little secret of her origins had not made it any easier for Leona to accept the fact that one day she too would outlive almost everyone she encountered. Compared to her and Erin the rest of the people on this train were ghosts. Once here and soon forgotten.

Well, not totally forgotten. One of the annoying facets of Immortality, she had discovered, was eidetic memory. Immortals never forgot anything, could not forget a name or face, would never know senility and would always be able to instantly recollect in detail anything that they witnessed. It was a big help around test time but it also meant that you could remember stuff you would rather not remember...

"[By the way, luv,]" Erin noted slyly, "[Think it's best if we work on your language skills from here on out. After all, you need to brush up on your Japanese a bit if you don't want to sound like a tourist.]"

"[I am a tourist,]" Leona said in annoyance but relented as she added, "[Japanese is a hard language. I keep messing it up with the tenses...]"

"[Yer no worse than I was when I first visited Nippon,]" Erin noted, "[Before Ieyasu Tokugawa an' his heirs closed the place off for tourism.]" So saying she shifted to Japanese and said, "Besides, it gets better with practice, and you'll remember the details of nuance the more you hear it spoken."

"Maybe so," Leona replied in badly accented Japanese, "Me no can stand be treated as stupid. Why it so hard every time I got learn new language? No people here speak English?"

"Actually, quite a few people do," Erin noted, "They teach language skills in High School to anyone who cares to stay awake in class. That's not the point though, you're here to learn how to move about freely among mortals like you were one of them. It's always more polite to speak the language of the people you visit rather than expect them to accommodate you, and more practical besides. You never know, some day you might even visit here on a regular basis."

"Yeah, right," Leona snorted just as they felt the train slow down as it approached the next station.

Erin got up and urged Leona to follow as they retrieved their belongings from the overhead rack. Erin clutched her ever-present walking cane in one hand and headed for the exit, Leona being shoved and bumped from all sides as she tried to wade through a sea of people, mindful that her own dark hair fit in with this crowd far better than the pale apparition who boldly strode through the mass before her.

Not long after this they were in a cab heading for an address Erin gave the driver, passing through a part of town that looked ordinary enough, just like any other big city suburb, except for the signs that were all in Japanese symbols. Leona could not make heads or tails of these up-and-down characters...kanji Erin called it, but she did know a restaurant when she saw one and felt a rumbling in her stomach. She looked hopefully at her mentor and saw Erin smile but shake her head in denial.

"We can eat when we get to the temple," Erin replied, "Holy ground's the best place for enjoying a meal."

"I no think can wait that long," Leona groaned, her stomach adding its own voice on the matter.

"You won't die from hunger, my love," Erin said indulgently, but she cast a furtive glance out the window and smiled before saying, "On second though, maybe it won't hurt to have you sample some of the local cuisine. Driver, stop here. If I guess right we're about to meet another old friend of mine, and this time he's a mortal. Should be safe enough for a bit."

"[This doesn't have anything to do with octopus or squid does it?]" Leona asked with great suspicion.

"Calimari?" Erin replied with a wide grin hinting at mischief, "Not a bad idea, but not this time. No, you're about to sample one of the great cultural delicacies of Japan. It's called okonomiyaki, the local equivalent of pizza."

Leona's eyes widened and then she grinned back for the first time since Kyoto.

Erin went in first, as usual, making waves by her very presence as there were not too many Japanese men who were as tall as she was, over six feet and highly athletic. She scanned the place with a sweeping glance before her attention became riveted on the chef behind the main counter. Leona followed her gaze and saw a young girl close to her own age with long brown hair held over her back by a large white ribbon. As they approached she saw the girl look up in surprise, followed shortly by recognition.

"Can I help-Erin?"

"Kuonji Ukyo," Erin replied as she came up to the main counter, "I thought I might see you when I read the your sign. Ucchan was the nickname your father always used to use for you. Is he around some place?"

"Not around here," the girl replied, looking Erin up and down as though unable to believe that she was real, "Wow, you haven't changed a bit! If anything you're prettier than I remember."

"The same might be said about you," Erin replied in a fond way that made Leona bristle slightly, "Only you have changed, and grown at least half a meter. The little girl playing at being a boy has turned into a fine strapping young woman. I'll bet you have to beat them off with a club."

"More like a spatula," the girl grinned, then took notice of Leona and said, "Who's your friend?"

"My student," Erin replied as she indicated Leona, "Dubois, Leona, late of Kansas City in the States. I've been taking her on a tour to see the world, and we just happened to be cruising by your place. Leona, this is the daughter of a friend of mine from about ten years back. Her name is Kuonji Ukyo, otherwise known by a few as Ucchan."

Leona frowned as she automatically remembered that that the Japanese placed their family names before their personal names, so this girl was actually Ukyo Kuonji, who she now thought looked even younger than she was (actually that was difficult to tell since Leona looked pretty much the same as she did when she was Quickened two years ago, but inside she still felt...older). She was somewhat relieved to learn that this Ukyo had been a child when Erin had last seen her, which eliminated the possibility of her being an old girlfriend, and she certainly was no Immortal. She was actually quite pretty, if somewhat masculine in her choice of dress, and her expression was certainly friendly enough. Leona began to relax somewhat as she took a seat beside Erin facing Ukyo across the counter.

"What'll it be for you and your friend?" Ukyo asked as she held up a pair of spatulas as though preparing to conduct an orchestra performance.

"Two house specials," Erin replied, "It's Leona's first time."

"In that case I'll give her one of my super-duper specials," Ukyo grinned, and then she went into action with her spatulas becoming almost invisible. Leona's eyes widened as a disk-shaped cooked wafer topped by sauces and condiments landed on her plate as if by magic. Another just like it landed on Erin's plate a half-second later.

"Splendid!" Erin complimented, "Your technique's vastly improved. I doubt your father himself could match your speed and skill, Ucchan. He must be very proud of you."

"Yeah, well..." Ukyo glanced away, "We really don't talk much these days. He helped me get this restaurant going but I run the place by myself for the most part."

Leona wondered if she were hearing things right, or why Erin was being so casual as she picked up the hot food and began eating. In curiosity Leona asked, "How old are you?"

"Old enough," Ukyo smiled, "Which means seventeen going on eighteen next month. How about yourself?"

"Ah?" Leona blinked in reply. This girl was almost exactly the same age as she was when she quickened, yet there was something about her eyes that seemed to imply a maturity beyond her years. Leona knew the feeling well enough, it was in her own reflection the last time she had looked into a mirror.

"Leona's Nineteen," Erin answered, "Graduated just last year. I used to be her teacher, but now we travel the world together as I'm sort of her legal guardian and I wanted to show her a proper education."

Leona almost choked on that. Erin's idea of a "proper education" was going from one hair-raising adventure after another, and some of the things they had survived together would have given Indiana Jones nightmares! As she thought on this she picked up her okonomiyaki and blew on it a bit before bringing it up to her mouth and taking a sample bite.

She reacted in complete surprise as the flavor hit her tongue like a mallet. She straightened up on her seat and declared, "It's good!" with much enthusiasm. She saw Ukyo flash a smile as if that were the response she had expected.

"Couldn't agree with you more, Leona-chan," Erin replied as she finished off her okonomiyaki in a few quick bites then licked her fingers, "Excellent indeed! Light and crispy on the outside but evenly cooked on the inside. On the whole I'd have to declare it the best okonomiyaki that I've ever tasted."

"And why not?" Ukyo asked as though she were about to give a trademark statement, "I make the best okonomiyaki in Japan, perhaps even the world!"

"No argument there," Erin smiled, giving the girl another lookover before adding, "And what about your personal life, Ucchan? Stopped dressing like a boy, I see. You ever catch up with that boy you were always talking about, the one who skipped out with his father and stole your Yatai?"

"As a matter of fact I..." Ukyo started to say when she caught sight of a young man entering the restaurant and smiled the more broadly, "There he is now! Hey, Ranchan!"

"Ucchan," the boy waved back as he approached, but as he did so Leona felt a momentary reaction and gave the guy a second study.

He appeared to be an ordinary Japanese boy the same age as Ukyo, and not very tall either, perhaps a few inches under six feet. He had black hair that was done up into a pig tail leading down his back but had blue eyes instead of the usual dark brown or black of most Japanese that she had encountered. He wore a red Chinese style outfit with wooden pegs in place of buttons and black pants with a pair of slippers for footwear. All of these things Leona knew at a glance, but there was something more about him... something she felt at his approach that made her really sit up and take notice.

It was a feeling similar to the one she always felt when approached by another Immortal, only very different in some way, as though he contained a power like the Quickening but was not quite the same as her or Erin. He also moved too casually with a glide to his movements that implied an easy control of his power. She knew that implied that he had training as a fighter, but what disturbed her most was that his movements were incredibly similar to those used by Erin.

The boy was looking at her with an equally casual glance that contained no malice or hostility but implied curiosity before his gaze moved on to Erin and he took full stock of the larger platinum-blond woman. Only after he'd finished a visual inspection did his gaze turn back towards Ukyo as he smiled at her in an easygoing manner.

"Your usual, Ranchan?" the girl asked, and Leona could have sworn that her Japanese was either shakier than she imagined or that she thought she could detect a note of hopefulness and longing in her voice as her eyes shone with emotion.

"Sure thing," the boy said, but not in any way that would have suggested a return of the same feelings.

"Coming right up," Ukyo replied, and like a flash she produced another okonomiyaki, which same she tossed onto the boy's plate with perfect precision.

Leona watched in amazement then played the whole thing back in her mind, all the more astounded at the speed Ukyo displayed, which Benny Hannah would have envied. Even seeing it again it left her feeling like she needed a stop-motion camera.

The boy gobbled the pizza down in record time then said, "Thanks, Ucchan, as usual you're a lifesaver."

"Akane tried cooking dinner again?" Ukyo asked as if she already knew the answer to the question.

Ranma winced, "Why can't she ever just give it a rest? She tries too hard, but when I tell her that all she does is hit me..."

"So you're Ucchan's long-lost fianc e?" Erin suddenly intruded on their conversation, a sly look in her eyes.

"Uh...yeah," the boy finally turned to her, "You guys know Ucchan?"

"I'm an old friend of the family," Erin replied, standing up to bow towards him, "Erin O'Shea, and this is my friend Leona Dubious, and yourself?"

"Saotome Ranma," he slid off his chair and bowed to them with wary caution, then saw the surprised look in Erin's eye and frowned by just a fraction.

"Saotome?" she inclined her head, "You wouldn't happen to know a Saotome Genma, would you?"

"He's my father," Ranma admitted warily, "What's he done this time? Does he owe you money? You're not by any chance another long-lost fianc e?"

"Goodness no," Erin grinned, "You're much too young for me, but Leona here's another matter."

"Hey!" Leona protested even though she knew that Erin was only kidding. She hoped.

"But," Erin continued, "I do know your father, or did quite a few years ago. You don't look much like he did when he was your age."

"I get that a lot," Ranma shrugged, "I'm told I look more like my mother..." then he stopped as he registered what she was saying, "My age? But you...?"

"Don't judge by appearances," Erin grinned, "I'm older than I look."

"Oh," surprisingly enough the boy seemed to take this in stride and sat back down on his bench, "Sorry if I overreacted. You can never be too careful these days..."

"Erin, stop teasing Ranchan," Ukyo said as she turned back to the Ranma, "She's a terrible flirt, but she means well. Don't mind her teasing, she's mostly harmless."

"I wouldn't say that," Erin chuckled, "Besides which it's obvious enough that Ucchan has her eye on you, and I'm not that much of a cradle robber."

Except around me, Leona thought to herself, but then she noticed once again the strange looks the boy and girl were giving off, the girl's expression easily interpreted as longing and devotion while the boy looked both guilty and furtive. She was about to say something about that when a new voice intruded on the matter, a very angry voice that declared, "I thought I'd find you here flirting!"

Ranma flinched away with a guilty start and turned to the door to gasp, "Akane?"

A shorthaired Japanese girl in a yellow floral dress was standing in the doorway glaring angrily at Ranma as she declared in a hurt voice, "I go to all the trouble of preparing you a meal and this is the thanks I get? You run to her while the dinner I made goes to waste? How could you?"

"Ah, Akane," Ranma got hastily out of his seat and raised his hands in a deflecting motion, "You know it's not like that, I..."

"That you refuse to eat my cooking..." the girl in the yellow dress looked halfway between outrage and tears as she angrily stalked nearer to the wary Ranma, "After all the work I put into finally making you something good to eat and you won't even touch it...no! You come running to HER to eat her pig slop!"

"HEY!" Ukyo cried out in protest.

"Leave Ucchan out of this," the boy stood up, "It's not her fault that you're food's toxic and you can't even boil water without..." his eyes suddenly got very wide, as if only just realized what he was saying, and he hastily raised his hands in a deflecting manner, "I mean...I'm sorry, Akane! I didn't mean to..."

The girl was almost shaking with rage as she strode up to him and cried, "RANMA NO BAKA!" and then hit him so hard that he was picked up and thrown all the way across the room as patrons scattered, a few seconds too late to avoid him landing and toppling one of their tables.

"Hey!" Ukyo was suddenly vaulting the counter with a large baker's peal in hand as she snarled at Akane, "I TOLD YOU NOT TO DO THAT IN MY RESTAURANT!"

"Oh sure," the girl whirled and assumed a defensive stance, "Take his side like you always do! I know what you two say about me behind my back! Well, he's MY fianc e, and WE'RE getting married next month in case YOU don't remember!"

"How could I forget?" Ukyo was literally shaking with her own suppressed rage, standing less than a meter away from the other girl with her weapon half-raised as though she were aching to strike her, "You rub my nose in the fact every time we meet, but I'll say it again: DON'T HIT RANCHAN IN MY RESTAURANT!"

"I'm not afraid of you," Akane said defiantly, "And I'll tell you again to keep away from my iinazuke!"

"He's only your iinazuke because of that stupid agreement with your parents!" Ukyo was almost shouting, "My father betrothed me to him ten years before he even knew about you! By rights he should be mine instead of a violent girl like you who can't control her temper and can't cook to save her life! Now get out of here before I call the cops and have you dragged away!"

"Just try it," Akane glared at her, looking past Ukyo's shoulder before adding, "Ranma, we're leaving."

The boy had managed to shake off the mighty punch that he had taken but he was holding his head and weaving on his feet. Erin looked him over then took a step forward before saying, "Just a moment there, laddie, looks to me like you may have a mild concussion..."

"Uh, no, I'll be all right," Ranma replied, "I've been hurt a lot worse, but there's no need to see a doctor..."

"I am a doctor," Erin replied, "And I say you shouldn't take chances with your health," she looked meaningfully at Akane.

"And who," Akane pronounced the words like a challenge, "Are you?"

"Merely a concerned bystander," Erin bowed as she said, "You know that brawling in public is not very becoming. It tends to attract the wrong sort of attention."

"I'll thank you to keep your nose out of it," Akane said in a way that raised Leona's hackles, "Come on, Ranma, we're leaving."

Leona shot a furtive glance at Erin, wondering if her mentor would take out the younger girl for speaking to her in such a manner, and she could almost have pitied the other girl if this Akane person had not come across as sounding so vindictive. To her surprise Erin did nothing but watch as the boy with the pigtail followed dutifully after the shorter dark-haired girl as they both left the restaurant. Another second later as Ukyo leaned against her baker's peel, looking incredibly tired as though she had aged a year in the last five minutes.

"Damn her," the brown haired girl ever-so-softly whispered.

"Who that?" Leona asked, silently cursing her imperfect understanding of the language.

"That," Ukyo almost spat the word before her tone became one of futility, "Is my worst nightmare, Tendo Akane, Ranchan's other iinazuke."

"Say what?" Leona reacted, "But I thought...?"

"You have a rival with a better claim, Ucchan?" Erin asked, sounding both worried and puzzled, "Excuse my ignorance, I have been away a few years, but I wasn't aware the laws had changed to allow that."

"It's not like that," Ukyo straightened up, slinging her giant spatula over her back with a very weary look about her, "It's kind of a long and painful story. Let's just say Ranma's idiot father made a pact with Tendo Soun to have his son marry one of the Tendo daughters and Akane got picked out of the lineup. My engagement to him was declared null and void by both of his parents, so I really don't have any claim over him at all. Ranma and me are just friends..."

The last word was spoken at barely a whisper, and it seemed to Leona that the girl was about to break down into tears on the spot. It was amazing that she managed to control herself as well as she had up until now, but rather than return to her work she sat down on one of the stools with a forlorn look that said volumes for the misery that she was obviously feeling.

"In other words," Erin said slowly, "That boy is being forced to marry against his wishes."

"No," Ukyo all but gasped the word, "That's the really sick thing in all of this...Ranma actually loves her...or at least he cares for her...a lot more than he cares about me..."

Without a word Leona moved closer to the girl and tried to get her attention. Ukyo was staring down at the floor in such abject despair and gave her no notice until she felt a hand upon her shoulder and looked up to see Leona regarding her with sympathy and understanding.

"I understand," Leona carefully explained, "I know what hurt like...betrayal. I thought I love a man once...and then he killed me."

Ukyo blinked in spite of the red in her eyes and the tears she had been holding back, then looked at Leona in confusion, "He what?"

Leona silently cursed her unfamiliarity with the language. She had not meant to confess that much, but as had happened so often before she heard Erin come to her rescue by explaining, "A man courting Leona once stabbed her when she did not expect it. She survived, but the hurt is still there. That's what she means when she says she knows what you're going through..."

"No!" Ukyo declared, then more softly she said, "No, it's not like that with Ranchan. I know he cares about me, he just doesn't...love me the way I love him. He's never deliberately tried to hurt me, and it's not really his fault that he got engaged to Akane, or that he...loves her...oh god...!"

Leona stared in amazement at this girl that she had just met. Ukyo's defenses were crumbling before her very eyes, but rather than heap blame on the boy who had rejected her she was defending him against the obvious accusations. Either this girl was very much in love with the boy or she was a glutton for punishment, more probably both. Instantly Leona felt a bond of sympathy for her and recalled the guilty look in the boy's eyes when he had evaded returning the look Ukyo had shone in his presence.

Have I ever been hurt this bad, she wondered? She could still remember the smile on the face of Carlos as he stabbed her through the heart, the shock of dying, of the pain that did not come at first, but then became incredibly overwhelming. Dying had only been temporary, of course, but the hurt had remained long afterwards...especially when she learned that the man she had thought herself in love with was a cold-hearted treacherous serpent who was over six hundred years old and a mass murderer who had gotten his start during the Spanish Inquisition.

She also remembered how he had died fighting Erin, and of the moment when the Quickening had erupted in both of them, the shared sensation that was like a thousand tiny explosions going on all at once with lightning and fireworks as her mind filled with the memories of several hundred years experience...

She returned her attention to the present and stared. Physical pain she could understand...she had certainly experienced enough of it the last two years with Erin. It was the pain of love unrequited and denied that she was less certain about. Carlos had never really loved her, but Ranma obviously liked Ukyo, even if he was engaged to that brute of a girlfriend...

Wait a minute, the rational part of Leona gasped. Girlfriend?

"[You've got to be kidding me!]" she said in English, turning back to look at Erin, "[That guy's marrying that girl? After the way she cleaned his clocks?]"

"[There's obviously more to this story than Ucchan is telling us,]" Erin agreed before turning back to Japanese, "Will you be all right, Ucchan?"

"Oh, sure, never better," Ukyo said tiredly, "I'm used to this by now. Sometimes I...lose it...but...I always get it back in the end. Sorry to make you have to sit through all that...these things just happen."

"He not deserve you," Leona said bitterly, earning a puzzled look from Ukyo as she registered this for a moment.

"You're wrong," Ukyo at last replied, "I don't deserve him. He's too nice a guy to come out and say it but sometimes I just think he comes here to try and cheer me up. We've been friends for so long...it's really my fault that I want it to be different."

"I no understand," Leona shook her head, "How could he want her instead of you?"

"I don't know," Ukyo murmured, then gave Leona a tired nod, "Sorry to hear about you and your boyfriend. Some men are real jerks, but nobody's like my Ranchan..."

"We should go," Erin murmured to Leona, "I'm sorry that we caused you to lose face by our presence. You are a very lovely girl and deserve much better than him. Try not to be so hard on yourself. We'll look you up again in a few days."

"Take care," Leona urged before releasing Ukyo's shoulder as she started to follow Erin out of the restaurant.

Ukyo stopped them both with the words, "You know what the really sick thing is about all this? Ranchan's asked me to be his Best Man. I'm the only real friend he's got so he wants me to be the ring bearer when he marries that...Akane..."

Leona's eyes narrowed but she waited until they were outside before saying, "[That bastard!]"

"[One can only hope if he's a son of Genma,]" Erin said in a thoughtful tone, "[But I don't think the lad's the one to blame here. Ukyo's right on that...and that means he's as much a victim as she is.]"

"[What do you mean?]" Leona asked in puzzlement.

"[Arranged marriage,]" Erin replied, "[They're pretty rare in this day and age but it's still been known to be practice by certain traditional families. Used to be the norm here before modernization.]"

"[You mean his dad and her dad decided this without consulting them?]" Leona was appalled, "[That's disgusting! Since when have parents ever known what was best for their daughters?]"

Erin fetched her with a wry look of amusement and decided not to answer that question, instead murmuring aloud, "[Let's fetch another cab and I'll explain about it on the way to the Temple. There's a few things you ought to know about traditional societies before you go making snap judgements about these matters...]"

"Good Evening," the temple priest bowed to them, "What can this humble priest do for you to brighten your days...Erin-sama?"

"The same," Erin replied with an affable grin as she studied the face of the man, whom Leona knew at once to be a fellow Immortal, "How are you doing these days, Kintaro-san? Still living the religious life, I see. Have you come any closer to finding salvation?"

"Heh, as if you would know what that felt like," the man-who appeared to be in his late thirties but was anything but young-turned his attention towards Leona and asked, "Your new apprentice, I see...or is she your latest conquest?"

"I'm training her," Erin admitted as she gave the Shinto priest a friendly glare before adding, "And never you mind anything else beyond that. I've been giving Leona a tour of my old haunts, and I thought I'd come pay my respects, see what's happened with you since the last time our paths crossed."

"Not much changes with me," the other man replied, "You know that. But I am remiss in my manners. Your young friend obviously wants to know who I am and what I was in another lifetime. The name is Shinjaru Kintaro, former retainer to the Shogun Iyatsu, if you know anything about history."

"No much," Leona admitted, "But I learning."

"Leona Dubois of Kansas," Erin indicated the man, "Kintaro's a fellow who once saved my life. You can trust him, as I do. He's retired from The Game and has lived the simple life of a priest for...has it been three hundred years now?"

"Three hundred eighty seven," Kintaro politely nodded, "But who's counting? So, you're traveling with this notorious English Pirate. I can't say that I envy you, girl, but you must be made of sterner stuff if you've managed to last this long around this kamikaze Celt. So...you're learning to speak Japanese, eh? Not many in the states your age seemed incline to before we started exporting our Anime into your markets."

"I thank you sir," Leona said very carefully, "No hope my bad..." she stumbled, then turned to Erin and asked, "[What the heck is the word for grammar in Japanese?]"

"[Perhaps you should try saying it in your own language,]" Kintaro remarked, "[It's rude for me to want to force you to speak in my tongue.]"

"[Huh?]" Leona blinked, "[You speak English?]"

"[I learned the language before I discovered that I was an Immortal,]" Kintaro replied, "[Spanish missionaries taught some of us Latin and Greek before the Shogunate kicked them out of the country, and there was that one interesting fellow, Blackthorn, who I got to know for a time...]"

"[I'm sure Leona'll be thrilled t'hear all about yer exploits in those days,]" Leona said, "Preferably over a few cups of sake. I take it ye haven't sworn any vows that would forbid th' consumption O' th'wicked brew?]"

"[Do I look like that kind of a monk to you?]" the other man smirked, waving a hand to indicate the part of his shrine that seemed clearly designed for a sleeping quarters, "[My home is yours for the duration, Hiberni. I'll heat up a bottle and we can reminisce about all the things that have happened since your last visit.]"

Leona was obligated to accompany them when the Shinto Priest invited them into his home...really little more than a small set of enclosed rooms that were partitioned off with those sliding ricepaper-on wood-frame doors that she had seen so much of during their stay in Kyoto. The priest set a kettle filled with sake over a low flame while setting out snack foods on a low table while they sat on zabuton cushions and accepted his hospitality, which was more cordial than one might expect from a fellow Immortal.

"I apologize that I don't have more sweet tasting things to share with your apprentice," Kintaro nodded gracefully to Leona before turning his attention back towards Erin, "I don't get much company these days, which is how I kind of like it. The locals accept me and my odd eccentricities, and they don't seem to mind too much that I never age and rarely stray far from this shrine."

"Retirement suits you then," Erin noted, "I'd never have imagined."

"Well, when you've seen as much of the world as I have it's all the same after a while," Kintaro shrugged, then gave Erin a look of irony before adding, "Of course why am I telling you that? You've seen five times as much of it as me and it doesn't seem to have affected you any."

"I'm rarely bored, and life for me is seldom monotonous," Erin noted in dry humor, "Besides, you can never stop learning about life in my opinion. Once you stop looking you basically stop living. I'm just a wee bit amazed to see how much the peaceful life appeals to you. When I think on what a hellraiser you were in the old days..."

"You're calling me a Hellraiser?" the priest snorted, "I like that! But I guess the real reason why I retired...well...you know what happened, the madness that overtook my people, how it affected us, how I was caught up in all the insanity of that evil war," he shook his head in clear regret, "Nankeen is what did it for me. I look back on that and wonder how I could have ever been such a man to have stood by and said nothing, to have even participated in the slaughter..."

"We've all done things of which we're not proud," Erin noted sadly, "You're no worse than many another..."

"But I was a priest even then," Kintaro shook his head, "It was a betrayal of all my beliefs, Shinto, Buddhist and Christian..."

"You were Christian?" Leona asked in surprise.

"Eh...once yes," Kintaro waved a dismissive hand, "A youthful indiscretion, like joining any other large cult. Of course I hid my faith when the Shogunate banned the practice of the Catholic faith. It was easy to submerge Christianity with Buddhism since the two have a lot in common, and I rationalized saving my skin with keeping the flame of hope alive and all that. I was a younger man back then, and given to much foolish behavior."

"Leona was raised a Roman Catholic herself," Erin smiled, "But I've been teaching her more of the Old Ways, so she's getting better."

"My sympathies to you, apprentice," Kintaro smirked, "This Pagan will have you dancing naked around a bonfire before the moon and painting your body with blue wode, assuming you're not already."

Leona half smiled at that, for there were indeed a lot of strange things that she had learned to do under Erin's tutorage, that being the least of them. As she bit into a rice-cracker, however, she noted its relative lack of flavor and could not help contrasting it with the taste of okonomiyaki. The thought saddened her as she once more flashed back to the misery surrounding the girl named Ukyo Kuonji.

"Tell me some news, Kintaro-san," Erin asked as she delicately changed the subject, "How fare some of our old friends? Any left from the old days?"

"Well," the priest mused thoughtfully, "I can tell you that Yosho is still guarding his shrine, same as always, only now he has a grandson to help out, a boy who's been keeping very unusual company, if you take my meaning."

"Achika had a son?" Erin brightened, "How is she doing these days? I haven't had time to pay my respects to the old tree-hugger..."

"Lady Achika, his daughter..." Kintaro allowed his eyes to drift towards the floor, and without needing to say so it was plain that he was speaking of her in the past tense.

"Oh..." Erin's voice conveyed great sadness, "That's too sad for words. I liked her, she was bright, inquisitive child and the light in her father's eyes. I'll definitely have to pay my respects to him when we swing around in his direction."

"Be mindful if you stop by the place," Kintaro cautioned, "Like I said, his grandson keeps unusual company these days, and one of them is none other than the Demoness, Ryoko."

"What, she got loose?" Erin responded with alarm, "But...!"

"Apparently she's in love with Yosho's boy, so she called off her vendetta against the old man," Kintaro replied, "And that's not the weirdest thing going on out there! I hear stories..."

"Excuse me," Leona spoke up, "But you know what about a man name Saotome Ranma?"

Erin was about to chide her ward when Kintaro's voice drew her attention, "Saotome Ranma? What do you know about the son of Genma?"

"Just he boy see girl named Kuonji Ukyo," Leona replied in her halting Japanese, "Only other girl name Tendo Akane..."

"Ah," the priest said sagely, "You ask about one of the great conundrums of our age. "Saotome Ranma is something of a local legend, a young warrior training to become a great martial artist and heir to the Saotome Ryu of Anything Goes Martial Arts. His father took him on a ten year training mission in which he traveled as far as China and came away from this one of the greatest fighters of his generation. To hear some talk one would believe that he is THE best martial artist in all of Japan, only I happen to know of a few others who might give the boy a run for his yen..."

"And what of the girl, Tendo Akane?" Erin frowned, "She wouldn't happen to be Tendo Soun's daughter, would she?"

"The same," the priest nodded, "His youngest, a very troublesome young girl, full of anger and self-contradiction. In many respects she embodies the worst qualities of her mother, who perished when Akane and her sisters were very young. The girl is Soun's heir, and she trained in the Tendo Ryu, only...there are problems limiting the effectiveness of her technique. Much anger in the girl..." he shook his head sadly, "And little control or restraint."

"She seemed unusually violent when I encountered her," Erin frowned, "Like she was spoiling for a fight and trying to prod the boy into fighting back against her, but he just took what dished out and went along with her meekly."

Kintaro nodded sadly, "Genma's influence on the boy. Saotome Ranma cannot bring himself to hit a woman. He knows that he could do serious injury to her if the two of them fought in earnest, so he tries to hold back for fear of hurting her, but she takes this as an insult, inferring that her abilities are not competitive with his. His restraint only fuels her anger, and the only way she knows how to cope with her rage is to strike out at the one whom she identifies as the source of so much of her aggravation."

"And does the boy do much to provoke her...besides not hitting her, that is?" Erin inquired.

"The boy cannot help but offend her," Kintaro said sadly, "He is Genma's son, after all, so he speaks his mind freely and thoughtlessly insults without intending any true malice. To him life is like a game of martial arts in which the opponent is himself, and he berates any weakness he perceives as being less than manly, though he's rather casual in the way he generally deals with his problems."

"Sounds like Genma's influence all right," Erin nodded, "So how did these two wind up engaged in the first place?"

"Rumor has it that the two fathers both got drunk one night and proposed a union of their houses," Kintaro explained, "Though I've heard it was more an agreement made for the practical reason of keeping the Tendo dojo within the family. Soun's wife only gave him daughters, only one of whom turned out to have a real interest in the martial arts, so there was an obvious fear about inheritance laws underlining their agreement. Coupled on that, uniting the two branches of their school would please their Master greatly..."

"Their master?" Erin repeated, sitting upright, "Don't tell me that old goat, Happosai, is still alive and kicking?"

"And just as perverted as ever," Kintaro smiled, "If Karma's not with you he'll probably put in an appearance somewhere to cause trouble, like always."

"What about Kuonji Ukyo?" Leona spoke up, "What her story?"

"Ukyo?" Kintaro grew sad once again, "A very tragic story there. Her father made an agreement with Genma a bit under twelve years ago to engage her to Ranma in exchange for her father's Yatai cart. Genma, of course, took the cart but left the girl behind, and for ten years Ukyo blamed both father and son for that and swore an oath of vengeance. She felt humiliated as a girl, so she started dressing as a boy and vowed to become as good a chef as her father, then ten years later she caught up with Ranma and got the story straight with him, after which she renounced her vengeance."

"She forgave him for abandoning her?" Erin was clearly surprised by this statement.

Kintaro smiled without mirth and said, "Would you believe the boy never even suspected that she was a girl before finding out the hard way? He'd always assumed that Ukyo was a boy, so he had no idea about any engagement between them. He considered Ukyo his best friend and a fellow playmate and was very upset to learn about what his father had done behind his back. Of course Genma acknowledged taking the cart but refused to own up to having done anything wrong in the girl's case, and he's pretty well determined that Ranma will marry Tendo's daughter, so he chooses to ignore his agreement with the Kuonjis..."

"That Bastard," Erin hissed, "I always knew he was no good, even in the old days..."

"It gets worse," Kintaro assured them, "At first Ranma and Akane couldn t even stand to be around each other on account of the boy picking up a rather inconvenient curse while training in China..."

"A curse?" Erin inquired politely.

"It's a bit complicated to explain," Kintaro assured her, "Basically, though, over the course of time Ranma became fond of the girl, even protective whenever she got into any danger. They fight a lot but there is affection underneath the hostility, but still Akane does not trust her iinazuke and had problems allowing herself to express any sort of tenderness with him, though she is unusually possessive. They boy is popular with the ladies...has that sort of charisma, you see...the Saotome charm. His father had it, the Kami know why the ladies always found him attractive..."

"Er...yeah," Erin conceded, "I take it the boy never does anything to encourage this sort of thing?"

"Never a wink or a hint that he finds anyone else more attractive than Akane," Kintaro sighed, "I give the married maybe a year...less than five at the most, and that's assuming he survives the honeymoon since I'm pretty well convinced that Akane won't relax too much with him even after they are married. There's something...not right about her...I'm no psychoanalyst, of course, but there is something that's just basically wrong with being angry so much of the time. The points when she's calm and fairly reasonable to deal with give you no hint of what a real terror she can be when something sets her rage in motion..."

"I know of several mental states that fit that description," Erin said grimly, "Pathological conditions, such as Rage Disorder, which if left untreated doesn't spontaneously cure itself. Sounds to me like a borderline personality disorder. I take it she's never had professional counseling?"

"To the best of my knowledge, no," Kintaro replied, "The child is just too stubborn and prideful to admit that there could be anything wrong with her. The boy himself is hardly lacking in his own list of mental problems, but he's trying to do the 'right' thing by honoring his commitment to her. He's been making an effort not to insult her as often, and he's been listening to his mother's advice on how to coax Akane into remaining calm more often..."

"That can't be too effective if what I saw was any indication," Erin snorted, "I am troubled by all of this, Kintaro-san. It almost seems to be as if history is repeating itself around Saotome Genma, and I know that any agreement he would enter into cannot be a very sound policy. It would seem to me that these children are heading into a real disaster."

"You are not the only one to share this observation," Kintaro nodded, "A betting pool exists, run by one of Akane's older sisters, on just how likely it is that the two of them will marry, and how long it will last...but then again, people will bet on just about anything in this town..."

"Excuse me," Leona said politely as she got up, "Which way to girl room? I have go big time."

"Oh, just down the hall and to your right," Kintaro pointed, "You can't miss it."

"Thank you," Leona bowed, then followed directions to wind up in the lavatory of the small house, once she was inside she cast around and saw the window at one end. It opened easily enough and gave her no problems pushing aside the screen so that she could slip through this gap without making any sounds that might alert Erin.

Once outside Leona headed away from the temple grounds, not hurrying too much until she was certain that she was beyond the wolfishly sharp ears of her Celtic guardian, and then she sought public transportation back towards Ukyo's restaurant, catching hold of the back end of a bus and climbing up on the roof before the driver could be any the wiser. From there she judged her moment and then vaulted onto the roof of another car and rode it until she was ready to dismount a few blocks later.

Though her behavior might have seemed reckless to any casual observer, Leona was merely employing the skills that she had acquired in two years of traveling around with Erin. Being an Immortal meant she could take risks that would daunt a more fragile girl and even risk serious injuries that she knew would heal back in a matter of minutes. In actuality she was being unusually cautious as she did not want to attract the attention of anyone like the police, but it seemed for the most part that the citizens of this prefecture tended to ignore her acrobatics.

About the only time that Leona paused in retracing her steps back towards Ucchan's restaurant was when she felt a familiar tingling sensation in her breast, the warning sense that alerted her to the nearness of a fellow Immortal. She turned to glance over her shoulder, half-fearing that Erin had discovered what she was doing and was seeking to head her off, but nothing showed up to her senses and a moment later the sensation left her.

She continued on her way, her perfect recall of the cab ride from the restaurant to the shrine imprinted indelibly in her head, and so she missed seeing the limousine pull up alongside a curb two blocks away as the driver heeded the instructions of his single passenger, a distinguished gentleman of wealth and bearing who turned to frown over his shoulder, the fleeting sense of a fellow Immortal having caught his notice, though it was plain that whoever it was had been headed in the opposite direction.

The man smiled to himself, a cruel, calculating smile and wondered who it was that had come into his part of town and revealed themselves so brazenly. A chance encounter like this was not to be overlooked as it could provide him with the sport that he most craved to lighten up a dull evening. He told the driver to turn around and head back down the way they had just come, hoping he might sense the presence again and determine for a fact if this were an old enemy come calling or some fresh, new challenge against which me might test his sword skills...

Oblivious to her sudden peril, Leona found Ucchan's and entered the restaurant, finding it near deserted with only Kuonji sitting at a table with her head on her hands, not even bothering to look up at the new patron.

"Go away, we're closed for business," she called out in a tired voice.

"Excuse please?" Leona approached the chef cautiously and saw Ukyo start as she recognized her recent customer, "I wondering...have question...you mind if talk?"

"[Maybe you'd better try it in English,]" Ukyo smiled weakly, seeing Leona's start at being addressed in her own language, "[Your Japanese is even worse than Shampoo's.]"

"[Who?]" Leona wondered at the reference to a hair care product.

"[Never mind,]" Ukyo said, leaning back in her chair, "[How can I help you...Leona, was it?]"

"[Yeah,]" Leona relaxed, feeling much better about not having to stumble around looking for equivalent words to bolster her weak grasp of the Japanese language, "[You talk pretty good English, a lot better than my Japanese.]"

"[I'm from Kansai,]" Ukyo replied, "[English is spoken there like a second language.]"

"[Really?]" Leona grinned as she sat down at a chair near to Ukyo, "[Cool! I'm from Kansas. Small world, huh?]"

"[I guess,]" Ukyo noted, "[So...like I said, Sugar, how can I help you?]"

Leona decided to launch right into business, "[You shouldn't let that jerk marry that bitch, Akane. They're more like Punch and Judy than Romeo and Juliet!]"

"[That's not telling me anything I don't already know,]" Ukyo replied with a soft smile, "[But I thank you for being concerned, Sugar. It's nice to know that there's at least one other person who sees things the same way as I do.]"

"[Then you'll try to break them up?]" Akane asked, "[The way those two act around each other...]"

Ukyo sadly shook her head, "[I've already tried doing everything I know how to break them up, but nothing's worked. It's like the two of them are fated-or doomed-to be together. I even tried bombing their last attempt at having a wedding...]"

"[You what?]" Leona asked, aghast.

"[Nobody got hurt, but that doesn't excuse my behavior,]" Ukyo said sadly, "[I've tried to make it up to Ranchan, and he forgave me, but Akane reminds me and rubs my nose in it every chance she gets...}" she sighed, "[I was desperate, but I should have known better. I was crazy with jealousy and hurt about the betrayal and dishonor and such...but that doesn't excuse what I did, and I've tried to make up for it ever since...]"

"[You must really have it bad for that guy,]" Leona noted, "[In an Amy Fisher/Unabomber kinda way...]"

"[What can I say?]" Ukyo sighed, "[Hang around in this town long enough and you'll be doing all kinds of weird stuff that seems to make sense at the time but afterwards leave you feeling like you took momentary leave of your senses. I guess the plain truth is that I didn't want to let him go, to admit defeat, that I had lost and she had won and that I'd never get...]" she paused, her face once again taking on the forlorn look that had haunted Leona for the past hour, "[That Ranchan...never really loved me...]"

"[He's a jerk,]" Leona remarked, "[You're better than he is, you deserve better.]"

"[Wish I could believe that,]" Ukyo smiled weakly, her eyes red-rimmed and thus spoiling the effect of her effort, "[But the truth is...I'm not the only one in the same boat. There's someone else I'm meeting here who's in even worse shape than me...]"

"Nihao!" a voice called out without any real enthusiasm, "Shampoo is here, Spatula girl. What you want talk-who this?"

Leona turned around and blinked in surprise at the newcomer, a lovely Asian girl who had long purple-colored hair that was offset from the pink, silken Chinese-  
style pajamas she was wearing. Her crimson eyes studied Leona with an expression that could only be described as cat-like, neither wary nor hostile, only curious in a purely disinterested manner.

"Hello, Shampoo," Ukyo responded as if she had expected the new arrival, "This is a friend from America named Leona who's just visiting. I only wanted to talk with you for a bit...is that a problem?"

"Talk?" Shampoo seemed to think the word over then sighed, "Why no? Is nothing better do, now that great grandmother sell restaurant."

"That's what I wanted to talk about," Ukyo remarked, "I got the word from Konatsu that you guys were leaving, and I think I know the reason, but I wanted to hear confirmation."

"What there talk about?" the purple haired girl sighed as she sat down at a table near to Leona and rested her chin on her hands, "Ranma explain everything to great grandmother, she accept, so Shampoo no have job or home...maybe no have life either, so what we talk about, eh?"

"Just that," Ukyo said, "What are you gonna do with your life now that we've both lost out? I hear they won't take you back home on account of some disgrace or something...Mousse wasn't too specific."

"Stupid Mousse," Shampoo sniffed, "Figure he tell you about Shampoo secret shame. No can go home and bring shame to family. Is disgrace Shampoo's alone, no want make great grandmother suffer."

"Mousse seemed to think you had one option," Ukyo nodded, "I'm pretty sure you know what that is, considering the way his mind works."

The purple haired girl's flashed with genuine anger, "Stupid, stupid Mousse! Him think only one thing! Is big opportunity for him if Shampoo become wife to protect family! Shampoo sooner boiled alive than do this!"

"A little extreme, don't you think, Sugar?" Ukyo noted, "He's not all that bad as guys go in this prefecture..."

"Then why stupid Spatula Girl no marry him?" the purple haired girl declared in open contempt, "Mousse weak and selfish, no listen ever to Shampoo! Shampoo no marry him before she have Airen, no marry him even if Airen marry violent Akane!"

"Then maybe I can offer a third alternative," Ukyo replied, "One that doesn't require that anybody get hurt. I know you've pretty much given up on revenge, like me..."

The purple haired girl subsided, "Is true...what is point? Nothing Shampoo do change Airen heart..."

"Seems to me we've got a lot in common, Sugar," Ukyo nodded sadly, "We've both lost Ranma, and we both hate Akane. She may have taken the jackass, not to mention every single ounce of pride and honor that either one of us has ever had to our name, but I won't sit still and let her take what's left of the rest of my life, so maybe it's time to move on and make plans for...for getting past our losses. Since you don't have anything better lined up...I was hoping that maybe we...could work out some kind of an arrangement. I mean...misery loves company, right?"

"What you saying?" Shampoo asked with a wary, neutral expression, "You is...offering Shampoo something?"

"A Job," Ukyo replied, "Come work for me and you can have the upstairs loft, next to Konatsu. He's away visiting relatives but he won't mind having a new neighbor, just like won't much mind having you for a room mate. It's a lot better than the alternative...for either of us, Sugar. I mean...you weren't really planning to kill yourself over that big jerk, were you? That'd just make Akane the winner, and you Amazons really hate losing."

"Is true," Shampoo looked down at the table, "Shampoo not know what to say. Never get along with Spatula girl in past..."

"That's mainly because we were both after the same thing," Ukyo countered, "Without that in the way...who knows? We might even learn how to become friends..."

"Friends?" Shampoo considered the word, "Never have real friends...not since...long ago..."

"[Um...excuse me?]" Leona spoke up, "[I don't mean to be rude or anything, but...is she saying her name is Shampoo?]"

"[Yeah,]" Ukyo replied, "[Go with it. She's an Amazon from China, and formerly one of my biggest rivals for Ranchan...]"

"What you say?" Shampoo looked at them in confusion.

"Ah..." Leona turned back to the girl with a sheepish smile, "I sorry I butt in...is just question I have...my name Leona...Leona Dubois..."

"Leona...is name for Lioness, yes?" the purple haired girl looked from Leona to Ukyo as if seeking confirmation.

"[Uh...right,]" Leona conceded, "I sorry I interrupt...go on with talk. I..."

All of a sudden the spider webs crawled up and down Leona's back and did a tap dance on her nervous system. Leona's head came up sharply as she glanced around the interior of the restaurant, then slowly turned to face the entrance, rising up out of her chair as she did so.

"What's wrong, Sugar?" Ukyo asked, "You look like you just saw a ghost or something...?"

Leona did not answer, nor did she have to as a man came walking in through the front doors, a very tall, clean-shaven man in very fine tailored clothing, who glanced at the three girls hovering around the table before latching his eyes upon Leona, and then smiling in a cruel and calculating manner.

"[Guys,]" Leona whispered over one shoulder without taking her eyes off of the stranger, "[There wouldn't happen to be a back exit to this place, would there?]"

"[There is,]" Ukyo replied, "[Why? Do you know this Turkey?]"

"[She knows of me, who and what I am,]" the man himself replied, reaching into his coat and pulling out a very ancient-looking katana, reverting to Japanese, "I am Tonada Shinji of the Koga prefecture."

Leona remained motionless for a moment, but then very slowly reached up to her collar, keeping her eyes on the man the full time as she drew her own katana from its hidden sheath. It was not as long as a regular katana, closer to a Ninja-to in length, but sharp enough to do its business as she assumed a defensive crouch and declared, "[I'm Leona Dubois of Kansas City, and if you've got a beef with me, don't include my friends here!]"

Behind her back Leona sensed Ukyo pulling out that huge iron spatula that she had been brandishing about earlier, but then she caught movement out of the corner of her other eye and saw that Shampoo, too, was now armed with a pair of rounded maces (and never mind where she had been keeping those things concealed!) and was taking a flanking position.

"[Ah,]" the man smiled, "[But your friends interest me almost as much as do you. An Amazon from China and an outcast Ninja girl playing at being a humble chef. Indeed, three prizes for the sake of one. Such a fortunate happenstance must be the work of the Kami.]"

"[Get out of here, guys!]" Leona called over her shoulder, "[I'll try and hold him off!]"

"[No way, Sugar,]" Ukyo replied, "[This guy's on my turf, and nobody threatens my customers in my restaurant!]"

"Shampoo not know what stupid words mean," Shampoo added for her own part, "But Shampoo no like look of guy making threats. Maybe teach him no make threatening noise to womans of Amazons?"

"That's women, Sugar," Ukyo corrected, "And it's kind of redundant to use women and Amazon in the same sentence..."

"I can see you're not taking my threat very seriously," the strange man noted wryly, "Which means I am going to have to teach you the error of your presumption! SHADOW STORM!"

The stranger lifted his blade and suddenly Leona felt the hackles along her arms and the nape of her neck begin to stand on end as she sensed the power welling up within the other man, who was surrounded by a dark halo of energy before the light congealed around his blade, and all at once the energy exploded outward, catching all three girls by surprise and hurling them backwards like straws before a hurricane. Leona managed to catch the brunt of it without immediately blacking out, but enough was left over to send her new friends hurtling back into the back wall of the restaurant, where all three collided with bone-jarring effect while every piece of furniture in the place was scattered by the blast in all directions...

Continued.

Comments/Criticism/Celtic Highlander: shadowmane

Who is this mysterious stranger and what are his designs for Leona and her two companions? If you know anything about the regular Highlander series you can pretty much guess what fate awaits our pretty heroine from Kansas if she loses, but how does this affect Ukyo, Shampoo, or even Ranma for that matter? And what of Leona's guardian, the indomitable Ice Warrior of the Iceni Celts, Erin O'Shea? If you want the answers to these and other questions, tune in for next time and the second part of this grand adventure! Be there!

(The characters Erin or O'Shea and Leona Dubois are the creations of Jim Robert Bader and bear only passing resemblance to the characters and situations found in the regular Highlander series, from whose inspiration the basic concepts have been freely adapted.)

X

If you wish to check out my other works, Please check out my Fanfiction webpage at: . or it's mirror site at: ~ All related chapters of this series can be found there along with my other works. 


	2. Chapter 2

IlMNerima2

Ill Met in Nerima

By Jim Robert Bader

(Based on the works of Rumiko Takahashi and the concepts created for the Highlander Series.)

Part Two.

"Ranma," murmured Kasumi as she gently applied the bandages to the martial artist's face, "I do wish you and Akane wouldn't argue so much. The two of you are going to be married soon and it's long since time you both learned to get along better."

"I'm not the one you should be telling this to, Kasumi," Ranma replied in a soft, sullen, resigned tone of voice, "I'm trying to be more nice to her...really, I am trying! It just that nothing I say seems to work with her any more. She interprets everything badly, like she wants to stay mad at me, or something."

"That's not true," Kasumi replied, "Akane may be a violent girl, and she certainly does get angry a lot more than she used to, but deep down you know that she doesn't mean to be hurtful. She's just not always able to cope with her feelings..."

"Huh, when has she ever even bothered?" Ranma fumed, "Face it, Kasumi, she's never gonna be like you. She can't even restrain herself like Ucchan, and I know she wanted to hit Akane a while ago..."

"Oh my," Kasumi said, "Are you still visiting with your friend? You must know that the time you spend with Ukyo is making Akane feel...inadequate and jealous."

"That's right, Kasumi," her father said as he appeared in the room, followed by Ranma's father, "Son, you must stop seeing that Kuonji girl. Now that your engagement to her has been nullified, you should not be encouraging her by paying these visits..."

"Lay off, Mister Tendo," Ranma said tiredly, "I ain't gonna turn my back on Ucchan, even is she ain't my fianc e anymore. Don't waste your time trying to convince me to give up the only real friend I've got..."

"Foolish boy, why must you be so stubborn?" Saotome Genma demanded, "It's because you won't stop encouraging the Kuonji girl that Akane is feeling so jealous! If you want her to calm down, then you have to stop visiting that woman!"

"Shut up, old man," Ranma glared at his father, "If it wasn't for you making all these stupid arrangements behind my back I'd never have gotten into that mess with Ucchan in the first place. I'm doing the right thing and marrying Akane, which was also your idea, so lay off and stop bugging me about it! Now, is dinner gonna be soon, and please don't tell me you let Akane near the kitchen?"

"Ranma," Kasumi sighed, "I know Akane isn't the best cook around, but you have to see that she is trying to improve herself..."

"For once I agree with Saotome," Nabiki called out from where she was calmly reading the paper, pretending to tune out everything that went on around her while actually soaking it all in with less-than-casual interest, "Akane's just no good at any domestic stuff, so you might as well stop wasting your time with her, Kasumi. She just doesn't have your talent for making things edible, no matter how much she wants to do better."

"Nabiki," Kasumi replied in mild exasperation, when all of a sudden an explosion shook the air, causing all eyes to turn around to seek the source of the explosion, which sounded as though it were only a mile away in distance.

"What was that?" Soun asked.

"I think I see smoke," Genma shielded his eyes, "It's coming from the financial district..."

"Ucchan!" Ranma was on his feet before the idea was even formed in his mind, and some gut-level instinct warned him that his childhood friend was in some kind of danger. He rushed out into the yard before anyone could stop him, even as Genma and Soun called out to him to come back, and he was over the wall before their sentences were even half finished.

"What's going on?" Akane asked as she descended the stairs and saw everyone facing in one direction, which prompted her to frown as she asked, "Where's Ranma?"

"Ranma went to investigate the explosion," Kasumi replied, "He thinks it may have involved Ukyo..."

"What? That pervert!" Akane exclaimed in frustration, "And after I warned him not to go near her..." she angrily stomped her way towards the front door and retrieved her shoes, clearly meaning to follow.

"Akane," Soun turned to his youngest daughter, "You do your father proud..." but before he could finish his statement she, too, headed out the front door and vanished.

Nabiki glanced down, seeming to read the paper again, but spread out before her did a book on Psychotherapy that she had been reading in concealment, not wanting to let others know what was holding her attention. She glanced at the gate where Ranma had vanished, then looked back at the door with a troubled expression, then went back to reading about abnormal mental states and borderline personality disorders, which too was for something other than a casual interest...

Among the various advantages that came with Immortality was a certain high resistance to energy-based attacks, which was what prevented Leona from losing consciousness after she was slammed into a wall, along with her companions. The kinetic force of the blast was enough to rattle her up severely, but she began to recover from the impact with the speed of a born survivor. She caught her weight on her feet and did not go down as the looked up at the face of her attacker and tried to regain her focus.

"[Not bad,]" he commented as he lowered his sword and surveyed his own handiwork, "[I can see you've had good training.]"

"[What the heck was that]?" Leona gasped, feeling like a mule had just kicked her.

"[The proper Japanese name for the technique might be beyond your understanding, Gaijin,]" the man answered with a somewhat smug expression, "[But in your barbaric tongue it would be called 'Shadowfist Rising,' a form of technique that draws upon the wielder's own Ki, and-being an Immortal myself-I have a lot more to draw upon than any ordinary mortal.]"

Leona got her sword back up and at the ready, "[If you've hurt my new friends...]"

A low groan from Ukyo signified the Chef's recovery from her own rude encounter with the wall, "[Not a chance, Sugar...it takes more than that deal with a Kuonji, and nobody trashes my restaurant without answering to me...]" she levered herself back into a standing posture using her bakers peel then stood wavering on legs that refused to fully support her.

"Ordinarily that might mean something," the man sneered at the Okonomiyaki chef's bravado, "[But in the state that you are in, Kuonji-san, I doubt that you'll be giving me much...]"

All at once the man whirled as Shampoo leaped up from the concealment of several overturned tables to attack with her bonbori. He met and resisted her blows, turning her thrusts aside before spinning his body about and causing her to slide around to the side of him, thus leaving her momentarily open to a sharp elbow-thrust that connected with the back of her head and toppled the Amazon forward.

"Shampoo!" Ukyo cried, leaping forward with her baker's peel at the ready.

"[No wait, you guys can't fight him!]" Leona called out in warning.

The warning proved proficient, for Ukyo was not sufficiently recovered to execute her attack in the manner that she had intended. Her legs gave out on her mid-way into her charge, causing her to stumble and fall, leaving her backside exposed as the man reversed the grip on his blade and prepared to stab her.

Leona was no where near as fast as either Shampoo or Ukyo, but she covered the ground with as much speed as she could manage and arrive in time to deflect the sword thrust with her own blade, turning it aside so that it missed pinning Ukyo to the floor. The sight of naked steel just missing her by inches galvanized Ukyo to call upon her reserves so that she flipped herself up to her feet, ignoring her body's protests, and with baker's peel in hand tried thrusting at the swordsman, who easily dodged her attack and came around with his hand moving towards his belt in a tell-tale manner.

Instinct warned Leona what the man was about to do in the second or so that it took to pivot her body and interpose herself between the man and the knife that he had drawn while using his sword to deflect Ukyo's next thrust. Instead of sinking into the unguarded flanks of the Okonomiyaki chef the knife instead buried itself in Leona's stomach, knocking the wind out of her as she nearly lost her grip on her sword blade.

"BASTARD!" Ukyo cried, reaching into her shirt and pulling out one of her explosive bags of flour. She threw it at the floor, kicking up a cloud that obscured the man's vision while Ukyo reached out and took Leona by the arm, then dragged her way from their assailant, even as Shampoo was just beginning to rise to her own feet, wobbly and by no means ready for battle.

"Shampoo, we gotta stage a retreat here, Leona's been hurt!"

The Amazon acknowledged understanding, and together the three of them headed for the back, Leona barely able to move as she was pulled to safety while their opponent calmly waited for the cloud to disperse before surveying the field of battle.

The swordsman smiled to himself, in spite of seeing an empty restaurant. The game was afoot, as a western writer once noted, and he dearly loved the chase. Besides which the girls were injured and not likely to get far supporting a wounded Immortal.

Leona was trying to pull the knife out of her stomach when Ukyo urged her not to, saying, "[Don't do that or you'll bleed to death, Sugar. Better leave it in until we can get you to Doctor Tofu.]"

"[N-No doctors...]" Leona said raggedly as she tugged the knife out anyway, almost passing out on the spot while putting a hand over her stomach and waiting for her body to recover.

"Kuso!" Ukyo hissed as she lowered Leona to the ground, "You Jackass! Shampoo, we've got to bind her wound and..."

"[Don't...bother,]" Leona gasped, "[I'll be all right...just give me another minute...]"

"[A minute?]" Ukyo said in disbelief, "[Hon, you won't last thirty seconds with that...]"

"Ukyo," Shampoo touched the chef's arm after she pulled Leona's shirt open and looked in astonishment at the wound, "She stop bleeding! Wound is closing!"

"W-what?" Ukyo stammered in disbelief, looking for some sign of the wound, only to see a brief spark of electricity flash, and then the wound was gone altogether.

"[I told you,]" Leona smiled weakly, "[I heal pretty fast...that hurt a lot, but it was really nothing...]"

"[Nothing?]" Ukyo exclaimed in disbelief, "[You should be dead! You've got blood all over your clothes...!]"

"[Yeah,] Leona said in mild disgust as she felt her strength slowly return to her, "[I really hate when that happens. Now I gotta change, and all my stuff is with Erin.]"

"Ukyo," Shampoo compelled the chef to look at her, "She is one of the Undying! Shampoo hear many legends about ones who no can die like normal people..."

"[If that's supposed to mean what I think it does,]" Leona nodded simply, "[Then yeah...I'm an Immortal. Big surprise that, heh?]"

"[An Immortal?]" Ukyo exclaimed, "[But...]"

Shampoo glanced off to the side and said, "No good time ask question. Shampoo say we talk later, after we escape from strange man!"

Both Ukyo and Leona turned to see the car barreling down the alleyway, the swordsman behind the wheel as his nominal driver had been compelled to exit the vehicle before this.

"[If that means run like hell,]" Leona remarked, "[Then I second the motion!]"

Ukyo and Shampoo helped Leona back to her feet, then as one the three of them began running as fast as they could to avoid the oncoming limousine and its maniacal driver, who floored the pedal as though he had no fear whatsoever about crashing...

"That little fool!" Erin exclaimed as she saw the open window above the privy, "I should have known she'd pull something like this without waiting for permission."

"Where do you suppose she went off to?" Kintaro asked with some alarm, "This is not a safe place for an apprentice Immortal on her own...there are a lot of our kind preying the streets of Japan, and some harken back to the old days."

"Don't you think I know that?" Erin snapped impatiently, "She must have been moved by all that talk about the Saotome boy and his engagement. Knowing her she's probably gone off to do something about it."

"You're kidding," Kintaro blanched, "No one in their right mind would want to get into the middle of the Saotome boy and his problems! That would be like interfering in that love triangle surrounding Yosho's grandson. Even for us it's suicide!"

"No," Erin replied, clutching the cane that was always near to her hand, "It's homicide, which is what I'll do if anybody picks a fight with my Leona! She's more than just another apprentice to me..."

"I know," Kintaro nodded, "That much was obvious, even if I didn't know about you and your habits."

"My apologies for cutting this visit short," Erin bowed to the man, "It was good to see you with your head still on your shoulders, old friend. But now...I've got to catch up with my Baka of an apprentice."

"Good luck to you and my the Kami give their blessings," the priest bowed in return, "But I'll save the rest of my prayers for anyone foolish enough to cross swords with Erin of the Iceni."

"And well you should," Erin murmured under her breath as she again purposely fingered her sword cane...

Ranma stood at the entrance of Ukyo's restaurant and right away he knew that something had happened. It wasn't just the fact that the place looked like the scene of a major battleground...Ucchan's had been trashed up more times in a fight than the Nekohanten easy! No, it was the way in which the furniture had been blasted away, as though by a Happodaiken explosion. Somehow, though, Ranma doubted that this was one of the old pervert's explosive pranks...there was a very negative resonance in the air, and without having to be told so he knew at once that her assailant was no ordinary foeman.

Ki attacks were rare, mainly owing to the fact that the number of people who could manifest such a powerful (and negative) life-energy discharge were remarkably few, and fewer still had the special training it required. Usually people that powerful went looking for Ranma to test their abilities against him while ignoring martial artists who were without a special Ki-burst. As strong a fighter as Ukyo was she had never manifested a Ki attack to Ranma s awareness, so she was a less logical target than himself, unless the person attacking her had some kind of specific objective.

Shampoo and the Old woman were capable of such a thing, but neither one had sufficient reason to want to harm Ukyo since neither she nor Shampoo were any longer in contention to marry Ranma. He was confident that he had gotten it across to the old woman that he would not honor the Amazon customs that bound Shampoo to him, so why even bother attacking Ukyo? The old ghoul seemed lately to have lost the spirit for continuing the rivalry anyway...in fact Ranma was rather surprised at the way she had accepted his declaration, like it was already a foregone conclusion.

Who else then? Mousse? Unlikely, not unless the baka was even more blind than Ranma could even remember. Ryoga was capable of such an explosive discharge, but even depressed as he could get he would have no cause to do a Shi Shi Hokoudan in the middle of Ucchan's. Tarou wouldn't have bothered blasting Ucchan when he could just come barreling through the place in his cursed form, so that pretty much ruled out the Martial Artists Ranma knew who were most likely to do this.

That meant somebody new, someone Ranma had never met before, possibly even an old enemy of Ukyo's who wasn't above cutting loose with massive overkill and half destroying the place in the process. Maybe somebody from her past was coming to pay a visit, and from the looks of thing this guy did not have warm and fuzzy feelings towards Ukyo. Ranma knew his best friend had a somewhat abrasive manner and could sometimes rub certain people the wrong way, but nothing that could explain the degree of devastation he saw evidenced in the abandoned restaurant. A good thing-from the looks of things-that Ukyo had been closing early for the day or there might have been a gas fire explosion. As it was her insurance premiums were going to be enough to give Nabiki heart palpitations.

And that broached the next most obvious question...where was Ucchan? Ranma knew that she must have gotten out of there in a hurry, borrowing a page from the Saotome School and going to ground until she could determine an effective strategy for turning things to her advantage. Ordinarily she would have come looking for him under the basic logic of safety in numbers or seeking reinforcements, but Ranma did not detect any trace of her on the way to her place, which meant she must have gone in the opposite direction, drawing her attack away from the restaurant.

And that worried Ranma greatly, for by herself Ukyo might far well against any ordinary opponent, but against a Ki-force master she was woefully at a disadvantage. If this guy were the persistent sort then he would be after her like Happosai in a girl's locker room, and if he caught up with her before Ranma...

He was out the door and back on the streets again even as he drew these conclusions, barely second after arriving at Ucchan's. Ranma leaped for the rooftops and began running like the very devil was on his heels, because he was certain that A DEVIL was on Ukyo's heels and no doubt closing rapidly, and if anything happened to his only true friend, Ranma would make that guy pay in spades! No one messed with his friends, and no matter how good they were, they would still regret the day that they crossed paths with Saotome Ranma...!

"[Look out!]" Leona cried as the trio suddenly found themselves at the end of a blind alley. With the car continuing to bear down on them and no where for them to run or hide she cast an eye upwards but found no convenient handhold or ladder within arms reach.

Shampoo and Ukyo exchanged looks then each took their new friend by the arm and leaped. Leona had only a half second to prepare as she felt her stomach drop down through her feet, and suddenly she was looking down at the alley from a very high place, while her companions easily cleared the rim of the surrounding buildings, three stories above the tarmac.

The sound of the front end of the limousine crashing into concrete was the only thing that sounded louder than the beat of Leona's heart as she staggered onto the roof of one building, then gasped aloud, "[How the heck did you do that?]"

"[Trade secret?]" Ukyo grinned, "[Honestly, the first thing any martial artist of quality learns how to do is to project their Ki into a super-leap. Three stories is a bit much, but between the two of us, Shampoo and me were able to haul your butt to safety.]"

"Shampoo think evil man with sword have big headache if he survive that," Shampoo glanced back down over the edge.

"Uh..." Leona interpreted the heavily accented Japanese then replied, "Is no chance he die. He Immortal, like me...no kill one who undying unless take head first..." she made a slicing motion with one hand across her neck, then swallowed.

"You can't die unless somebody beheads you?" Ukyo blinked.

"Is traditional way to kill the Undying," Shampoo replied, "But no easy do if they good enough to live hundred or more years. Is like fighting with Great Grandmother."

"Good point," Ukyo unslung her baker's peel, "But at least we've got a fighting chance if they can be taken down like that. You still carry that sword on you, Shampoo-san?"

In response Shampoo drew a huge tulwar from seemingly out of no where and said, "That answer question?"

Leona goggled as the compared the size of the thing with the Amazon herself then said, "[We're gonna have to compare notes sometime. It's hard enough for me to move with this thing hidden on my body,]" she indicated her short-bladed Katana.

A sound of movement drew their attention back to the car below them, and the three friends glanced down in time to see the sun-roof being forced back as the man crawled onto the roof of his damaged vehicle with sword in hand, looking ready to resume the confrontation.

"You ever think that guy doesn't know how to take a hint?" Ukyo wondered.

"[You better let me take him, guys,]" Leona urged, "[If you do kill him, then I'm the only one who can handle the discharge.]"

"[Discharge?]" Ukyo repeated.

"[The Quickening inside us Immortals comes out when we die,]" Leona explained, "[It's...pretty spectacular...and the last thing you want to do is be holding something metal when it happens, believe me!]"

"Is legend that Undying unleash breath of Sky Dragon if they die," Shampoo explained to Ukyo, "Many times more intense than be hit by Ranma Mako Takabishi."

All at once the figure of the man called Tonada Shinji came rocketing over the edge of the building, vaulting clear over their heads as he somersaulted and came down from behind them with his weapon drawn and at the ready. As he smiled at the three girls it suddenly became plain that their weapons or their numbers did not intimidate him.

"Now then," he mused, "Where did we leave off?"

Leona took a step forward with her sword at the ready while Ukyo and Shampoo fanned out to either side. The man did not lose his smile as they encircled him but only lowered his sword to point at an angle towards the roof, clearly confident of victory, which made Leona all the more nervous.

"Guys...?" she asked in a wary voice.

Ukyo brought her bakers peel up and launched an attack while Shampoo did likewise, handling the huge sword in her hand as though it were much lighter. The man did not even look worried as he calmly stepped to one side and dodged Ukyo's swing while driving an elbow inside her guard and knocking the wind out of her sails. In the same motion he kicked outward and caught Shampoo under the chin while deflecting her tulwar, and both girls went down heavily as he continued to keep his focus towards Leona.

"Disappointing," he mused, "From their reputation I would have expected a lot better. You, however, might be worth a few moments of amusement."

He took a step forward as Leona held her ground, not wanting o betray herself as she rated this guy as well above the average level player. He had avoided using killing moves against her two friends, but there was no guarantee that he would do likewise in her case. Indeed, the gleam in his eye showed that he was serious in wanting to test her mettle, and with Immortals there was no telling if they wanted to take your head or not. She tried to relax and allow the reflexes built up in her by two years of intense training with Erin to flow naturally from within her, only before the man could attack she heard another voice intrude upon the setting.

"I don't know who you think you are, guy, but for doing that to Shampoo and Ucchan, I'm gonna kick your butt royal!"

"Eh?" the man named Tonada turned to see Ranma standing a short distance away, and with a narrowing of his eyes he said, "Saotome Ranma, if I'm not mistaken?"

"You know me," Ranma said gruffly, "But I don't know you from a hole in the ground, which is where I'm gonna put you if you don't back off this minute!"

"I suppose that line intimidates the amateurs you usually call your sparring partners," Tonada raised his sword high, "But I was dealing with young Punks like you before your ancestors were in diapers!"

"R-Ranchan...watch out...!" Ukyo gasped from where she was laying, trying desperately to get her wind back.

Ranma sensed the build up of power that surrounded his new opponent, and instantly he knew that this guy was a hundred times more dangerous than Tatewaki Kuno. He stood ready as he sized the moment up, waiting for the guy to make his move before suddenly accelerating into full motion. The black energy that swirled around the man came crashing down again, striking the roof of the building like a self-generated bolt of lightning, only no one was there to take the impact.

Leona herself was gasping as she felt an arm go around her waist, and then to her complete astonishment she discovered that the boy named Ranma was holding not only her but Ukyo and Shampoo in his arms as the four of them were suddenly airborne, just precisely one second before the concussive force of the explosion behind them kicked them up and propelled them further outward.

"Don't worry!" Leona heard Ranma shout over the rush of wind in his ears, "This happens all the time when I fight with the pervert!"

"No worry?" Leona did the one thing she knew better than to do from any great height, which was to look downward at the approaching canal that opened up beneath them, "What about that?"

"Huh?" Ranma had time enough to gasp before Leona thought she caught the words, "IT FIGURES...!" one second before they went splashing into the water.

Akane heard the sounds of an explosion and looked up, seeing what looked like Ranma holding three women in his arms while a huge eruption destroyed part of the building directly behind him. She tracked his movement, saw the canal looming underneath him and sighed with the familiar sense of d j vu all over. It only made sense that with a thousand square meters of open ground in which to land that Ranma would somehow manage to find the only available source of open water!

She didn't know what the baka was up to this time, but she was going to have words with him if he was out to embarrass her yet again, especially with that tart, Shampoo, and that meddlesome Ukyo. Akane was done putting up with his antics, and while she knew objectively that Ranma did not deliberately set out to cause half the problems that seemed to follow him around in life, a great deal of those problems were of his making, and Akane was putting her foot down about it. Whomever it was that Ranma was fighting against this time, it was long since time that he learned that he was HER fianc e, and his wings were about to get clipped, one way or the other...!

Erin, too, heard the distant sound of an explosion and had a flash in her mind of Leona falling from a great height, somehow contriving to land in one of the local canals with several other bodies who could not immediately be identified in the instant of their rapport. Erin had a sense of looming danger that usually portended an enemy was after her young apprentice

Erin sighed in private reflection as she quickened her pace, seeking the telltale sign of Leona's presence, which would draw her like a magnet. Only Leona could get into this much trouble on her own in a foreign city where she was barely even fluent in the language. Bad enough her meddlesome apprentice was being drawn into the romantic polygon that apparently surrounded the son of Saotome Genma. Like father, like son she reflected grimly, thinking over how many times she had seen that truism be demonstrated over the two millennia of her existence.

Things were never like this in the lands of the Iceni, she reflected, where a Celtic warrior woman could practice her trade and not be bothered that her husband was off chasing another woman. Erin remembered her first husband fondly, but their marriage had never been strictly monogamous on either end. For her own part she had been certain to not fool around with other men so that her husband could be certain whose children were his (though she was to learn later on that she could not have children, so she need not have bothered). Life was simpler back then, before the Roman went and messed everything up, then imported their foreign religion that held that women were property who could be owned exclusively by their husbands.

And here she was twelve husbands and nineteen and a half centuries later, still chasing younger women, as though the thought of spending as much time with a man were still a form of cheating on Roland's memory. A creature of habits was what she was, both soldier and scholar, but first and foremost a lover, in between the years when she wasn't wearing a Nun's habit. She'd had more fun during her years as an outlaw and soldier of fortune, either a pirate or a treasure hunter, and the adventures she'd had...ah! Leona had only just begun to have a taste of the possibilities that came with Immortality. It would be a crying shame if someone were to cut her time short before her time of living had truly begun.

Erin tightened her grip upon her cane while flexing the fingers of her other hand to limber her joints. Unfortunate because Erin would tear the city apart with her bare hands if anything befell her ward and apprentice. Leona had come to mean a great deal to her in the brief two years that they had been together, and while she could be vexing on occasions, life would be too dull for imagining without her.

Whoever dared threaten her Leona had better beware, for Erin the Hiberian was on the prowl, last of the Iceni legions who had followed Boadicea, and woe betide the fool who dared to cross her path, for she was in no mood to suffer fools gladly, her fears for Leona's safety growing with intensity each foot she came nearer to the trail of her wayward apprentice...

Tatewaki Kuno was vexed with the eternal conundrum of his existence, torn with desire between the two great loves of his life, and wondering how he-cad that he was-could dare to trifle with their affections!

In his pocket were the latest pictures which he had purchased from the Mercenary Nabiki Tendo, (for which his wallet was a few thousand yen lighter) the sight of which further inflamed his torment as he could not discern which of those photographs was more near and dear to his heart. As he contemplated these images that filled his waking thoughts, a flash of white hair caught his attention and caused him to hesitate in mid-step, replaying in his mind the general impression created in the briefest of mere instants.

White hair? On the face of a woman so fair that the gods themselves would weep with shame? And he did not even have to glance down to recognize her for she was-if anything-a few inches taller even than himself, yet so slender and blade-  
thin that one might not notice her unusual size-or even the fact that she was an obvious foreigner-nor slight her in the leastmost portion, for she was entirely and unmistakably a woman!

Kuno turned around to see the woman continuing on past him, and suddenly a memory resurfaced to place where he had seen that beauteous profile once before. Was it possible? Could it be? Surely not, for she did not appear too many years older than himself, yet was the very spitting image of one whom he had encountered when he was but a mere lad. Had such a vision of divine radiance returned to Japan and into his life after so long ago a parting?

Kuno only hesitated long enough to decide that this matter bore investigation, so without another thought he turned and followed her at what he hoped would be a discrete distance.

Erin had noticed the youth right away and felt a familiar sensation in his presence, but she knew he was not an Immortal and so dismissed the possibility that he was stalking her, even though his movements and odd manner of dress suggested that he was a student of Kendo. She would watch him carefully out of the corner of her eye and determine if he were someone to be avoided or confronted. She had no time to trifle with him other than this, for any delay might be fatal to Leona, and so she continued on ahead, giving not the least hint that she was aware of being followed.

Besides which there was something about the boy that was vaguely familiar, and that-too-bore further investigation...

Leona sputtered as she broke the surface of the water, convinced that she had drunk half the length upon her landing. Falling from that high into water had not been a cakewalk, even by her standard, though it certainly had hurt a lot less than impacting on concrete. A good thing that she was incapable of drowning or she might have been swept out to sea. As it was she was really going to have to change clothing very soon, because the canal water was not all that clean and was in fact composed of run-off from a recent rainstorm.

As she started to taste air again, however, her next immediate thought was for her recent companions.

"Ukyo?" she called out, sputtering as she received another mouthful of water.

"Leona?" a voice called from far, far away, "Leona, where are you?"

"Right here!" Leona called out, sputtering as yet another wave tried to get into her mouth.

"Stay there," an unfamiliar voice called out, "I'm coming to get you!"

Leona wondered who that was, because the voice did not sound like Shampoo, but her Japanese was so rudimentary that she probably could have been mistaken. However she was not mistaken when-a moment later, an unfamiliar girl swam up to join her and said, "Try standing up, it ain't that deep."

Leona wondered what the girl was going on about, but out of habit for obeying Erin she did was she was told and discovered a solid concrete surface beneath her feet. She straightened up her body and found that she could resist the pull of the tide and even rise above shoulder level in the water.

"There you go," said a redheaded girl with vivid blue eyes as she also stood up, only she didn't quite reach as high as Leona's collar, "Now that ain't so bad, was it?"

"Uh...thank you," Leona said awkwardly, looking at the redheaded girl before turning and seeing Ukyo standing along the shore dripping wet with a soaked-down cat riding on her shoulders, but there was no sign of the other girl who had fallen with them, or Ranma. Leona looked around with concern and said, "Where Shampoo and Ranma?"

"Ah, don't worry about them," the redhead replied, "They're just fine," and she took Leona by the hand to help her along to shore, which helped Leona resist the further pull of the current. Once on shore Leona replaced her sword back in its hidden sheath, then she turned to Ukyo but avoided looking directly at her for some reason, saying, "Sorry about leaving your spatula behind, Ucchan, but it was either you or it..."

"Don't worry about it, Ranchan," she replied, "I don't think it would have helped much against that guy anyway..."

"Ranchan?" Leona looked towards the girl, then back at Ranma.

The cat meowed, and suddenly the redhead gave a shudder and almost flinched away from Ukyo, to which the cat actually seemed to lower its head with regret as Ukyo absently stroked her between the ears with one hand.

"It's a long story," the redhead replied, "In fact you probably won't believe it...nobody ever does the first time I tell them..."

"RANMA!"

This time the redhead did flinch, raising her hands as she called out, "It's not what it looks like, Akane!"

Leona turned to see the angry shorthaired girl from before stalking down the side of the canal with a look of irate determination. Remembering the scene from Ucchan's restaurant from before, Leona interposed herself between the shorthaired girl and the redhead, but the girl never even looked at her, and when she came within reach of Leona her fist suddenly came flying at Leona, who reacted as she had been trained on prior occasions by shifting to the left and allowing the roundhouse to travel right past her. The girl seemed surprised by this and was momentarily off-balance, so without even thinking of her movements Leona continued her motion and struck with a palm at the girl's upper arm, further pushing her off balance and leaving her wide open for a second strike aimed for the girl's kidney, striking with just enough force to disable a normal opponent.

To her astonishment this girl shrugged off the blow, turning to look in astonishment at Leona, and then another second later her anger arose once again and she threw a second, more powerful punch in her direction. This time Leona had no chance of avoiding her, for the fist moved with blinding speed, and when it hit her there was an explosion of stars and Leona went flying, landing in the water again and barely able to retain consciousness.

"Akane!" she heard the redhead cry as Leona sputtered and fought against the urge to just let the current take her, "Akane stop! Don't hurt her! She didn't do anything to you..."

"DIDN'T DO ANYTHING?" the girl cried out, "She hit me!"

"Yeah?" Ukyo challenged, "Well, you hit her back a lot harder, and as usual you didn't even wait to hear any explanations!"

"What is there to explain?" Akane growled, "This is all your fault, Ranma! How dare you defend her against me! Haven't you got any thought about my feelings?"

The cat hissed on Ukyo's shoulders and looked ready to claw the shorthaired girl, but all this did was cause the redhead to shudder once again and move away from Ukyo.

Leona swam back to the side of the canal and climbed out of the water, feeling tired and sore and hoping she'd heal back real soon because if felt as though her jaw had been broken. The bones snapped into place even as she thought this, and Leona flexed it several times before daring to risk talking again, all the while listening as a shouting match erupted between Ukyo and Akane.

"Why can't you ever wait to hear his side before you attack him?"

"What side is that, yours?"

"We were attacked by this guy who was trying to kill us and Ranma came to our rescue!"

"It was probably his fault you guys were attacked! He's always to blame every time this happens!"

"That's no true! Ranchan never starts anything, it's always somebody else who comes after him, like you for example!"

"I only hit him when he deserves it! If he wasn't such a baka...!"

"And if you weren't such a stupid, stuck-up little witch...!"

"Guys!" the redhead pleaded, "Don't fight over me! Akane, I'll go along quietly, just don't do anything with Ucchan this time, please?"

"Oh yeah, I see she lost that spatula she always likes to fight with. What's the matter, afraid to fight without it?"

"I could break you in half with one hand tied behind my back..."

"Prove it! Let's settle this once and for all..."

Leona straightened her shoulders, turned to confront the bickering youths, took a deep breath and cried out, "[ALL RIGHT, THAT'S ENOUGH! I'VE HAD IT!]"

Everyone turned to look at her in surprise, but Leona was not in the mood to listen to any more petty argument, especially from the shorthaired girl with the attitude. In two stride she got right in the face of that girl and made full use of her extra few inches of height to lean forward and say, "[You got a problem with that mouth of yours, lady? Because we got a real serious problem after us and all you can do is stand around here causing an argument? What the hell is your damage?]"

Akane blinked her eyes, taken aback by the fury in this gaijin girl's tone of voice, who looked nearly as angry as Akane herself usually was around Ranma.

"[And you...]" Leona hesitated as she stared at the redhead, trying to match her with the boy she had seen before and failing badly as there was only the most superficial resemblance (except for the blue eyes, which were disturbingly unchanged), "[You got some kind of a death wish hanging around with this bitch? Take a tip from me and steer clear of the walking attitude because she's nothing but trouble, believe me!]"

"[What you call me?]" Akane asked in a passable attempt at English, "[I no can believe you said that...!]"

"[I do,]" Ukyo said flawlessly, "[And she's got you pegged to a Tee, not that you could understand it!]"

The cat on Ukyo's shoulder made a low noise, and once again the redhead flinched, hesitating before saying in English, "[Whatever.]"

Leona was about to continue when her anger started to falter. She really was over her head in all of this and knew that she was intruding into the personal affairs of these youths without a clue as to what was really going on here. She was about to apologize for momentarily losing her temper when the feeling came over her again, the unmistakable sense of centuries marching over her grave, and she knew without question that the enemy had caught up with them, which was why she looked up and said, "[Guys?]"

"Uh-oh," the redhead said as she looked past Akane up the side of the bank where they all turned to find the swordsman from before standing there with blade drawn and at the ready.

"Well, well," he sounded amused, "This gets better all the time. All three fianc es together in one place, and the notorious Saotome Ranma in cursed form."

"Cursed form?" Leona wondered if those words meant what she thought they meant, though magic was the most logical explanation for why there was a redhead that everyone else seemed to be calling Ranma.

"What do you want?" Ukyo called out, "We're no threat to you!"

"That is quite correct, Kuonji-san," the swordsman replied, "You are not a threat to me at all, but I love a good challenge, and hunting the likes of you is the best sport that I have enjoyed in ages."

"Man, you're full of it," Ranma said defiantly, assuming an aggressive stance before leaping forward to attack.

The man smiled and calmly waited until Ranma was within a meter of himself, then his sword moved as he stepped to one side. Ranma landed on the concrete edge of the canal, then staggered and pitched forward. The man calmly turned around with the sword in his hand trailing blood, and in a matter-of-fact tone said, "I am not some witless fool like Kuno Tatewaki, boy, whom you could take for granted. I am a true Samurai, and your ignorance will be your undoing."

Leona started running as she reached up and drew her sword back from its scabbard, realizing that she would never be able to cross the distance in time to save the redhead from a beheading as the man calmly lifted his blade over his head and prepared to deliver the finishing stroke, while Ukyo cried out, "RANMA!"

"This is the end for you, Boy!" Tonada declared, "So ends the career of the great Saotome Ranma!"

The cat launched itself from Ukyo's shoulders while Akane stood stunned in disbelief, unable to take in the sight of her iinazuke being so easily defeated. Ranma beaten by a man with a weapon? Unthinkable! He was Saotome Ranma, and he was never, ever truly defeated!

Fortunately Ukyo was not similarly paralyzed as her hands went to her bandoleer and came away with a double handful of her trademark spatulas, which she sent flying in less than a heartbeat. The man reacted to the threat by deflecting the blades with his own weapon, which gave Leona the chance to reach the top of the canal in time to interpose herself between the swordsman and the bleeding Ranma.

"Fool!" Tonada cried as he started to lash out at her, and Leona knew she was overmatched as she stood her ground and parried the first slash, only to be driven to her knees by the second, which was followed by a stab to her shoulder that caused her arm to lock up as her fingers lost their grip on her sword blade.

Before he could follow up on her moment of weakness the cat was suddenly in the man's face slashing away with paws that moved like a blur, causing the man to cry out and feebly attempt to pry her off of himself. The animal had clearly gone berserk in its desire to tear the man's face to shreds, and Tonada had no choice but to back away while one hand gripped the cat by the neck, and with great effort he yanked her off and threw her to the side, one eye gouged and severely bleeding.

Before he had a chance to renew his assault, though, the trembling sensation of another Immortal caused him to break off and glance around, his single good eye making out the approach of a white haired apparition, which still was far enough away to only vaguely comprehend at a distance. Leona knew this sensation very well, however, for she had lived with this resonance for the better part of two years, and she smiled in relief that almost made her forget about the pain in her shoulder.

"Another time," Tonada said, realizing that he was in no shape for another encounter as he needed the time it would take to heal before he could face the woman who was approaching...especially it she turned out to be who he feared that she must be. There was no mistaking that confident, arrogant stride, that bearing of command so rarely found in women, the total mastery of her body and spirit that marked the approach of a true warrior, so he heeded his instincts of self-preservation and ran from the place that had nearly marked Ranma's execution, hoping that she would not pursue as her natural inclination was to help the injured.

"Erin!" Leona called out, only to see the grim look in her mentor's eyes, which caused Leona to shudder a little, knowing intuitively that she was in for a royal ass chewing."

"Erin?" Ukyo asked as she and Akane climbed up the side of the canal, "How did you find us?"

"A little bird told me," Erin continued walking until she came upon Ranma, at which point she knelt down and examined the redheaded girl, turning her over as Ranma had passed out while trying to hold her insides together. Erin noted this and said, "Definitely a Saotome...nobody else in their right mind attacks a Samurai bare-handed."

"Will Ranma be all right?" Akane asked, just beginning to come out from her shock over what had happened.

"She's passed out from loss of blood, but I think I can help her," Erin replied, pulling a belt-knife from concealment and slashing her own palm.

"What are you doing?" Ukyo asked the silver haired woman.

"You see," Leona replied, knowing what was about to happen.

Erin spoke a few low low-voiced words as she placed her hand over the slash in the redhead's belly, and slowly a slight shimmering effect traveled down her arm to affect the wounded area, and in seconds the wound began closing. A moment later color returned to Ranma's cheeks and she moaned very softly, murmuring faintly, "W-Where am I?"

"Meow?" the cat asked from close beside the redhead, startling her into partially sitting up.

"Gah-a cat!" Ranma tried to get up and away but Erin restrained her with a hand to her shoulder.

"Not so fast, you young scallion," Erin said gruffly, "You need to rest and recover your strength. Not to mention replace the blood you lost, which even for a Saotome is going to take some minutes."

"How did you do that?" Ukyo asked in low wonder.

"A little trick I learned a long time ago when I spent time with the Amazons of China," Erin replied, "Of course it helps if you've got the Quickening in your veins..."

"Pig-tailed girl!" a voice cried out in dismay.

"Oh Kami, not him!" Ranma winced as Tatewaki Kuno came running up to join them, distress plain upon his visage.

"Pig-tailed girl, what has befallen thee?" Kuno asked as he slowed until he hovered above Ranma.

"It's nothing you should worry about, Kuno-san," Ukyo replied, when Erin suddenly glanced at the youth sharply.

"Kuno?" she asked, rising to her full height, "Your name is Kuno?"

"Kuno Tatewaki, at your service," Kuno bowed, "And you are...Erin of the family of O'Shea, are you not?"

"Thought it might be you," Erin nodded slowly, "You've grown a bit since last we met."

"While you have only grown more lovely with the passage of the seasons," Kuno turned to notice the blood pooled around Ranma and cried out, "Pig-tailed one! Who had dared to profane your perfect form..."

"This I need?" Ranma rolled her eyes, again trying to sit up, but Erin waved a finger in her direction.

"Uh-uh-uh, young lady!" Erin warned, "Not until you've rested! We need to find you a place where you can recover your health while I hear the details over all that's happened," she turned a look towards Leona that promised that there would, indeed, be an accounting, "Young Lord Kuno, I wonder if I may impose upon you by asking you to carry my patient until she is strong enough to walk on her own."

"HEY!" Ranma cried out in protest.

"It would be my honor to carry her to the ends of the Earth, if needs be," Kuno replied, and then he scooped Ranma into his arms before anyone could stop him, "Lead on, I say, to the place where my true love can be healed of her afflictions."

"The only affliction I want removed is you!" Ranma said as she tried to pry herself loose from the young Samurai, to no avail as her strength was less than equal tot he task.

"The rest of you, follow me," Erin said in a tone that brooked no contradiction.

"I know a place where we can go," Ukyo said as she picked the cat up and began stroking her fur, "It should still be open, provided the old ghoul hasn't yet skipped back to China."

"Then you may act as guide," Erin said, "And I'll keep watch to see that Tonada doesn't trouble you people again."

"You know that jerk?" Akane asked.

"Erin know lots of people," Leona assured her.

"Indeed I do," Erin said grimly as she once again fingered her cane, "And some of them are still living, though he won't be for long if he tries again on my Leona."

Even Kuno seemed affected by that statement, though few words were exchanged as they left the area and headed towards the Nekohanten. As she fell in step alongside her mentor, Leona murmured in tones that only the two of them could hear, "[I'm sorry if you're mad at me, Erin...]"

"[Mad doesn't begin t'cover it, Luv," Erin replied in the same low level, "[But we'll talk about it later. I know what you did and why you wanted to do it and we'll leave it like that, but at least now you know the danger O' wandering through strange areas unattended.]"

"[Right,]" Leona replied sheepishly, while wondering what Erin knew that she did not know and how she had so quickly identified the redhead as Saotome Ranma. She knew without it needing to be pointed out to her that this strange day was far from over, and that the explanation-when it came-was bound to be a doozy.

She only hoped that the next time she ran into that Tonada that she was better armed and prepared to deal with him, preferably with a Law Rocket, RPG and-or a Bazooka...

Continued.

Comments/Criticisms/Centennial History Lessons: shadowmane

What connection does Erin have with the town of Nerima, and who else does she remember on a first-named basis? And what of the villain of this piece...do you think he'll give up this easy? More answers next time in the third chapter...so kindly be there, or we'll make you eat some of Akane's cooking! -_-

X

If you wish to check out my other works, Please check out my Fanfiction webpage at: . or it's mirror site at: ~ All related chapters of this series can be found there along with my other works.


	3. Chapter 3

IMNerima3

Ill Met in Nerima

By Jim Robert Bader

(Inspired by the works of Rumiko Takahashi and the creators of the Highlander Series)

Part Three.

"[This is the place?]" Leona asked as she saw the exterior of a restaurant that bore a sign whose lettering she could not translate, but for the smiling Kitty symbol.

"[Sure is, Sugar,]" Ukyo replied, "[The Cat Caf , Shampoo's place of residence and employment, until recently. It's closing down since her Great Grandmother is moving back to China, but she should still be around and be willing to help us.]"

The cat that had been riding Ukyo's shoulder got down suddenly and leaped up to a hidden door panel that was just large enough for it to slip through without effort. Leona noted this and wondered if it were some sort of trained animal, because it certainly behaved in a surprisingly intelligent manner.

"[Old ghoul is handful, but she helps more than not,]" said Ranma-chan is a passable attempt at English, "[No let looks fool you, she very dangerous, and fast for years.]"

"[If she's an Amazon Elder, then she's probably well trained in their method O' life prolongation,]" Erin remarked, "[Age is a sign of wisdom and respect t'the Amazons, mainly 'cause anyone who lives long enough t'collect a pension must be tougher than your average ol' buzzard.]"

"[But not as old as you?]" Akane asked the very tall warrior woman.

"[Leona says that you're both Immortal, Erin-chan,]" Ukyo glanced at the silver-  
haired woman, "[And Shampoo called you the Undying.]"

"[There are a lot O' stories about our kind,]" Erin glanced back at Leona with an accusing expression, "[Trust ye t'blab all about it first chance ye get. Thought ye knew how to keep a secret better than that, luv.]"

"[Hey, it wasn't like it was my idea to have him stab me,]" Leona protested, "[It hurts, y'know.]"

"[Immortal?]" Tatewaki Kuno glanced at Erin, who was taller than even himself by a good few inches, "[Thou art as a Goddess then, fair lady Erin?]"

"[I wouldn't be goin' that far,]" Erin shrugged, "[But 'tis true that I be moren' I seem. I was born in t'year 41 AD, two years afore Claudius Caesar brought his legions across th' channel t'make us part O' his empire. I fought beside Queen Boadicea at the Battle O' Camlan an' was killed along wi' most O' my clan and people, but I didn't die. Instead I lived on t'suffer slavery an' worse, but O'er th' years I've managed t'do fair by meself, as Leona can assure ye.]"

"[Heh, got that right!]" Leona snorted.

"[You two thousand year old?]" Ranma-chan asked skeptically, "[You don't look it.]"

"[Why thank ye, Lass,]" Erin grinned sidelong, "[Or should I be callin' ye 'Young Master?']"

"[Surely you are most confused, fair one,]" Tatewaki replied, "[Any fool can see that this radiant flower is of the fairer persuasion and is my truest love, exempting only the fair Tendo Akane.]"

"[Gee,]" Akane snorted, "[Don't I feel privileged?]"

"[Which remind me,]" Ranma-chan narrowed her blue eyes as she glanced from Erin to Tatewaki, "[How come you two know each other? You meet before?]"

"[In a manner O' speaking,]" Erin replied, giving Tatewaki a slow appraisal, "[Though when last I saw ye, lad, ye were but a wee urchin playin' at Samurai games.]"

"[As I recall, fair maiden,]" Kuno replied, "[It was you who gave me some of my earliest lessons in sword craft.]"

"[That I did at that,]" Erin smiled, "[An' look at ye now, a young lord fit'n proper.]"

"[You mean it your fault Kuno is so baka about swordplay?]" Akane asked in a tone of almost accusation.

"[Lady, you nuts!]" Ranma-chan agreed.

"[Actually,]" Erin replied, "[I was hired as a governess for the Kuno mansion and instructed to teach Kuno Godai's children about English Literature. Being something O' a foremost expert on th' subject, havin' spoken th' language afore th' Canterbury Tales were e'en written...]"

"[Not that you could tell with your accent,]" Leona snorted.

"[I'm nae the one with th' accent, luv,]" Erin winked, "[Not me fault if ol' Oxford's brand O' English became th' coin O' th' realm.]"

"[So what was the deal with that guy, and why was he after you, Erin?]" Ukyo asked her, just as the door slid open and Shampoo was revealed to be standing there in a different pantsuit than the one she was wearing earlier.

"Great Grandmother no seem to be home at moment," Shampoo said in Japanese, "Shampoo think we have place to ourselves until she get back."

"It'll do, Sugar," Ukyo nodded with a pleasant smile, "Long as those of us who got wet can find a place to dry our stuff out."

"And some hot water!" Ranma-chan averred with sincere conviction.

"[The fair Chef had an equally fair question that she did ask you, Erin-san," Tatewaki pointed out, "[Why did some foul miscreant dare to assault the one whom I love as well as your apprentice?]"

"[Ah, that,]" Erin remarked with a sigh as they filed into the empty restaurant, "[From the dawn of time we Immortals have walked among ye, silently flowing through th' pages O' history, waiting until th' time when th' Gatherin' will occur, when th' few O' us who are left will fight t'th death for the Prize that will make one O' us a god among mortals...]"

"[The gathering?]" Ukyo repeated.

"['Tis a myth, O' course, like the Biblical Armageddon,]" Erin shrugged, "[Can't ever really occur seein' how new Immortals are born every year t'replace th' ones who perish. Some wag thought it up t'account for th' urge some O' us have t'play th' Game, as we Immortals call it. Since there's only one way for us t'die, an' only an Immortal can absorb th' quickening O' another Immortal...]"

"[In other words that guy wanted my head so he could take my quickening,]" Leona explained, "[It would make him more powerful than he was before...not that I've lived long enough to have that much experience for him to absorb, of course.]"

"[Take your head?]" Ranma-chan unconsciously swallowed.

"[There are but three types of Immortals in th' world,]" Erin explained, "[Th' first kind are the Unquickened...those who were born with the Quickening within 'em, only in a dormant, which is where we all begin, no different than ye lot an' th' rest O' ordinary mortals. When an Unquickened Immortal dies the quickening becomes active, an' they stop agin', able to live on indefinitely with perfect health an' th' ability t' regenerate wounds no matter how severe. Immortals then have a choice t'either join in the game or t'avoid it as much as they're able. If they be good or bad people, then they be Good or Evil Immortals, an' in the latter case we find Tonada Shinji, a Koga Ninja who betrayed his own clan t' that scoundrel, Nobunaga, only t'sell him out when he joined Tokugawa an' helped form th' Shogunate that ruled Japan for th' better part of three centuries.]"

"[A Ninja?]" Leona gasped, "[That guy was a Ninja?]"

"[He is an honorless cur undeserving of the name Samurai!]" Tatewaki declared in outrage, "[And if he dares come after thee again, then I, Kuno Tatewaki, shall smite him with the vengeance of heaven!]"

Leona blinked her eyes to this and leaned over to murmur to Ukyo and Akane, "[Does this guy always talk like this?]"

"[Unfortunately,]" Ukyo replied with a sigh.

Leona turned to Erin and said, "[You taught this guy both English and swordsmanship?]"

"[Seemed like a fair idea at the time,]" Erin shrugged.

"[Lady,]" Ranma-chan said, "[You crazy!]"

"[I be Celtic,]" Erin replied, "[We be all a lil' mad'n our own way.]"

"[Whatever,]" Ranma-chan shrugged, "[I go get hot water.]"

He started to turn towards the kitchen area when Shampoo spoke up, "Shampoo get you hot water, Ranma. Is already heated on stove. Great Grandmother no shut down gas yet."

"Ah, sure..." Ranma-chan said reluctantly, then watched as the girl all but bounced out of the room in a semblance of her old enthusiasm.

"[Wow,]" Leona said before shifting back to Japanese, "She sure eager please you. You sure you want this one instead of her?"

"Hey!" both Ukyo and Akane said at almost the same instant.

"She's an Amazon," Erin mused in a thoughtful voice, "Way I hear it, you defeated her in her village, then later did it again here in Japan. By the laws of her society she owes you her hand in marriage."

"That's got nothing to do with me," Ranma-chan sighed, "She's a nice girl and all that, but I kinda have a problem with what she turns into..."

"The Nekoken," Erin replied with a knowing expression.

"The what?" Leona asked, wondering if she understood right a word that sounded like "Cat-Fist."

"It's a forbidden technique of the Saotome Ryu," Erin explained, "I heard about it, of course, though I'm finding it a bit daft to think even Genma would be so reckless as to tie his only son up in fish sausages and throw him into a pit of starving cats."

"HE WHAT?" Leona blurted as she turned an appalled look towards the female Ranma.

"It's not like I wanna talk it or nothin'," Ranma-chan responded gruffly, "But the Old Man really did a number on my head, which is why I can't even stand to look at the critters, and because Shampoo..."

Leona recalled the way the redheaded girl had flinched away from the almost drowned cat that had been clinging to Ukyo's shoulders and started to put two and two together. Before she could complete the mental equation, though a voice from out in back cried, "STUPID MOUSSE! SHAMPOO TELL YOU NEVER BOTHER HER AGAIN, BUT YOU NO LISTEN!"

There were sounds of a brief struggle, and then a longhaired boy in flowing white robes came crashing through the menu slot linking the counter area to the kitchen, crashing into the dining room area and landing in a heap, where he lay groaning on the floor for several moments.

Ranma-chan heaved a sigh and said, "He's still bothering you again?"

Leona saw a lividly angry Shampoo heaving deep breaths in the doorway to the kitchen, looking mad enough to spit nails at any second. With great effort she got her temper back under control, then lifted her nose with a contemptuous sniff and stalked around the fallen youth to present a kettle to the redheaded Ranma.

"The impudent cur," Tatewaki snorted, "How dare he try and force himself once again upon a lady who wants not his affections?"

"Look whose talking," Akane glared in his direction.

"Mousse no get message, Shampoo keep telling him, but he no listen," she said as Ranma-chan poured the contents of the kettle over her head, "Want force Shampoo, say is for own good, but Shampoo no want him!"

Leona gasped in amazement as she saw the redhead fill out and grow taller while her hair shifted from red to black, and suddenly the blue-eyed Ranma was standing there again, handing the kettle back with a sheepish look at Shampoo.

"Saotome!" Tatewaki all at once cried out in anger, "What have you done with my Osage no Onna?"

The young man drew his bokken once again and charged at Ranma, who did not even turn around as his fist went flying in well-directed side-punch that knocked the taller boy to the floor, momentarily stunned as Leona looked at him in a mixture of disbelief and pity.

"Did he just watch you change and call you somebody else?" Leona asked in amazement.

"Kuno's like that, Sugar," Ukyo sighed, "Lives in his own little world where he's a valiant samurai and Ranchan's a wicked sorcerer who steals away his beloved Pigtailed Girl and holds her hostage to his evil power...or at least that's how he put it everything he gets beaten."

"The lad is clearly not right in the head," Erin mused, "I suspect it has something to do with having witnessed his mother's suicide many years back. I lived with the Kunos a few months and I saw enough of Hitome to know that she was headed for a serious breakdown...but nobody listened to me when I said she needed professional help," she sighed, "They never listen."

Mousse groaned and began to recover his bearings, "Saotome, you swine! You dare come back here after what you've done to Shampoo?"

"I ain't done nothing to Shampoo, you Baka," Ranma said in disgusted tones as the Chinese boy began to recover his bearings, "She just doesn't want you, so stop blaming me for your relationship problems..."

"It's not that, you idiot!" Mousse snarled, now clearly livid with anger, "By refusing her you've doomed Shampoo into exile! Now she has no name or identity back home and her family will cease to pretend that she's even a person, all because you and in your pride cast aside her affections!"

"Wh-What?" Ranma looked stunned at this accusation, "What are you saying? What about Shampoo?"

"It's true!" Mousse glared hatefully in their direction, "Tell him! If you don't care about me, at least tell him!"

"Shampoo?" Ranma turned to the Amazon, who was staring disconsolately at the floor and not meeting his expression.

"DIE!" Mousse cried out, his hands suddenly a blur as the air between them became filled with blurring objects.

"Look out!" Ukyo cried as she whipped her spatula into place, barely in time to deflect a number of the thrown objects, while Shampoo leaped ahead and her hands started to blur to intercept the others. One that got past their guard whipped by Erin's head, only to be caught by her at the last second. Unfortunately for Leona she was no where near as fast as these three, and she felt a meaty chunk hit her in the gut, momentarily driving the wind out of her sails.

"[N-Not again,]" she gasped as she collapsed to the floor, sporting a knife in her bosom.

"W-What...?" Ranma turned to see the brunette go down, still reeling from the impact of Mousse's accusation and only belatedly glad to discover that the one who had been knifed was not Akane, who was staring down at the other girl with a mutely horrified expression.

But then a white haired blur shot past them all, and all at once Mousse was slammed up against the far wall, suspended above the floor by an iron hand whose fingers threatened to crush his windpipe like a soda can. With seemingly no effort on her part Erin held him kicking above the floor before touching the side of his head with the butt end of her walking staff. There was murder in her eyes that belied the deceptive calm of her words as she said, "Laddie...you should not have done that..."

"Is that fool causing troubles again?" a dry, withered voice inquired, and Leona gasped as she saw an even more withered old gnome standing at the base of a stairway near the kitchen area of the restaurant. Her eyes narrowed a bit as she took in the tall Celt and then in tones of odd emotion she said, "Erin O'Shea, as I live and breathe. I thought I recognized your voice from somewhere?"

"Eh?" Erin turned a puzzled look towards the old woman, "Have we met before, Elder?"

"It was many lifetimes ago," the old woman replied, "I've changed...more than you have, or so it would appear."

"Ah...well," Erin said sheepishly, ignoring the frantic way that Mousse was trying to loose her hand about his neck and was starting to turn an interesting shade of purple, "I get by, more-or-less. Been a while since I been anywhere near Amazon territory..."

"I should well imagine," the old woman said as she hopped onto the top of a gnarled wooden staff and balanced there without apparent effort, and even as pained as Leona was, she could sense something powerful within the frail seeming form of the old biddy, "The fool whom you are in the process of sending to meet his unworthy ancestors is no friend of mine or my house, but I think it would be for the best if you permit him to breathe as I'm sure your young apprentice will be fine enough, provided someone takes that dagger out of her body."

"Oh...yeah," Ranma leaned down and pulled the knife loose from the gasping Leona, who arched her back and groaned in relief, and a moment later she said, "Gah...I hate when that happens..."

"[Feelin' better, luv?]" Erin asked Leona.

"[I'll live,]" Leona replied, "[Uh...Erin? You can let the guy live now. He ain't one of us, you know.]"

"[Oh,]" Erin replied as if she had momentarily forgotten about the boy whom she was choking, letting him fall to the floor gasping for wind as she turned her back towards him as though dismissing him from her thoughts.

"Sorry about that," Ranma said as continued kneeling beside Leona, "Mousse doesn't see so good, so he must have mistook you for me..."

"Like that better?" Leona slowly sat up and examined her shirt, "[Geez! I'm never gonna get all this blood out of my shirt...]"

"[Considering the alternative,]" Ukyo mused, "[I'd call you pretty lucky.]"

"[Luck like this I can do without,]" Leona said, then accepted Ranma's hand as he helped her get back to her feet once again.

"Hey!" Akane growled, swatting Ranma on the arm, very hard.

"Ow!" Ranma flinched, "What did you do that for?"

"You're being a pervert again!" Akane accused him, "What, four women isn't enough for you? You've got to pick up another girlfriend?"

"What are you talking about?" Ranma asked, "I was just being friendly."

"You were just being a pervert!" she all but shouted, and her hand was forming a fist as she drew back to swing at him, only Erin caught her by the wrist and held her fist immobile.

"Let me go!" Akane growled and tried to wrest herself free, but the taller Gaijin woman easily disabled her with an Aikido move, then yanked Akane down into a chair and compelled her to sit.

"None of that Lass," Erin said in a stern voice that brooked no contradiction, "You hold still or I'll make this far less pleasant than it has to be."

"What are you doing?" Ukyo asked.

"Trying to confirm a suspicion," Erin replied as she ran her fingers through Akane's hair while standing directly behind the surprised Tendo girl, probing the skin on the outside with a studied, neutral expression.

"You're not trying to use the Xi Fang Giao on her, are you?" Ranma asked in suspicion.

"Hardly," Erin retorted, only after a minute she began feeling a particular area and said, "There...that's what I was after. There's a raised bump here signifying a slight distortion in this area. Elder, back me up on this...isn't this the spot that signifies an imbalance in the Limbic system of the brain stem?"

The old woman leaned forward and said, "That is one of the symptoms, yes. I see you've studied Phrenology in addition to Amazon Pressure Point training."

"One of my many hobbies," Erin replied, "I'd need a Magnetic Resonance Imaging scan to confirm it, but at a guess I'd say that there's a slight swelling either in or around the Amygdala, possibly the Hippocampus as well, impacting on the Septal area and Cingulate Cortex, the parts of the brain that process cognitive information in the emotional structures..."

"What are you saying?" Ukyo asked, "That Akane has brain damage?"

Shampoo made a rude noise, "That no hard to figure out, even Shampoo know that."

"It would seem that our young Miss Tendo suffers from an extreme inability to regulate her emotions and process information without confusing the data, which would explain her increasing inability to handle stress without resorting t excessive levels of violence."

"Can you fix it?" Ranma asked in obvious worry.

"The human brain isn't like repairing a clock, Laddie," Erin replied, "This is delicate work, even by the standards of modern medicine. At best I could prescribe treatment using modern drugs that suppress emotional stress levels, but to actually correct the damage is beyond my limited skills. Perhaps the Elder might recommend a skilled healer from her village?"

"My granddaughter, Comb, is a healer," the old woman replied, "As is her aunt, a fellow elder named Lilac. I could send for them, of course, provided her parents allow me."

"What are you talking about?" Akane protested, shaking off Erin's probing fingers, "I don't have any problem! I feel just fine!"

"Tendo-san," Erin said gently, "Regardless of what you think you feel, the fact of the matter is that you are a very sick little girl who needs the proper sort of treatment."

"That's not true!" Akane protested.

"You have a dissociate disorder relating to the way your brain processes emotional data, and it's affecting the way you think and perceive the world. You've already demonstrated to me how even slight levels of stress can set off your rages. I suspect you were affected by something when you were still a small girl and it has caused a portion of your brain to malfunction steadily over time, no doubt made worse by more recent events related to this engagement of yours, which is causing everybody so much trouble."

"It's not true!" Akane was almost in tears, "Why are you doing this to me..."

"Leave her alone," Ranma protested, only to have Erin's green-eyed stare fall on him with a particularly nasty intensity that was mirrored in her expression.

"You're a part of the problem, Lad," Erin said sternly, "Regardless of whose idea it was to engage you to Tendo-san, the fact that you can't seem to help upsetting her in making her condition far worse than it would be if left on her own. Tell me, do you do or say anything that might either upset her or have the potential of making her feel upset to an excessive level?"

"Ah...well..." Ranma hesitated.

"Don't blame it all on Ranchan," Ukyo defended, "It's not his fault that Akane's got such a crummy temper."

"I do not!" Akane protested.

"You very stubborn, very angry girl," Shampoo sniffed, "Shampoo feel very sorry for Ranma he marry you. You pound him into paste no matter Ranma try getting along with you or now."

"I'm afraid marriage is out for you, at least until after you have the proper treatment," Erin replied, "If merely being engaged upsets you this much, I don't even want to know the kinds of effects that marriage will have on you, Tendo-  
san. What kind of an idiot would force you two to get married at such a tender age anyway? You're barely out of high school!"

"Their fathers," the old woman replied.

Erin paused a moment to think on that, then said, "Okay, so it was a stupid question..."

"You're saying we don't get married just now...but maybe we could later?" Ranma shrugged, "I could live with that."

"Ranma!" Akane's voice held shock, betrayal and accusation all at the same time.

"Look Akane," Ranma tried saying reasonably, "Even I can tell you got a real problem with your emotions. It don't mean we can't get married, you just have to get well and then we could..."

"I don't believe you!" Akane almost screamed in his face, "You'd accept any excuse to dump me in favor of Ukyo and Shampoo! Well fine, if you want them so much, then you can have them!"

Leona sighed, sensing the girl was tensing up for another attack. This was going to hurt at lot, but..."

She moved forward and deliberately placed herself between Akane and her intended target, wincing as she saw the fist loom up in her vision again, only to halt short by the space of mere inches.

Erin's hand was firmly gripping the short haired girl by the upper forearm, preventing it from traveling forward, and then with her other hand she pinched the Tendo girl on the neck, causing Akane to lose consciousness and begin slumping towards the floor, only Erin caught her and laid her down upon a table.

Ranma heaved a sigh of relief before saying, "Thank you. Will Akane be all right?"

"Difficult to know for certain," Erin replied, "Her condition might be treatable, but a full cure will doubtlessly take time and a lot of patience. I suspect the lass has issues far more personal than even her odd mix of love and hate that's being directed towards you, lad. Of a certainly this is not the sort of complex that spontaneously cures itself. I suspect the real problem, though, will be in convincing those two idiots that you lot have the misfortune of calling your fathers. If they're anything like I remember when I last met them almost twenty years ago..."

"Take my word on it," the old woman said, "They're much worse."

"That's what I was afraid of," Erin sighed, "By the way...just for the record, whatever happened to those other suitors who were always vying for their attention? Which ones finally won out?"

"Huh?" Ranma blinked, "What do you mean other suitors?"

"You mean there was more than one woman who wanted to marry Ranchan's father?" Ukyo asked.

"Aiyaa," Shampoo exclaimed, "No think any woman could be that desperate!"

Ranma looked at the Amazon girl at his side, then asked, "What was Mousse going on about a minute ago about you being forced into exile?"

Shampoo glanced away and the old woman said nothing.

"It's about honor and status in their society, Lad," Erin gently replied, "When an Amazon warrior is defeated by an outsider male, she has to marry him or suffer a considerable loss in status among her people. If the man who should be legally her husband repeatedly rejects her, then she is considered unworthy of anyone else's attention. You've been rejecting her for two years, as I've been led to believe...and at that point the options open to her are pretty grim...either death or exile."

"N-Nani?" Ranma's face suddenly drained of color.

"Death?" Leona gasped, "[That's pretty extreme, doncha think?]"

"It's the way of the Amazons, luv," Erin said sadly, "Their customs date back to prehistoric times when they were a bronze age band of Scythian nomads. It may seem cruel to the likes of us, but then again, my own people had some pretty harsh customs of our own, so who am I to pass judgement."

"Indeed," the old woman said in calculating tones, "If memory serves right, there was considerable scandal about your relationship with one of our more promising warriors, Iceni."

"Ah...well..." Erin said uncomfortably, "It's different with women outsiders, as you well know. The options there are either death or marriage, depending on whether the warrior gives the Kiss of Life or Death to the outsider woman who defeats her."

"I'm so glad that you remember that part," the old woman paused before adding, "Outsider woman."

There was a long drawn out pause before Erin turned a rather strained look at the old woman, who gazed back with an expression that only barely contained a wealth of emotions heretofore never witnessed by those who thought they knew her. Then in a very hesitant, uncertain voice, Erin tentatively asked, "Kho Lon? I-Is that you, luv?"

"Who did you think it was after almost three hundred years?" Kho Lon said levelly, "I may have changed on the outside, but I still remember the warrior who dressed like a man when she came strutting into our village seeking directions...Airen."

"Airen?" Ukyo started.

"Great Grandmother?" Shampoo asked in confusion.

"You've gotta be kidding!" Ranma said in disbelief.

"I don't believe this," Leona growled, her expression darkening as she looked from her mentor to the old woman before her. She was sensing great age in the old woman, but nothing like true Immortality. Given that there were many ways to live a long time besides being born with the quickening in your body, it only made sense that one of Erin's former conquests might show up looking like a withered raisin.

"A-heh..." Erin said nervously as she backed away towards the door, "My...what times does with memories, even for us, eh?"

"They say time eases the pain of long separation," Cologne replied as she stalked the tall Iceni with an air of menace in her tone, "Why don't we put that theory to the test...shall we?"

Erin made a break for it, and Cologne followed after her, the two of them all but flying out of the restaurant.

"Aiyaa," Shampoo said softly into the ensuing silence.

"That goes for the both of us," Ukyo agreed before turning to Leona, "Are you going to go after her?"

"[What's the point?]" Leona fumed as she folded her arms beneath her chest, "[No way I can keep up with them, and she probably deserves it.]"

"Boy, does that sound familiar," Ranma turned to glance at the unconscious Akane, then turned to Shampoo and asked, "Why didn't you ever tell me?"

Shampoo looked away again, "Great Grandmother tell Shampoo no tell you, Ranma. She say you think we trick you again. You think maybe Shampoo try make Ranma feel bad about no accepting her...but Shampoo no want Ranma think that. Is like when Shampoo try use magic, it never work out right..."

"You've been holding back on all of us, Sham-chan," Ukyo replied, "I guess you chose exile because you don't want your family back home to know how badly you screwed up with Ranchan."

"Shampoo...like one dead to family," there were tears in the Amazon's eyes, "No can go home without bringing great dishonor on whole house. Great Grandmother lose place on Counsel, no more be leader of out people. Shampoo no can do to her...would rather die first..."

"Ah geeze," Ranma turned to her, "Don't cry like that, Shampoo. I wasn't trying to hurt you or nothing! I only did what I..."

"What you thought was right?" Ukyo asked him, not even bothering to restrain her own feelings of acute hurt, "Rejecting her and me so you could marry Akane? That's right, Ranchan? That's your idea of doing the right thing?"

"Let me see if get this straight," Leona turned to them, "You father big idiot, he make you marry her..." she pointed at Akane, "After he make deal and take Yatai from Ukyo, then abandon her on road, and get you in trouble with her people, right?" she pointed at Shampoo then shook her head, "You crazy!"

"S-Saotome...!" Kuno growled as he tried to force himself back into a siting posture, leaning on his bokken, "You cad! How dare you call yourself a man, you enemy of all women?"

"KEEP OUT OF THIS!" Ukyo, Ranma, Shampoo and Leona all cried at the same time, and between the four of them they sent Tatewaki back into dreamland.

"[You know,]" Leona remarked as she studied her hand, then the unconscious boy, "[I could almost get used to doing that.]"

"Welcome to Nerima," Ranma said with a sad nod of his head, "I just hope you survive it..."

The meeting of Tonada and his clients was an informal one, conducted in the usual way with go-betweens making the actual exchanges. Tonada's own agent, Kojeni, was her usual cool, immaculate self as she hashed out the details of their arrangement, then turned to her client and presented the folder to Tonada for inspection.

"This is the man you are being hired to deal with," Kojeni explained with matter-of-fact, non-nonsense efficiency, "It is for you, My Lord, to decide whether or not to accept the assignment...but Nuguro-san is prepared to be very generous in his terms of employment."

Tonada accepted the folder and opened it, studied the photograph within for a long moment, then smiled, his eyes sparkling with sudden amusement.

"I will take the assignment," Tonada replied, "At half my usual fee."

"My Lord?" Kojeni barely managed to restrain the degree of surprise-bordering outright shock-that was in her voice, for her client was known for a great many qualities, but generosity was not even on the full list.

"This case presents me with some rare opportunities that I look forward to encountering," Tonada explained, "I don't get many challenges these days, so when I find one it is an experience worth cultivating. Make the proper arrangements, I will begin at once on the assignment."

The Obuyun known simply as Nuguro was both astonished and delighted to be presented with such terms and immediately agreed to pay up-front the full amount for the contract. The deal concluded, Tonada left the room, heading downstairs for the rented vehicle that he had acquired in lieu of his damaged limo. Upstairs the folder he had been handed was placed upon a fireproof plate and burned to ashes so as to leave no trace for future investigators.

Tonada smiled as he considered his target, a rather minor figure in the community who had been an unfortunate witness to something that he doubtless did not even remember having seen, but the Yakuza were brutally efficient in their way and would leave nothing to chance that some clever police investigator might have the target identify the client and place him at a time and position rather inconvenient to the client's legal status. Ordinarily eliminating such a figure would be a very small, unimportant matter that any retainer worthy of his tattoos could attend to.

But this figure did not only have standing in the community, but strong defenders who might get in the way of a regular contract assignment, hence the need for Tonada's "special services," and thus the opportunity that seemed almost like a gift from the heavens being dropped into his lap.

And the best part of all was that the current residence of the target was well known to Tonada, who had been amused for some time to keep track of the unusual happenings taking place in Nerima, and who now saw the chance of killing more than one bird with a single sword slice.

But then fate had always been kind to Tonada, who had probably earned more bad Karma than any house full of Samurai who had ever been in the service of the demon-Daimyo, Nobunaga. Only a ruthless and determined survivor could have escaped the ruin that had befallen the former warlord when Tonada had seen the shifting winds and chose to switch his loyalties to the cause of Ieyasu, one of many such shifts that had served him well throughout a long and eventful life, during which he had kept his blade sharpened.

One more notch to put in his belt...or several notches, as the case might be. Life was good and Tonada was contented.

His mission now determined, the renegade Ninja started up his engine and began to set out for his destination, the Tendo Household...

Continued.

Comments/Criticisms/Call 911 for Nerima: shadowmane

Matters head for a boil as Erin and Cologne come to...an arrangement...and meanwhile the fathers have their hands full with their wrathful children demanding explanations. Can Leona possibly negotiate a way in which everyone can have a happy ending, or will Tonada be the death of all happiness? Find out next time as the battle royale ensues at the Tendo Household...so be there!

X

If you wish to check out my other works, Please check out my Fanfiction webpage at: . or it's mirror site at: ~ All related chapters of this series can be found there along with my other works. 


	4. Chapter 4

IMNerima4

Ill Met in Nerima

By Jim Robert Bader

(Inspired by the works of Rumiko Takahashi and others,  
including the creators and producers of the Highlander series)

Part Four.

"Oh dear," remarked Nodoka as she paused in helping Kasumi with the laundry, "Ranma has been gone for quite a while. I certainly hope nothing bad has happened to him and Akane."

"I'm sure he's just fine, Auntie," Kasumi replied, "Ranma just went to investigate a mysterious explosion over at Ucchan's restaurant. I'm sure it's nothing to be too concerned about, this sort of thing happens all the time around here."

Nabiki paused in her reading to give a sidelong glance at the two domestically inclined women. Had anyone but her beloved Oneechan voiced those sentiments, Nabiki would have considered having them institutionalized out of courtesy. Of course the fact that it was true and things did indeed blow up all the time around Nerima just went to show how widespread and institutionalized insanity could be in some regions.

Of course to Nabiki the very idea of the two preternaturally naturally calm women exchanging such mild sentiments while ignoring a larger domestic crisis seemed more than a little off, not that Nabiki could fathom why those two seemed to take such pleasure out of performing menial housework. At least their behavior could not be classified as pathological, unlike a certain other relation who was presently at the forefront of Nabiki's concerns, and hence the cause for her coyly borrowing one of Kasumi's medical texts that dealt with abnormal mental states.

The part about emotional instability and volatile mood swings was a bit dry for Nabiki's tastes, but at least she was able to follow most of the complicated terminology, making frequent use of Kasumi's medical dictionary to help her with a few of the more esoteric words to further enhance her basic comprehension. What she had come up with so far was a tentative hypothesis that a childhood trauma, coupled with an already previous condition, had led to a gradual erosion of a person's normal ability to respond to and compensate for emotional experiences as a person's ability to cope with ordinary levels of stress might gradually deteriorate to the point where self-control was all but obliterated. External conditions, such as-say-an impending marriage might increase the levels of stress that the individual was under to the point where even minor stimulus could provoke an out-of-all-proportion reaction.

That, at least, seemed to fit the criteria that Nabiki was after, though she would rather have had a competent medical examiner review her findings to see if they held any water. It was alarming to watch someone whom Nabiki cared about gradually become almost a stranger before her very eyes. The period between Akane's explosive rages was diminishing steadily the closer they came to the date of the wedding, and Nabiki was fairly certain that she knew why, considering how the last attempt at marriage had turned out only a year ago...a fact for which Nabiki held no small amount of shame since she had been principally responsible for sabotaging the whole thing.

At the time it had made perfect sense to her to sell those invitations to Akane's rivals, knowing full well that they would come to crash the party. Nabiki had been somewhat incensed by her father's rush to get her little sister hitched up to Ranma. The two had just come off of a harrowing adventure to Phoenix mountain and needed time to adjust to everything that had happened. Ranma's admission of love was too recent for either one of them to be fully adjusted to, and to dump the two of them right into a marriage was the sort of reckless behavior she had come to expect from both her father and Ranma.

So Nabiki arranged to have Ranma's fianc e brigade crash the party then sat back and watched the fireworks occur. What she had not anticipated was the utter desperation that Ukyo and Shampoo would demonstrate in attempting to outright kill Akane...an attempt that she had no doubts was half-hearted on both their parts since neither one was as incompetent at that sort of thing as they appeared to be on the occasion. The fact that part of the Saotome house had been wrecked in the ensuing battle, along with the loss of the all-important Jusenkyo water that might have finally cured Ranma, turned the whole affair into an unmitigated disaster. That nobody laid the blame entirely at Nabiki's feet was something of a minor miracle for which she was altogether very grateful, but still relations between her and Akane had been strained ever since in the year that it had taken their two families to financially recover from the disaster.

Nabiki's upper lip curled in further distaste as she considered her own personal losses resulting from the Wedding fiasco. She had not made a profit from the whole thing as she had anticipated, having sold tickets to their fellow students. Kasumi had convinced her to return what little she had made to the effort of rebuilding the Saotome house, and in the meantime Ranma's family had come to live with them ever since. Pooling resources had managed to pull their combined families out of the doldrums, but for a while it had been a near thing, and Nabiki's ambitious plans for college had to be put on hold in the meantime. Her grades were good enough to get her into two-year University, but without a scholarship tuition she would be unable to pay for business courses that she needed to earn her degree. In the cutthroat world of most major financial institutions, a years delay could be academically fatal and could cost her many a coveted position.

And yet, if what she had just been reading were true, then it was very likely that she might have saved Ranma and Akane from a disaster of epic proportions. True Akane was no doubt anticipating a repeat of the last wedding disaster (even after extracting a promise from Nabiki not to interfere), but if her little sister was going steadily bonkers just with the anticipation of trouble, how would she be able to cope with the actual strains that came with a marriage? Her father and older sister's idiotic belief that things would calm down once they were settled in and adjusted notwithstanding, it was looking more and more like the two teenagers were heading for an impending train wreck, and Nabiki was powerless to do anything to stop it.

Too much energy in her life had been diverted by the comic soap opera of Ranma and Akane, a hapless relationship that Nabiki had long found amusing and diverting, but which now seemed to her less and less funny. She was even starting to wonder at herself for not detecting the signs earlier that Akane had a serious problem which had been left untreated for far too long and was now on the way to becoming a pathological situation. The wake up call for her had been several months ago, when Akane had almost beaten Ranma to death over yet another misunderstanding, and if not for Kasumi's quick action in summoning medical attention it might have resulted in death for the young Saotome.

Nabiki's hands shook as she held the book at an angle so that no one could read the title and draw their own conclusions. That had been her fault, a seemingly harmless prank in which she had snuck into Ranma's room and placed one of Akane's bras in the hand of an exhausted Ranma, who had taken to sleeping in one corner of the dojo while his mother and father took the room that he has long shared with his father. Akane came in that morning to work out, saw Ranma laying there with the incriminating bra, and went instantly ballistic. Nabiki had only heard the result when a loud crashing noise had woken her up that morning, and when she rushed to the window there was Akane pummeling a helpless Ranma in the middle of the yard, screaming obscenities at him until her father and Uncle Genma had arrived to restrain her. Nodoka had managed to calm her down while Kasumi dialed up Doctor Tofu, leaving a half-dressed Nabiki to come running into the yard to check on how Ranma was doing.

The sight of Ranma's normally handsome face beaten black and bloody brought her up short, as did the other signs of physical trauma that Akane had visited upon his body. It took her several long breaths to calm herself down and reassure herself that Ranma was still breathing before she remembered the phenomenal recuperative powers demonstrated by both of the male Saotomes. Ranma would live, she repeated that in her mind over and over as she tried to remember what she knew about First Aid while examining his body, grateful that she would not have to use CPR as there was no telling what Akane would make of mouth-to-mouth resuscitation between herself and Ranma. In her mind Nabiki felt the stabbing guilt of every bruise to Ranma's person, and when Tofu had shown up to do his own examination, Nabiki had hung back and repeated a mantra over and over, "It's all my fault, it's all MY fault! It's all my fault!"

Of course she could have fallen back on the old stand-by position that she had employed many times in the past of blaming Ranma for his own troubles. The macho-jerk had earned a lot of Akane's ire by his constant taunts, insults and complaints about her lack of femininity, and if Akane had fallen into the habit of beating on him in retaliation for this, it was abuse that had become like a conditioned reflex between them, and if Ranma hated it so much then he could have easily stopped doing what he was doing to provoke Akane.

But Ranma was not doing it as often any more. In fact, under his mother's patient guidance he had gradually begun to learn the social skills that he had been lacking for so long due to the influence of his father. Ranma had been trying to act nicer to Akane and insulted her less frequently, which for a time seemed to have the effect of calming Akane down, and for a while it had seemed as though the two of them were indeed maturing and finally growing out of the "awkward" phase of their relationship.

But that illusion crumbled over time as Akane's rage would resurface again and again whenever circumstances set her off like a trigger. It would seem that Akane was all smiles and charm one minute, then would morph from Jeckle into Hyde the next and fly into a berserker state where she saw only Ranma as a target, and anyone else who got in her way was merely a statistic. Before too long Nabiki figured out what the problem was in that Akane had gotten used to using her rage as a crutch for avoiding her problems and was using anger as an outlet for her feelings of inadequacy and depression. When Ranma even accidentally pushed one of her buttons it would set her off and she'd be back to the programmed response that had served her so well in keeping him in line and asserting some control over his behavior.

The clue for Nabiki was in watching how Ranma's parents got along. Though Nodoka might seem to others to be an incredibly gentle and mature woman, she had a temper that she concealed beneath the silky exterior of her overly formal behavior. Whenever Genma stepped out of line (which was frequently) she would reel him in with gentle hints that showed her steel, and not just that katana she always carried around with her. The mere hint of her displeasure was enough to make Genma reconsider all but his most outlandish behavior, and the moment he saw Nodoka begin to draw her sword he was instantly contrite like a faithful puppy.

Nodoka never had to get too angry around him because she knew her husband well and knew how to control him. This was not the case with Akane, who only half-  
understood Ranma but was not willing to let herself understand him too closely. She had a habit of projecting things into Ranma that were not there, such as an exaggerated libido, which no one but Akane seemed able to even conceive about Ranma (if you ignored Nodoka's romantic beliefs that her son was a Don Juan and very "manly" for attracting so many ladies), and so when any of Ranma's other girlfriends paid him the slightest attention, it was proof in Akane's mind that Ranma was being unfaithful.

Case in point, Ukyo, whom Akane feared only slightly less than Shampoo. It was not that the two rival girls were actually a threat to her, but Ukyo got along well with Ranma and the two of them had been childhood friends. Ukyo understood Ranma's faults and accepted them as part of a whole package, while Shampoo was all too willing to accommodate Ranma and dote on him with loving attention and devotion. Akane could not compete with these two girls on either the level of friendship or devotion that they manifested, and that was not even taking into account that those two were arguably more feminine than Akane. For Ranma to spend any time around them was intolerable in Akane's jealous mind, and the mere fact that Ranma preferred to spend more time with Akane in the beginning of their relationship in no way undercut her suspicion that he preferred them to her on some level.

Now Nabiki was faced with the question of what she was going to do about this deteriorating situation. She had considered consulting with both Ukyo and Shampoo, but neither girl seemed all that willing to trust Nabiki, based on their relations in the past, and so she was without apparent allies. In desperation she had even considered consulting with Cologne, but the old woman had been strangely less available lately and very coldly distant the more recent times Nabiki had spoken with her. She was rather uncertain as to why this was, but she had the odd sense that Cologne had given up on her great granddaughter's chances with Ranma and was preparing to return to China. At one time this would have been pleasant news for Nabiki, but now she felt oddly chilled, as if Cologne's leaving Japan heralded darker times in the very near future.

The thrust of Nabiki's thoughts were suddenly disrupted when she heard Ranma's voice call out, "Mister Tendo...I brought some guests home with me. Do you mind, sir?"

Nabiki mused to herself how odd it was to hear Ranma using such formal manners when her strongest image of him was just walking in the door and saying, "Yo!" rather than "Tadaima." She was just speculating on the other changes that she had noticed about him when she froze in the act of turning around. Ranma had indeed brought guests with him, but not just Ukyo, Shampoo and the old woman. There were two odd strangers with them, a dark haired girl with Western features and a much taller gaijin woman whose ice blonde hair and statuesque beauty made her look like an ivory statue come to life.

The next big surprise was hearing both of the fathers gasp in unison, and her own father's hesitant query, "E-Erin? O'Shea Erin?"

Genma held up a sign that formed a huge question mark, under which was lettering that added, "What are you doing back in Nerima?"

Erin raised greenish eyes to regard the fathers levelly, then she said, "Ohiyo, Tendo-san, Saotome-san. It has been a while, eh?"

"Well hello," Nodoka said pleasantly as she came into the room to join them, "Erin O'Shea, it has been a long while! Oh my, you've hardly changed a bit. Is this young one your daughter?"

Nabiki caught a strangled sound from the dark haired girl, but the one called Erin favored her with an amused glance and said, "No, this is my young apprentice, Leona Dubois, from the Americas. Leona, I'd like for you to meet a former student of mine, luv, Tsukino Nodoka..."

"It's Saotome now," Nodoka replied, indicating the Panda playing Shogi, "Of course you know my husband...but do try not to be too alarmed at his current appearance..."

"Yes, I had heard about his trip o Jusenkyo," Erin said with a cunning smile as she added, "I must say, he never looked better...or more hairy for that matter."

That remark earned a narrowing of Genma's panda eyes and instantly won over Nabiki, who liked this Erin O'Shea's humor and would probably enjoy knowing more about their past relations. Erin did not appear to be long out of her teens-  
perhaps the same age as Kasumi-yet there was something mature about the way she carried herself that suggested a greater age than could be read in her features, and she obviously knew Nodoka from the time before she had married. In light of the many bizarre and unusual things that Nabiki had encountered just being around Ranma, she was prepared to accept that this Erin had been around a while longer than she looked, and her command of Japanese was nearly flawless, in spite of a slight accent that was difficult to place, possibly European in origin.

But then Nabiki's eyes fell upon Akane, who was walking listlessly beside Ukyo and Shampoo, and all at once her fears resurfaced because Akane dress seemed travel-worn, with Ukyo hardly looking all that much better. Shampoo had the look of someone who had recently bathed and changed her own clothing, while the girl named Leona had an expression that suggested that her day had not been all that much better.

Ranma was the first to speak, and the words that came out of his mouth did not improve Nabiki's sense of something dire in the offing, "Mister Tendo...Pop...Mom...we need to talk."

"Oh?" Nodoka seemed to also size up Akane's somewhat listless state and was immediately contrite, "What's wrong with Akane? Is everything all right with you, Ranma?"

"No, Nodoka-san," Erin said formally, "Everything is not all right. That's why I'm here to have a chat with you and Tendo-san about his daughter."

"Akane?" Soun stepped forward, "What has happened to my little girl?"

Akane's eyes seemed to focus on her father, but then she looked down again as if unable to find the words.

"That's what we need to talk about," Erin replied, and her tone was nominally gentle but had an unyielding quality to it that made Nabiki pay her even more attention, "Mind if we step into your dojo? Been a while since I paid my respects to your ancestors."

"It's right this way," Kasumi spoke up, her eyes remaining fixed on Akane as her concern obviously matched that of Nabiki, who had a very strong sense that a major change in their lives was in the offing..."

Tonada had the driver pull up a few blocks away from the Tendo estate, deciding that covering the remaining distance would be better achieved from the level of the rooftops. He much preferred it that way as the traditional methods were more satisfying than the modern reliance on a more direct approach. His quarry was elusive, and he wanted to be ready.

Changing out from his street clothes into more traditional gear took only mere moments to complete, and then he vaulted to the top of a nearby wall and used it as a springboard to achieve the rooftop of the closest building. Running from roof to roof gave him a sense of unrestricted freedom, knowing that the petty fools at street level would hardly glance up to notice him passing through their midst, especially in a part of town that was frequented by powerful martial artists. Once he was near enough to the Tendo estate he came to a halt, having selected his best point of vantage, and settled in to view the show from concealment. He removed a folding set of binoculars from concealment and used them to scan the yard itself looking for his quarry and making certain that he knew the positions of all the key players. From there it would be a simple matter of waiting.

There was not much activity that he could discern at first glance, but he saw several figures stepping into the family dojo, which meant that they were either practicing or convening for one of their periodic challenge matches. From the position that he was in he could not make out more than a few of the players, but those he saw were close family members, so he decided to wait and observe further before moving in any closer to do a full sweep of the premises.

After all, the family itself was not essential to the fulfillment of his contract, only his primary target truly mattered, the others...were merely obstacles to be dealt with, with only one or two of them worth a second thought in terms of diversion.

Tonada smiled to himself as he thought of the sex-changing man-child whom he had come close to slicing in half. In a way it was disappointing to think how easily Saotome Ranma had gone down. To judge by his reputation he would have expected him to be more of a challenge. Perhaps if the boy did not immediately die he might provide more entertainment as the taste of steel would teach him to be more cautious. In any event, Tonada hoped to get some exercise in the course of completing his assignment, so he settled in to wait as patience was something that came very easy to an immortal. When the time was right, that would be when he would make his move and announce his presence, and then the blood would begin flowing.

Blood was something Tonada felt very much at home about, having seen so much of it in the feudal ages. Not as much call for slaughter in these modern "civilized" times, which just meant that he cherished the opportunities to spill it that much more. It was bloodshed that made the tedium of centuries of living that much easier to bear, so Tonada continued smiling, reveling in that thought that blood-innocent or otherwise-would be shed before the day was over...

"No!" Soun declared heatedly, "I will not consent to this! The engagement remains! Ranma will marry my Akane and that is all that is to be said about the matter!"

"Listen to me, you bloody idiot," Erin growled, "Your daughter is very ill and the engagement is making her condition worse! You've put an incredible amount of pressure on these two young people to force them into an engagement that was never of their choosing!"

"But they love each other," Kasumi reasoned, "How can you ask that Ranma and Akane be separated only a month before they were going to be married?"

"One month you say?" Erin gave a hard, flinty glare at the people sitting on the other end of a metaphorical dividing line, "According to what I hear this situation has been allowed to deteriorate over the past two years and you people have done NOTHING to correct it! What makes you think-and I'm using the word rather charitably here-that a single month will make all that much of an improvement?"

"But you have no right-!" Soun started to declare.

"Have I now?" Erin said archly, her tone even more fierce than before, "I have walked my way since the dawn of history, sometimes I act and sometimes I stand aside and let events happen as they will. It is my right to decide when and where to make a stand, and I am making one now, so get bloody used to the fact, because I am not leaving here until I am satisfied that you have heard me out and listened to what I am trying to tell you!"

"But what exactly is your interest in all of this, Erin-san?" Genma asked more reasonably, "You're not a part of this family. By what right do you presume to decide what is best for my son and Tendo-kun's daughter?"

"Funny you should mention that," Erin indicated Ukyo, who was sitting alongside with Shampoo and Leona, "It just so happens that you made a pact with her father to marry your son long before he knew anything about the Tendo family, or any engagements at all for that matter. That gives me the right to speak on her behalf as I owe Giri to her father, and it's clear enough the lass has no one else on hand to defend her interests!"

"The matter of engagement of Kuonji-san to my son has already been resolved with the return of her dowry, the Yatai my husband accepted," Nodoka said calmly, "Her claim has been rescinded..."

"NOT by me it hasn't!" Erin declared flatly, "Ukyo never agreed that the return of the dowry would signify the end of the engagement. That was decided by you lot in your arrogant insistence on preserving the Tendo alliance come hell or high water!"

"I won't hear any more of this!" Soun declared, "Leave my home now, and I forbid you to-urk!"

The tip of Erin's walking stick was suddenly pressed against his Adam's Apple even though Erin had not appeared to have moved from the spot where she had been previously standing. Her long arm held the stick motionless by the head while Soun's eyes screwed down to study it as though the thing had changed into a striking cobra.

"I'll decide when the matter between us is resolved here," she said in a tone that brooked no contradiction, then without moving her head she growled, "Draw steel on me, Nodoka, and you'll be eating that sword of yours. I'm trying to be civilized and reasonable here, but my temper has its limits, and you all know what I could do if you give me the slightest provocation."

Nodoka, who had been reaching for her family sword, halted her hand in mid-  
motion, knowing that her former mentor could sense her intention before the act was even committed.

"Calm down now, Erin-san," Genma said in a placating tone of voice, "There's no reason why we can't all be friends about this. You obviously feel the boy needs more time to get adjusted to the thought of marriage..."

"You haven't been listening to me at all," Erin said as she withdrew her walking stick from Soun's person, "It's not your son who's the problem here...it's Akane. She's very ill, she has a condition that is causing her to react violently to the slightest provocation. The medical term for it is too complicated for you lot to understand, but the simple name for it is Rage Disorder, and unless this problem is dealt with by therapy from a competent physician she will continue to grow worse until she snaps entirely and causes serious injury to another person."

All eyes turned to Akane, who sat with a downcast expression, only lifting her eyes for a moment to signify that she even understood that she was the object of current discussion.

"Erin-san," Nodoka said politely, "Surely you won't condemn poor Akane to a life without my son simply because she doesn't always handle stress in as constructive a manner as we might like..."

"You always were one to try and put the best spin on matters, 'Doka-san," Erin replied, "But wishful thinking isn't going to make the problem go away, any more than hoping that Akane will spontaneously and miraculously heal herself in time for her wedding. True the stress being placed upon her is more than an ordinary girl her age should have to labor under, and it's a wonder as it is that she hasn't snapped already. I'm thinking there may yet be time to salvage something of her future, but not if you keep pushing the marriage angle. Take that pressure off of her and maybe the rest of her condition will be more easily treated."

"You want me to break my sacred oath that our houses should be unite...?" Soun began to say, but Erin cut him off with a savage glare.

"Don't tell me this has anything to do with your personal honor," Erin's tone grew arched, "Because, last I checked, neither one of you two idiots even knows the meaning of the word, and I'm in a position to know about that! Don't forget, I remember what you lot were like before you got married!"

"Do tell?" asked Nabiki, eyeing her father as she added, "Sins of your past coming back to haunt you, Daddy?"

"That's not something that needs to be discussed, Nabiki," Soun said tightly, "And what are you really asking me to do here, Erin? Give up my sacred pledge...for her?" he stabbed an accusing finger towards Ukyo.

"Originally that was my intent," Erin replied, "Representing Ukyo's interests in front of you lot would be reason enough to be standing here trying to end this mess with as much face-saving and consideration of all parties concerned as could be managed. Of course..." she turned to give a nervous regard towards Cologne, who had remained silence during all of this, "Certain parties have convinced me that the situation is a bit more complex then even my initial impression, so I'm prepared to be flexible and include Shampoo-san as a second party whose interests I have been asked to represent. That's why I was hoping you two would be a little more accommodating here. I'm trying to save the life of your daughter, not join a long list of candidates who appear to have their own selfish interests in marrying this boy to this girl without regard to their personal welfare."

"But who are you to speak for their welfare?" Nodoka asked seriously, "We counted you as a friend from long ago, but now you come to tell us that you know what is better for my son and his iinazuke than his own parents?"

"Nodoka-san," Erin spoke in a heavy, somber voice, "It is true that I have been away from you and your family for a time, and much appears to have happened during my absence. In spite of everything that happened in the days of your youth, I bear none of you ill will and would not seek to disturb the harmony of you home but that circumstances have compelled me to act in the best interest of these young people. As a Medical Doctor I am honor-bound to heal the sick and the afflicted, and it is my professional opinion that Akane has a rare condition that must be treated now while her life can still be salvaged. If that means that I must intrude upon your role as parents then it is to be regretted, but I will not hesitate to do so."

"You're a doctor?" Kasumi asked, then hesitated before asking, "Do you...by chance know a Doctor named Tofu Ono?"

"Tofu-san?" Erin turned to look at the lovely girl who seemed to all appearances to be her age, around whom she sensed a stronger spirit than her father, and she smiled gently as she answered, "I knew of a Tofu-Sensei, but his name was Kouru. I think he did have a grandson by that name, so perhaps that is of whom you are thinking."

Nabiki suppressed the slight gasp that she felt from a slight shudder that ran down her spine at the casual way that the ice blonde woman had spoken those words, as if she were recalling something that had happened just the other day rather than decades in the past, and yet with a slight familiarity in her tone that implied her memory was recent. Nabiki could not shake the feeling of great age that seemed to attend this woman like a mantle. It was a sense that to her everyone in the room-even Cologne-was but a babbling infant, and the utter confidence in the manner with which she carried herself suggested that she had few fears and fewer cares about the normal run of human vices.

"But enough of things past," Erin turned purposefully back to confront the fathers, "It is the present we should be discussing here. The marriage cannot go ahead so long as your daughter's condition continues to be neglected. I humbly petition you to rescind your pledge, at least temporarily, until I have sufficient time to take Akane to seek professional counseling so that she can have a proper diagnosis. I will even pay her treatments, whatever it takes to make her as well again as modern science can accomplish."

"And what about my son?" Genma asked.

Erin's eyes narrowed as she regarded him, "You seem to have entangled your son in a number of conflicting commitments. I would offer my services in seeking the best arrangement that can satisfy all concerned parties, both Ukyo's claim and that of Shampoo-san."

"NEVER!" Soun was on his feet, manifesting his legendary Demon-Head attack, but Erin neither flinched nor lifted a hand and suddenly his attack was repelled, knocking Soun sprawling against the wall as though his Ki had been swatted down by a more powerful battle aura.

"Dad?" Akane showed the first flicker of emotional interest as Kasumi and Nodoka knelt down beside the fallen Soun to examine him closely.

"Whoah," Ranma exclaimed, no less impressed than anyone present.

"Did you see that?" Ukyo exclaimed in amazement.

"Aiyaa," Shampoo agreed, "White Hair repel angry father attack, no even move! Is amazing technique!"

"She's pissed," Leona murmured softly, about the only person present besides the old woman who did not seem at all surprised by Erin's Ryu.

"The Mirror Chi defense," Cologne nodded sagely, "She remembers it well, just as I once taught her."

Genma was stunned beyond words, looking from his fallen friend to the tall woman with white hair who had remained motionless the whole time. He had always known that Erin was a powerful fighter, but even he had never suspected how strong she truly was, and to so casually deflect a Ki-attack merely by changing the polarity of her aura...

Erin lowered her head and spoke somberly, "I ask that you do not attempt that again. This dojo is like holy ground to me, and I would not prefer to fight here in earnest. Still and all, you did ask a very good question just now, Nodoka-san. Who indeed am I to presume to speak on behalf of your son." She turned and regarded Ranma, "What about it, Lad? What do you want for yourself in all of this? Speak up, it is your life and future that's being discussed, and it only seems fitting you have a say here."

Ranma's mouth hung open and he looked stunned by the question, as well he should, thought Nabiki from where she sat studying his reaction. It must have been the first time in memory that anyone had honestly asked him for his opinion, or-indeed-seemed prepared to actually listen to his side for a change. It literally left him tongue-tied.

"Wh-what I want?" Ranma asked as if uncertain about the question.

"O'Shea-san!" Nabiki suddenly spoke up, "May I say something here?"

All heads turned in her direction, and Nabiki could almost hear the direction of their thoughts, but preferred not to let their expectations distract her from what she wanted to say, having sensed at long last the opportunity to do something to make a positive difference. She felt her resolve waver a bit when the jade eyes of the white haired Titaness turned to regard her with critical regard, though her tone was polite and formal as she replied, "Yes, Nabiki-san? You have something to contribute?"

Nabiki fought the odd reluctance that suddenly fell over her and gathered her strength together before lifting his gaze and saying, "I'm in full agreement with your view that something must be done to resolve this situation, and if you can help my sister out, then I ask that you do so, and please disregard the hasty words of our father."

Reactions throughout the dojo were mixed with a near-universal silence prevailing over all concerned parties, who had clearly not been prepared for the strange declaration of the middle Tendo daughter. Kasumi and Nodoka were surprised while Akane turned a look almost of betrayal in Nabiki's direction. Shampoo and Ukyo were staring at her as if they were wondering who it was that had taken the place of the infamous Tendo mercenary, and even Cologne seemed taken aback by the request. As for Ranma...Nabiki could feel his confusion but dared not to look at him to confirm this. Her eyes were locked on Erin, attempting to employ all of her well-honed skills for reading people, trying to determine if this woman was indeed to be trusted, and how she might react tot he offer from someone who was clearly not the head of the household.

Leona was looked around at all the gasps and surprised faces, wondering what there was about the short-brown haired girl that was earning such a mixture of reactions. As far as she could tell the girl had just shown more sense than her entire family put together, which was almost cause for celebration after the unremitting hostility displayed by Akane's pig-headed father.

"Interesting," Erin remarked after a long moments pause, "You agree that your sister is in need of medical attention?"

"It's been pretty obvious for a while now that Akane isn't really herself any more," Nabiki glanced down, ignoring the burning sense of shame that she felt at the looks she was receiving from her family, "She used to laugh and smile a lot more, and sometimes you could actually talk to her without making her angry, and she's been growing more violent every day...she's just not the Akane I grew up with."

"And you care enough about her to admit that she has a problem," Erin's expression softened, "What a relief that is. And here I'd come to think there was no one sensible in this household. At least one of you has the wisdom to think of someone other than themselves and their own personal ambitions."

That brought another series of startled reactions from all around, and if Leona had never been acquainted with the concept of a facefault before, what she witnessed in that moment was a pretty fair approximation.

"I-I'm not really like that," Nabiki admitted, feeling her shame override her normal instincts for self-promotion, "I just want my sister to get better."

"That's still more generosity than I've seen in anyone else in this room, barring only a fianc e," Erin turned to regard Soun, "Your daughter puts you to shame, Tendo-san. It's plain where the brains in this family reside...and perhaps even the heart as well. I'm glad to see that at least one child of this House carries on the spirit of your late wife, Kimiko."

Nabiki could not believe that she was hearing herself being praised above Kasumi, and she almost protested this but for the sense that Erin had not finished speaking.

"You have my deep sympathy for her loss," Erin said without the least trace of disrespect in her voice, "Of all the women who were after your hand in marriage, I liked her the best, which is no slight to either of the other two main contestants."

"What?" Kasumi turned to look at her father, "Father...what's this about other women?"

"It...happened a long time ago," Soun reluctantly replied, "Before any of you were born..."

"Ah," Genma spoke up, "As Erin-san said, that's all in the past, nothing to be brought up here, right?"

"As you say," Erin sighed, then turned to regard Ranma again, "Have you had time to think about it, Lad? Do speak up and give us your opinion. Do you still want to go ahead and marry Tendo Akane, even knowing what I told you about her medical condition?"

Ranma glanced down and sighed, "I don't really know what I want any more. I've been trying to do the right thing so people will stop yelling at me and blaming me for stuff, but if the engagement is really hurting Akane...I don't want her to be angry any more. I wanna help if I can, and if that means waiting until she's better..."

"Ranma," Soun sat upright, "How can you say that? Saotome, what kind of a son did you raise..."

"I see," Nodoka said softly, looking at her son, "This is what you want for Akane, Ranma?"

Ranma's eyes went to his mother and he reluctantly nodded, "Yeah, Mom...I think it's for the best if we don't get married right away. Maybe later when she's not always so angry about stuff..."

"And what of you, Akane?" Nodoka asked, "Do you also believe that it would be a good idea to wait until you feel better?"

"I..." Akane glanced down, "I don't really know what I want either. I...I don't really think...I'm not..." she sighed and glanced down, "I don't know any more. I just feel so very tired...about everything..."

"So it's settled," Erin turned back to regard Soun, "Your children have decided to wait before they make a final decision about marriage, all that remains is for you to acknowledge this as a fact and do what any loving father would do in your position. Will you continue to let pride blind you to the obvious, that this is not a union that can be consummated under the present circumstances? Ask what Kimiko-san would have wanted before you give me your answer."

That last line seemed to give pause to Soun as he had been about to make another angry protest, only to have the words die unvoiced as he considered Erin's words, pride indeed warring with a father's love for his daughter.

"Daddy," Nabiki turned to regard her father, "I know you want one of us to marry Ranma, but we can't unite the families unless Ranma and Akane agree to it, and if you try to force them it'll turn into an even worse debacle than the last time."

"Nabiki's right, Father," Kasumi joined in, "I always thought it was because they were too young to be married, but Akane's been under so much pressure lately, I really don't think it would help trying to make the decision for her."

"My son has said what he needs to say on this subject," Nodoka said with great composure, "I back his decision. It is a manly thing to do, don't you agree, husband?"

"Ah..." Genma made a good impression of a deer caught in the headlight, but it was plain that outright contradicting his wife was not an option. Rather than say so and risk alienating his longtime friend, he chose to bow his head and remain silent.

Soun thought a moment more, then lifted his gaze and asked, "You say delay...not end the engagement?"

"Not altogether," Erin replied, "But there is another issue that must be resolved, and that is the competing engagements of the other two fianc es. As I am their designated representative, I will not stand for seeing their interests dismissed or disregarded as they have been in the past. In my eyes, Ukyo is as valid a claimant as either Shampoo or your daughter, and it is clear enough that the boy likes her very much but feels constrained against expressing himself in that manner. As for Shampoo...Elder Cologne has requested that I take her under my wing and uphold her best interests as she has lost considerable status among her people due to the reluctance of her designated husband to acknowledge their marital status."

"What?" Soun gasped, "But..."

"This isn't a game where one wins and the other two lose, Tendo-san," Erin explained, "I want to find a way of balancing everyone's interests so that there are no losers and everyone wins, and to that end I have a proposal of my own that I want to venture to you lot, if you've any interest."

"A proposal where everyone wins?" Kasumi asked.

"No one has to lose?" Nabiki seconded.

"Can such a thing be possible?" Nodoka asked.

"It is," Erin replied, "If you can see past the conventional to seek other ways of solving a problem."

"Uh oh," Leona murmured.

"What's wrong?" Ukyo asked.

"I hear another teaching lecture in the works," Leona sighed with grim fatalism.

"Before even I was a wee lass," Erin began, "There was a lad named Alexander who was faced with a little problem called the Gordian Knot. As legend would have it, whoever could untie this knot would become master of the world. Many had tried to untangle it, and all had failed until Alexander heard the legend and came to explore it for himself."

"Even I know that one," Ranma spoke up, surprising everyone that he would say so, "Didn't he take a sword and cut the thing in half?"

"He did indeed," Erin smiled, "A clear example of Lateral thinking, centuries before its time. Simply put, a problem that cannot be unraveled in an ordinary sense can sometimes be unwound by using a direct approach that cuts through the tangle of distractions and competing interests. Way I see it, the only way to solve this problem is to look beyond the conventional approach that seems to be causing everyone so much misery and distress, which would mean giving up your exclusive claims and combining your resources to a united approach that will best solve the problem."

"United approach?" Shampoo blinked, "Shampoo no understand..."

"I do," Cologne nodded slowly, "We discussed this between ourselves before rejoining the rest of you, and I agree with Erin that it may provide the best of all possible solutions."

"Indeed," Erin turned and surprised Nabiki by paying her a sidelong regard, "It may even be that the solution can be modified to include other interests that were not apparent at the time of our discussion, Elder."

"Eh?" Nabiki reacted, uncertain how to take that last comment.

Soun continued to stare at the floor, but slowly he raised his eyes to meet Erin's level stare, and in a voice neither hard nor yielding he said, "I'll listen to your proposal...but I won't accept any solution that does not recognize the union of our two houses."

Erin frowned marginally but said, "You set a great deal of stock to that claim, but I won't press you for a reason. Very well, then hear me out and I think you will see that what I have to say is as much in your best interest as...eh?"

Of a sudden her tone faltered and she turned to the front entrance of the dojo, where Leona saw a diminutive man, even as she felt a sensation even stronger than the peculiar sense that she had around Cologne. This time the feeling was close to that of an Immortal, and as she turned to the sight of the dwarf she stifled the impulse to reach for her katana, remembering that the dojo was a kind of holy ground that would prohibit the employment of lethal force of any kind.

"What's going on in here?" the small, gnome-like old man asked, "Why isn't dinner...ERIN!"

"Happosai?" Erin replied, blinking her eyes in amazement.

"Erin!" the old man cried happily as he bounded forward, moving so fast that Leona thought his legs must have been spring loaded, only to have his forward progress intercepted by Erin's fist in his face, which caused the old man to fall stunned to the floor of the dojo.

"Master Happosai," Erin said with a pleasant grin, "So good to see you still well and about, old friend."

"Aiyaa," Shampoo exclaimed.

"Erin knows the old freak?" Ukyo asked, no less appalled.

"Of course!" Leona exclaimed in disgust as she rolled her eyes towards the ceiling, "SHE KNOWS EVERYBODY! Haven't you guys figured that out by now?"

"Erin?" Happosai recovered from the blow and hopped back to his feet, producing his pipe from seeming no where, "Well, well...when did you get back to Japan? Seems like quite a while...you haven't changed at all, of course."

"Neither have you, you old pervert," Erin grinned affably, "Still bothering the ladyfolk hereabouts? I should have expected you'd be about with these two big disappointments of yours occupying the family dojo."

"Don't remind me," Happosai said in disgust, "Lately I've been trying to forget that those two were ever my students."

"It seems you have been getting around a lot the last few hundred years, Erin," Cologne remarked as she came to join them, "Of course I shouldn't be at all surprised that the both of you have run into one another."

"The last few hundred years?" Nabiki blurted out.

"Oh my," Kasumi remarked, "She certainly doesn't look it."

"There's a lot you young people don't know about Erin," Genma admitted, "But the Master was always fond of her."

"Maybe because she's the only attractive woman he knows that he can't lay a hand on," Soun remarked in a sour tone of voice.

"Be good to reacquaint myself with you and what we've both been doing the last few decades, Master Happy," Erin indicated Leona, "By the way, I'd like to introduce you to..."

"HOWSAAA!" Happosai cried as he launched himself towards Leona, who started to react when the old man's forward progress came to an abrupt halt as Erin snagged him by his collar.

"As I was about to say, Master," Erin resumed as she dangled the little man at arm's length, "Leona there is my newest apprentice, and I'd take it as a kind gesture on your part if you'd spare her your normal way of making introductions."

"Ah, you're no fun," the old man groused, but then he got a sly look on his face as he said, "Will you make it worth my while if I keep away from her...at least for a while?"

The silver-haired Celt heaved a long sigh then said, "If you must, then go ahead," then she turned her eyes towards the ceiling as the little man happily wrapped his arms around her chest and squeezed her ample bosoms, with Erin not lifting a finger to stop him.

"Oooh, baby!" Happosai said happily, "I've wanted at these beauties for as long as I've known you!"

"That isn't too surprising," Cologne noted in clear disgust.

Leona's mouth hung open as she watched her mentor allowing the ancient pervert to take liberties with her instead of plant him through the floorboards of the dojo, then murmured to Ukyo, "Is he always like this?"

"That's Happosai all right," Ukyo replied, "World's most Evil and Perverted Martial Arts Master."

"Aiyaa," Shampoo blinked her eyes, "You mentor must like Leona very much to let evil old pervert to that to her. Even Shampoo no have much luck against Great Grandmother old boyfriend."

"HE IS NOT MY BOYFRIEND!" Cologne sternly retorted.

"Aw, who'd want a dried up old prune like you?" Happosai responded.

Leona blinked her eyes as she contemplated the horrible fate that Erin had just spared her, then shuddered.

Erin finally got tired of the whole thing and said, "You had enough yet, Master? I'd like to get back to what..." her tone broke off again as she turned her head, then glanced towards the ceiling. Without a word she dislodged the pervert and headed for the door to the dojo.

Leona felt the sensation too, the sense of something walking over her grave and crawling over her belly, which was why she got up immediately to follow her Mentor.

"What's up?" Ranma asked as he sensed the danger and got to his own feet, as did the rest of the martial artists.

"Trouble," Erin replied as she came out into the yard, then hastily darted to the side as a set of iron spike struck the ground where she had been standing. Her walking stick moved in a blur to deflect several other such objects, and then she assumed a defensive crouch, even as Leona got far enough into the yard to see who was attacking from the rooftop of the dojo.

"Well, well," remarked a masked man dressed like a Ninja, "I should have guessed you would be here with the Tendos after our last meeting, Hiberian."

"Tonada," Erin frowned, "To what do I owe the honor?"

"Karma," the masked man replied, extending a straight-edged blade slightly less than the length of a katana, "I've not come for you but for another, but if you stand in my way, I won't complain about it."

"You always were a fool and a scoundrel," Erin said as she held her walking still in both hands horizontal to the ground and at arms length, "Come at me, then, if you dare it."

"I more than dare...I do!" the man raised both arms and stood as straight as his sword blade, and suddenly he was surrounded by a shimmering outline that towered around him with the image of a black dragon.

"What's going on?" Soun asked from the doorway to the dojo, taking a step forward.

"Stay back!" Erin called out, "Nobody move! This is between me and that Skeiline!"

"Worry about your own head while you have it, Hiberian!" Tonada cried as the dragon rose high above his head and came crashing down in a blazing flash of ebony fire, stunning everyone who was caught near to the radius of the explosion.

"Ouch!" Leona winced as she went flying back into the dojo, to strike a weapons rack and momentarily be buried beneath it. She waited until the ringing in her ears subsided before groaning to herself, "Why can't we ever just take a nice, quiet vacation...?"

Continued.

Comments/Criticism/Climatic Battles of Good Versus Evil: shadowmane

The conclusion of the battle Royale, and will Erin survive long enough to solve the problems that beset Ranma and the others? Who is Tonada after, and will the rest of the gang stand idly by and let it happen? And will Leona be able to get through the rest of the day without being killed at least one more time? The answers next time when it all comes together, so by all means kindly be there!

X

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	5. Chapter 5

IMNerima5

Ill Met in Nerima

By Jim Robert Bader

(Inspired by the works of Rumiko Takahashi and the creators and producers of the Highlander series)

Part Five.

"Yes?" the sergeant on duty at the Furinkan Municipal Police Precinct station asked of the two young women who walked in through the front door.

The lead of the two flashed her badge and said, "Officers Miyuki and Natsumi here to pick up a prisoner for transport to Lockup. Here are all the forms and paperwork already signed and approved by our Lieutenant."

"I see," Sergeant Yamamura noted as he gave a cursory glance at the forms that the lady officer with the long braid gave him, "Well, everything appears to be in order. The prisoner is in detention. We'll release him to your custody, then it's your problem."

"We were told the prisoner is a foreign national and should be handled with extreme care," Officer Natsumi spoke up, "Is this some kind of local political thing, and if so why isn't Foreign Affairs handling this one instead of a couple of beat cops like us?"

"Well," Yamamura rubbed a finger along the bridge of his nose while considering his answer, "The matter is sensitive, but not just political. You see, the individual in question is reckoned to be highly dangerous and extremely resourceful. He's been in our country for close to two years on a worker's visa, but I understand that his privileges there have been revoked and he's being deported back to China at the express request of a leading representative of the local Chinese community. His name is Mu Tsu and he's something of a local legend...a longtime nuisance that we've wanted to rid ourselves of for quite some time now, but...well...circumstances tied our hands until quite recently..."

"Excuse me," Natsumi blinked her eyes, "Did you say his name is Mousse?"

"That's what it sounds like to most ears," Yamamura smiled, "Except everyone else tends to think of him more like the gel you apply after Shampoo and Cr me Rinse. Be careful not to laugh at him, though, he tends to be pretty sensitive about such things."

"We would never think of giving offense even to a foreign national who is out of favor with his own countrymen," Miyuki assured the Sergeant, turning an arched look towards her partner, "Right, Natsumi-chan?"

The other lady officer glanced away and grumbled, "All right...whatever..."

There was a violent noise that shook the air, seeming to come from outside of the station house, and the two plainclothed lady officers felt the floor shake under their feet for a moment, only to have the trembler pass mere heartbeats later. Much to their amazement, the Sergeant just rode the trembler out and hardly gave more than a glance over his shoulder to signify even a passing interest.

"What the heck was that?" Natsumi gasped.

"It sounded like an explosion," Miyuki reasoned.

"Not really, Yamamura replied, "An explosion wouldn't shake things up like that, and you can tell from the pitch of the noise that it wasn't made with explosives. Most probably it was a Ki burst, Level four, if I judge it correctly."

"A Ki burst?" Natsumi started.

"Yeah, we get them all the time around here," Yamamura wave a dismissive land, "It's nothing major to worry about. Probably just a couple of the local martial artists duking it out over who picks up the tab at the Nekohaten."

"Now hold on," Miyuki declared in great concern, "Somebody might get hurt if an actual fight between two trained Martial artists is breaking out somewhere..."

"No, that's the really odd thing," Yamamura noted with a peculiar expression, "Nobody ever really does get hurt too badly. Lots of property tends to get destroyed, but few human lives are ever really placed in actual danger. The Martial Artists seem to all have a code here to only beat up on each other, and when the dust finally does settle it just means more employment for the local repair guys. They patch things up in no time, and pretty soon everything's back to normal."

"You've got to be putting us on!" Natsumi declared in frank disbelief, "Don't you guys even try and have these people arrested for disturbing the peace and creating a public nuisance?"

"What would be the point?" Yamamura asked, "Our precinct house is pretty small and underfunded, and the district will only authorize us to go after legitimate bad guys. I don't have the manpower or budget to field enough people to deal with these Ultra-level fighters. I also don't have enough medical coverage, and I can't afford to have people laid up sick or injured because they made a fool blunder like getting into the middle of one of these periodic challenge matches. Besides, as long as they're only beating up on one another, it makes things safe for the rest of the citizens living in this city as no thief thinks it's worth his life to risk coming out here and pull a heist. The last gang that did so wound up in traction for six months and had to wheeled in for their hearing before we could even set bail."

"You ever hear of guns?" Natsumi asked, "You could try threatening them with that."

Yamamura looked at her as though she had just grown a second head, "You may do things a bit differently in the part of Tokyo you guys hail from, but one thing we never do around here is try to take one of these guys on bare-handed, and we absolutely don't point weapons in their direction, and you absolutely never, ever try to shoot one...it just makes them angry."

"I had no idea that such a level of violence was common out in this part of Nerima," Miyuki sadly noted.

"You think they're bad now?" Yamamura sniffed, "Just wait until they graduate from High School."

"What?" Natsumi cried indignantly, "Are you honestly telling us that your problem is with a bunch of teenaged hoodlums?"

"Actually no," Yamamura replied, "Some of them are actually pretty nice kids, basically law abiding, if you discount their penchant for occasional, random acts of mayhem and destruction..."

"It sounds as if they're in need of some strict parental supervision," Miyuki noted with a look of disapproval.

"Well...there you have me," Yamamura shrugged, "Unfortunately they got the luck of the draw in that department, but what are you gonna do about it? We keep tabs on the local activity and step in when we think its appropriate, but since their parents are in large measure a part of the overall problem..."

"And I thought those urban legends surrounding the Tomobiki area sounded like exaggerations," Natsumi remarked in dismay, "You mean you guys can't even handle a bunch of juvenile delinquents because their parents aren't doing their public-  
service duty of reining in their delinquent behavior...and why are you looking at me that way?"

"Just wondering if your related to somebody I know," Yamamura said dryly, "You wouldn't happen to know a lady named Ninamiya Hinako? She's a local teacher at Furinkan High School..."

"Nope, never heard of her," Natsumi looked puzzled, "Why?"

"Just asking," Yamamura shrugged, "I'll have someone show you where Mu Tsu is being held, and you can take him wherever you want to go. Don't underestimate him, though, he's tricky."

"We can handle one prisoner between the two of us, Sergeant," Miyuki said with a friendly smile, "I'm sure he can't be that much trouble."

"Should I have that engraved on your tombstone?" Yamamura smiled, "Never mind...odds are you'll find out the hard way..."

"All right," Hibiki Ryoga sighed, glancing around, "Where am I this time? Somehow this looks familiar..."

The eternally lost boy lowered his head and did something that was usually very difficult for him, which was to think instead of blindly setting off in a random direction, to arrive at points "who-knew-where." The place he was at looked familiar all right...and he knew he had been there many times before, but where in all his many wanderings had he been to this particular location...?

And then he remembered...this was the bridge over the canal that passed by Doctor Tofu's old office, a mid-way point between Furinkan High School and the Tendo Dojo, two places he would rather have avoided if he had any choice in the matter as both brought up bitter memories far too painful for him to what to deal with.

They brought back thoughts of failure, and something even more unpleasant. Something that he had seen during his last visit to the Tendo place a little over six months ago, which was a reason he had not been back there since.

It was only a few months after the disastrous attempt at a wedding between Ranma and Akane, after what he had thought was his last chance at a cure had been drunken by Happosai. Ryoga had gotten lost for a time only to wander back to the dojo in his cursed form, shamefully seeking the shelter of what had always been a safe harbor for him in times past: the loving arms of Akane, who thought of him as only her pet. At the time Ryoga had still been torn with indecision between her and his commitment to Akari, so he did what he normally did when wracked with doubt and torment...he went home to the loving arms of the woman who had first rescued him from the bleakness of his desolate existence.

What an irony that his curse had been responsible for his first discovering what happiness there was to be found in the simple act of being held by a loved on...a feeling that brought back warm thoughts of his mother, whom he had not seen in nearly five years of off-and-on-again travels. Snuggling up in Akane's arms had been the next best thing to heaven...what a comic jest it was that he had never had the courage to do that while he was human!

But that last occasion was what had changed it all. Ryoga had not seen Akane in such a long time that it surprised him to notice what changes had been wrought to her gentle, loving personality. The friendly, outgoing girl that she was appeared less and less frequently...in her place was the angry Akane that only came out when Ranma was present...only now she was angry a lot more often than she was happy. In fact, it took very little provocation for that anger to appear, and when it did the shift was so sudden that it took Ryoga by surprise, as he being no stranger to the berserker mindset that he saw manifested on that occasion.

Ranma had provoked it, of course, by doing something particularly perverted, but the reaction on Akane's part went well out of bounds to the magnitude of his crime, and when Akane's first blow had knocked him cold it did not expiate her anger but rather intensified it as Akane declared that Ranma was holding back on her again and condescending to her as a martial artist.

She pummeled his prone and helpless body until Ranma was barely breathing, and even then she gave him a vicious kick that knocked him into the koi pond, where he did not resurface for several long, tense minutes. It was only when Ryoga thought that his long-hated rival had truly breathed his last that Ranma-chan sputtered and came back to life, and only after Ryoga had dove into the pond to snag the boy-turned girl by the collar and drag her to the edge of the pond, which brought her head back up above the level of the water.

When Ranma-chan did recover consciousness she still looked like Hell, and she mumbled an absent thanks to Ryoga without even glancing his way before staggering back towards the house, looking unsteady on her feet as though at any moment she would topple over.

Ryoga had sat where he was for a very long time just staring after his longtime enemy, wondering what strange impulse had caused him to attempt to rescue her, and why-no matter how hard Ryoga tried to convince himself of this thought-that he could not find it in his heart to believe that it was Ranma's fault for Akane getting so angry.

That was when Ryoga at long last made a decision and turned his back on the dojo, never looking back, though the scenes of that day would replay themselves in his mind over and over. Of course it was all Ranma's fault...it was always Ranma's fault, wasn't it? Then why did the image of Akane's lovely features twisted with rage keep recurring every time he thought this? Ranma had done very little to cause that level of anger, and yet from the way everyone else in the household had behaved it was as though nothing out of the ordinary had happened. Try as he might Ryoga could not bring himself to believe that this was a proper situation, and so he had left to find a better life with someone who very rarely got angry, and only when he gave her ample reason.

Akari.

So where was she now? Ryoga was supposed to meet with her three days ago, but naturally he'd gotten lost performing a simple errand, and no doubt she'd be upset with him (though she rarely showed it) and he'd have to work extra hard to make it up to her. But at least she knew him, knew everything that there was to know about him, and accepted him without criticism and complaint, which made her a rarity among women and someone who had taught him much about the true meaning of love. She had given Ryoga the time he needed to reflect upon his life and see the many mistakes that he had made during his lonely, wandering existence. Looking back it all seemed so silly now...the fights with Ranma, hiding out in Akane's room as her pet pig, taking advantage of the hospitality of the Tendos and never paying his own way or contributing his fair share to the hot water and food bills. It was as if it all took place in another life, or he has awaken from a dream world to discover that reality was nothing like he had imagined.

He now had a new life ahead of him, one without a hatred to guide him, and no rivals to contend with. He wasn't like Mousse, blindly chasing after a girl who openly despised him, or Kuno, who was equally blind in his obsession for two women who equally loathed his affections. He was himself now, Hibiki Ryoga, and for the first time in a long while he felt pretty good about that, all because he was secure in the knowledge that Akari truly loved him...

...Now if only he could remember how to find his way back to Akari?

A loud explosion shook him out of his reveries and made him automatically turn his head back in the direction of the Tendo dojo. He saw the shadowy black outline of a potent battle aura being dispersed, as if one of his Shi Shi Houkonan blasts had just met with a Moko Takabishi. Without having to wonder or ask questions he knew implicitly that Ranma and Akane were involved somehow, only it implied more of an attack by someone else who knew how to summon darkness, besides Ryoga.

Without hesitating to think about it he turned and ran towards the plume of smoke he saw rising above the Tendo home, discarding his knapsack along the way with a toss that landed it in one of his usual hiding places. He took to the roofs as there was less chance of getting lost with altitude to guide him, and as long as he maintained a direct line-of-sight with his target he would find his way there in minutes...

Unfortunately he misjudged one of his leaps and came down in a yard that had a swimming pool. This resulted, of course, in some embarrassing moments in which he would waste valuable time having to seek out hot water, but that's not immediately relevant to this story...

Ranma threw up his arms to deflect the brunt of the blast that scattered everyone else caught near to the effective radius of impact. It was a Ki-attack unlike anything he had ever witnessed before, and not just because it made his skin crawl! It was like being hit in the face with a full-strength Shi-Shi Houkodan, and this not even near to the point of impact itself, which made it very hard to believe that anyone could survive being at the center of that massive devastation.

But when the smoke cleared there was a clear outline that heralded the sight of Erin O'Shea as she held her ground with walking stick held level. The ground about her feet was smoldering and a crater encircled the unaffected patch of ground where she was standing. She did not even appear to have her hair mussed out of place as she calmly raised her walking stick and caught the edge of a Ninja-To that had been aimed at her head as the Ninja-clad foe launched his attack from concealment. Several quick exchanges later and Erin forced him to back away to a reasonable distance.

"You have improved much since the last time, Hibernian," Tonada complimented as he assumed a fighting crouch, "But then again, so have I."

"Not nearly enough, I be thinking," Erin replied as she gave the handle of her staff a sharp twist, then slowly slid part of the wood away to reveal the long straight edge of a meter-long blade much resembling the Ninja-To held by her opponent. With a casual, practiced move she undid the ornate buckle to her belt then slid the guard down the length of her weapon until it reached the base of the handle, and then she tapped it into place with an audible clinking noise. All the while she kept her eyes focused on the hooded man, her eyes like flint as she studied him carefully for the least hint that he was attacking.

"You mean that stick she carries is really a sword?" asked Ukyo as she came to stand beside Ranma.

"Aiyaa," Shampoo expressed softly as she, too, came to stand beside Ranma, "Is almost like cross between Chinese blade and Japanese. Metal gleam very bright with ripples, must be made by true Master. Shampoo no see sword like that even in legends."

"Quite so," Cologne similarly observed, "That sword is the legendary Morgan-  
Kirin, forged by an equally legendary smith who folded the metal two thousand times over to give it an edge that the finest carbonized steels of today could not hope to match. It is over five hundred years old and was created for Erin during one of her earliest visits to these Islands...""

"Five hundred years?" Ranma exclaimed, "That's even older than you, Ghoul!"

"Quite a bit so, yes," Cologne sounded thoughtful, "I just hope it's enough to help her prevail against the likes of this young fellow."

"Oh man," Leona groaned as she staggered up to join the others, "Why does everybody we meet have to play so rough? Hey! She drew her sword?"

"Looks like it," Nabiki noted, having wisely taken shelter during the worst of the Ki blast.

"Oboy," Leona said nervously, "She never pulls that out unless it's serious! That's guy's toast, mark my word on it!"

"Somebody better tell him that," Ukyo noted, seeing the confident in the eyes of the hooded Tonada.

"When was it last we met?" the Ninja asked with an almost nonchalant manner that broke the tense silence that had hung between him and Erin, "Sometime early on in the Meiji era, I think..."

"Aye," Erin replied, "And you haven't changed a bit from back then. You're still a two bit hood hiring himself out to whoever pays your price, hiring yourself out to the government, or whichever way the wind might blow..."

"While you still play at being the warrior scholar," Tonada taunted back, "But I know that beneath that refined exterior beats the heart of the legendary Hitokiri, Shiroi Osage! Even in the province of Edo they spoke of you in whispered legends of the Bride with White Hair who returned from the dead to avenge her Lord and Princess."

"I only did what I've ever done in the name of the people whom I'm pledged to protect," Erin said darkly, "Defend or avenge, but what have you ever believed in besides yourself that you could talk about the past in anything but shame and dishonor? We're both relics of that bloody era, only one of us has outlived their time..."

"If you feel that way, then by all means come ahead and die," Tonada said as he assumed a threatening position.

"You first," Erin replied, assuming the counter position as they each continued studying the other.

"Did he just call her Shiroi Osage?" Ukyo gasped.

"Yeah, why?" Ranma wondered.

"The Bride with White Hair is a legend even in China," Cologne supplied helpfully, "The incident that the young man over there is referring to happened four hundred and seventy-two years ago, when Erin was the sole survivor of the massacre at White Crane Castle, when Baron Mukudori Sitai and over four thousand of his household retainers were slaughtered by a rival clan of Samurai named Kurajin due to the betrayal of a trusted family servant. The legend has it that Shiroi Osage rose from her grave to personally visit each warrior of the Kurajin clan and administer a quick and silent death that was like an act of the gods...though in reality it was simply Erin putting to use her training in Ninjutsu. To exact revenge for the loss of her loved ones."

"Ninjutsu?" Leona blinked her eyes, "She never told me she was a Ninja?"

"I suspect that there is much about your mentor that she has never yet imparted to you," Cologne mused, "Perhaps you should ask her."

"Yeah, right," Leona growled, "Like she'd tell me her whole life story..."

"Hey," Ukyo blinked, "Your Japanese has improved, Sugar...why is that?"

Leona blinked, "Huh? Uh...that's a very good question..."

"Hey," Akane spoke up, "What is she doing?"

Erin relaxed her stance, causing Tonada to frown by a fraction, and in a more respectful tone of voice she said, "Before we begin, I ask that we not fight in this yard, so near to hallowed ground. Far better we take this where we won't have as many witnesses..."

"I prefer to fight where I am," Tonada said levelly, "If you do not fight me seriously, then you will die, and your legend will die with you."

Erin's eyes became like slits as she resumed her fighting crouch, "Kenshin should have taken your head when he had the chance..."

"The boy was much too merciful for his own good," Tonada replied, "I may not have beaten him then, but they say a long life is the best revenge..."

"Yours won't last any longer," Erin declared, and then like a blur the two went into motion, coming at each other in a blazing speed during which the sound of metal striking metal was the only sound to indicate their conflict. It went on for several seconds, then the two of them broke off and turned about, facing each other from opposite corners. A pause was all that lasted before the clash of steel resumed again and the two moved with incredible speed from one end of the yard to the other.

"Incredible," Soun exclaimed almost breathlessly, "Their form is nearly perfect..."

"Their thrusts and timing are incredible," Genma agreed, "I had no idea that she was that good, but the guy she's fighting with..."

"He's very good, too," Nodoka agreed, "He's pushing Erin harder than I've seen anyone do with her before..."

"Too hard," Cologne frowned, "He's much better than he should be. His style is a combination of powerful techniques, but there's no real center to his form, while Erin is as graceful and coordinated as I remember..."

"She ain't half bad," Ranma agreed, only to fall silent as the brief impasse came to an abrupt end with Erin suddenly moving in and around her opponent to strike at him from a sweeping-upward slice that knocked him sprawling and left a huge gash in his backside.

"It's over," Erin declared as she came to stand over the man with her sword held out under his chin, "You've lost...but I'm in a generous mood and I'll be willing to let you go, on the condition that you leave here in peace, and without your sword."

Tonada rolled over onto his back and smiled up at her, "I'd like to, but I can't, really."

Leona saw the man flick a wrist that was pointing up at her mentor and immediately sensed treachery. Ranma saw it took and started moving forward. Of course Erin had the best vantage of all as her eye tracked the subtle movement and saw the tell-tale muzzle pointing up at her as that wrist flicked a trigger and caused the hidden firearm to discharge.

The impact of a small-caliber bullet being fired at short range into her chest was enough to pick Erin up and send her sprawling. Tonada got up and retrieved his sword as Ranma closed the distance between them, but with almost casual ease the Ninja side-stepped the young warrior's fist and almost contemptfully delivered a backhanded blow to the base of Ranma's skull, toppling him over as though he were playing with a mere infant. Ranma instantly recovered, doing a handspring that carried him back to his feet as he turned to face his opponent.

"You better fight serious if you're going up against me, boy," Tonada said dismissively, "Around here you may be regarded as fast, but in my experience you barely even qualify as a trotter."

"Tough talk from a clown who won't even show his face in a fight and has to cheat to win his battles," Ranma taunted, "I'll show you how fast I really am."

"I've a better idea," Tonada said as he raised his sword above his head, "Why don't I show you some fireworks while taking this Bitch's head for my latest trophy?"

Leona lurched forward, reaching for her sword without even thinking about it. She had been warned many times about interfering in a fight, but with Erin's life at stake she couldn't stand to remain idle.

Of course her speed was nothing when compared to that of Ukyo, who launched a series of throwing spatulas faster than the eye could track and forced Tonada to divert a portion of his attention to deflecting these, which left an opening that Ranma instantly exploited.

"KACHU TENSHEN AMAGURIKEN!" Ranma cried as his hands became a blur, striking at his opponent with a speed that defied the human eye to follow. Tonada merely stepped out of reach of the blows and used his sword to deflect the pressure-  
waves created by Ranma's hand before turning the blade outward in a thrust that forced Ranma to dodge backward, which left open to a side-slash that grazed his ribs while slicing his shirt open.

Tonada was about to reverse the motion of his thrust, a move that would have sliced Ranma in two had it been completed, when his instincts warned him to whirl about, just in time to intercept a bonbori mace and slice the handle clean away before the heavy metal spear could crush him. As the second mace came homing in for his exposed chest, Shampoo thought she had him cold, only to see him twist his body side-ways and reverse his sword yet again so that the Mace came no where near to connecting. Surprise left her momentarily exposed and vulnerable as the tip of the blade snaked around in search of her ample chest, only to be deflected at the last instant by a bakers peel that was thrust into the path of his Ninja-To. Tonada was forced to step back and regard the three teenagers who were flanking him from three different directions.

"N-No," Leona heard Erin gasp, "Not all together...you'll make it too easy for him..."

"Too true," Tonada smiled from beneath his mask, and suddenly the build-up of his Ki-energy exploded out from his body, catching all three teenagers simultaneously and hurling them backwards.

"Yikes!" Leona cried as she ducked under the wave of force that threatened to topple her over. By some miracle she managed to hold onto her position while Tonada casually lowered his blade and regarded Erin with grim satisfaction.

"Now that we're alone again...eh?" Tonada took notice of Leona, "What's this? Your young apprentice wishes to play tag-team. For shame, Hibernian...letting her violate the sacred rules that you and I live under. I had thought you a better teacher than this."

"Run...love," Erin gasped, still not fully recovered from her chest wound, "I'll be all right."

"Huh?" Leona looked down, then at the black-robed man before her and she swallowed with nervousness but held her sword out at the ready.

"I see," Tonada scowled, "You are wise enough to know that you have no chance against me, but you hope to buy your mentor time by offering up your own pathetic life. Very noble and heroic, but ultimately futile. Say good-bye to your beloved Mentor!"

And with that he brought the sword down, aiming for Erin, only to have the blade be blocked at the very last second.

"What?" Tonada gasped incredulously as he saw Erin smile up at him, easily balancing her sword between her hands as it blocked his To from descending.

"Not quite yet, ye cousin O' a Wood Spire," she grinned without humor, though Leona could see that it was mostly for bravado and Erin was not yet sufficiently up to strength to renew the encounter.

Seeing nothing better to do for it, Leona gave a savage cry and lunged forward, her sword moving in her hands the way she had been taught in a thrust that caused the Ninja to back away suddenly and turn his blade to deflect her own. Unfortunately that left her extremely open and vulnerable to him, and as she lacked Erin's supple agility and combat experience she knew that she was as good as toasted. His sword came snaking up at her, only to turn aside at the last instant and miss her completely, a fact that so utterly surprised Leona that she want sailing past his position to land in a less-than-graceful roll that caused her to lose her grip upon her sword blade.

When she looked up again she was amazed to see the diminutive Happosai holding the larger man's sword at bay using nothing but a pipe and some leverage to counterbalance his foe's superior size and weapon. In a rather annoyed tone of voice the little man said, "Can't abide seeing the Lovelies get carved up by the likes of you. What's the matter with you, boy? Don't you know the world's got a shortage of such cuties?"

"You!" Tonada's eyes widened, then narrowed, "At last I come face-to-face with the infamous Demon Master that I was contracted to slay."

"What?" Genma said in amazement.

"You're not serious?" Soun added with equal dismay.

"Man, if you'd just told us you were after the old freak in the first place we wouldn't have to be doing this," Ranma declared as he got back to his feet, along with all of the others, "We'd have even helped you out..."

"How dare you show disrespect for your master?" Happosai growled, "I'll have you know that I'm the one who just saved a pretty girl from this nasty ol' bugger."

"Maybe," Tonada smiled, "But you've also made my job a lot easier."

And with that he turned his blade to the side and reversed direction, forcing the little man to compensate as he brought his greater mass to bear in a thrust that caught the little man under one shoulder. Happosai grunted once in pain then collapsed to his knees, leaking blood into his own dark ninja uniform.

"Happy!" Cologne cried in dismay as everyone stared in shock and disbelief at what had happened.

"Now then," Tonada smiled as he withdrew his To, "Assignment completed, which leaves the rest of you as my bonus.""

"He...he killed him," Ranma sounded shocked in spite of his words uttered in previous seconds.

"Not quite yet," Tonada smiled as he rested his blade on his shoulder with an attitude that exuded confidence, "But wait another moment and we'll make it official."

"What?" Leona gasped in amazement, staring at the slumped form of the diminutive martial arts master, "You mean he's...?"

"One of us?" Erin replied as she started to sit upright, leaning on her own sword with a grim and purposeful expression, "Ye didn't notice before, luv? His Quickenin's different from ours, mainly on account of how he got to be an Immortal..."

"And lucky me," Tonada's eyes lit up with mad amusement, "I get to be the one who ends the legendary career of the Demon Martial Arts master! Once I absorb his power and experience I will be an even greater fighter than before...strong enough to take on all of you at once and triumph!"

"Not just yet," Erin stood erect to her full height and lifted her blade, "Ye have to go through me to get t'him, and that ye'll never do no matter what treachery ye use t'tilt the odds in yer favor..."

"Don't make me laugh, O'Shea," Tonada scoffed, "You haven't healed enough to be at your full strength, and I won't give you the chance to do so!"

The thrust in her direction but Erin struck his sword aside and staggered back for several paces. Tonada pressed the attack and she gave a bit more, and as she staggered she growled, "Nobody interferes! Everyone keep back, includin' you, luv!"

"What?" Leona gasped, "But...!"

"Do as she tells you," Cologne said grimly, "Your mentor knows what she is about, trust her."

"What is she doing?" Ukyo asked as she saw Erin continue to stagger backward, barely managing to counter the Ninja's thrust as he attacked her.

"Huh?" Ranma glanced down, noticing the footwork of the two fighters then gasped, "Now I get it! Everybody, clear out of here! Give as much room as you can!"

"Huh?" Kasumi asked, "What's wrong, Ranma? Why...?"

"Don't argue with him, Oneechan," Nabiki said, having also taken notice of the retreating pattern that Erin was taking.

Tonada was growing more and more frustrated that his attacks were not getting through Erin's defenses, even though it appeared that the frost-haired Celt could barely remain upright from the first few steps that she had taken. He forced his way into the attack and found her avoiding him over and over, as though she were holding back a portion of her strength, which infuriated him as it was a clear example of her arrogant Gaijin condescension. He decided to stop playing around and forced his attack in earnest, but still she managed to stay just a half-step beyond the reach of his To, and so he failed to take notice of the perfect spiral pattern that the two of them were taking.

But then Erin surprised him with a wholly unexpected maneuver, striking not with her blade but rather using her hilt to form an upward thrust that he quite easily avoided...only in doing so all hell broke loose as a wind curled up from no where to encircle them within a raging cyclone.

Leona gasped as the whirlwind sprang up from seeming no where, as Erin cried out the words, "HIRYU SHOTEN HA!" and launched an attack that seemed to come at Tonada from a dozen different simultaneous directions.

The black-clad man was buffeted by what seemed like a hundred simultaneous hits, and at the end of it he was cut and bleeding from numerous gashes while the whirlwind suspended him high in the air above the Tendo dojo. He hung there for several long moments, only to have the whirlwind collapse as Erin sagged back to earth and once again began leaning her weight on her sword, while Tonada landed heavily some distance from her.

"Whoa," Ranma murmured, "Now that's fast..."

"No," Cologne murmured, "There was not enough heat generated, and her blows lacked sufficient strength to do him serious damage. I'm afraid Erin should have waited until she was more fully recovered before attempting such a basic attack against so strong an opponent."

Sure enough the black clad man began to chuckle softly, growing to a full laugh as she slowly got back to his feet, pulling off his mask to reveal his rugged features.

"Not bad...for a cripple," Tonada grinned, "I must admit I wasn't expecting you to do that, and if you had been serious it might even have finished me...but now you've lost, Hibernian, and your head is surely forfeit."

"Not yet," Erin frowned, her tone soft and even though her expression was icy.

"Kami-sama," Ukyo breathed, "He's not even badly hurt!"

"He was bleeding moment ago," Shampoo insisted, "But no bleeding now."

"Akane?" Soun turned to see his little girl standing rigid with a petrified expression, "What is it? What's wrong?"

Akane did not answer, but her expression was suddenly stricken as she stared at the exposed face of the black-clad man as though trying to place him from somewhere before. Leona saw her expression and took it for recognition, saying, "You know this guy?"

"No..." Akane said in dismay, "It can't be...!"

"Akane-chan?" Kasumi glanced at her sister, "What is it, what's wrong?"

Akane did not immediately respond, but her face was pale as she stared at the man with an expression that might as well have accused the man of being an evil phantom from out of her nightmares.

"Ready to give up yet?" Tonada asked as he extended his sword at the ready and prepared to charge his opponent.

Erin took another stance, turning her body partly away from him, taking her sword and placing it back in its wooden scabbard before saying, "Not bloody likely."

"Hiten Mitsurugi Ryu," Tonada mused, "Bathosai Technique...an interesting, if futile, attempt to turn your weakness to an advantage."

"Ye think so, do ye?" Erin replied, "Then come ahead and try me."

Ranma stared at the two opponents, eyes wide as he studied their body positions and felt the lines of tension balanced between them. The fight was about to be decided in a single stroke when-unexpectedly-Akane suddenly balled her hands into fists and started screaming her head off.

"Eh what?" Ranma gasped aloud.

"Akane?" Ukyo also turned to stare in non-comprehension as the youngest Tendo girl sank to her knees, fists clenched to her temples with eyes shut tightly as if to staunch the flow of memories that suddenly flooded through her.

"What's with her?" Leona wondered aloud.

"Not know," Shampoo replied, "Akane acting very strange all afternoon."

"Akane-chan, what's wrong?" Kasumi asked as she and Nodoka knelt beside her.

"You must be upset about something," Nodoka reasoned, "Is it about postponing the wedding?"

"N-No!" Akane shrugged off their attempts to help her and got to her feet again, her eyes now full of intense emotion as she stared directly at Tonada, "It's YOU! I knew that I knew you from somewhere!"

"Interesting," Tonada said, "So you finally remember."

"Remember?" Erin's eyes narrowed into slits, "Ye've known the lass somewhere before?"

"Intimately," Tonada smiled, "We go back a number of years together, don't we, miss Tendo? You could not have been more than seven or eight years old at the time, but I remember you and all the fun times we had together."

"Of course," Nabiki said aloud, "It all makes sense now! You're the one who hurt my little sister!"

"Hurt her?" Kasumi blinked.

"Oh man," Leona winced, "That doesn't mean what I think it does?"

"I'm afraid it does, Sugar," Ukyo said darkly, "On top of everything else, it sounds to me like he's a molester."

"What?" even Genma sounded shocked by that last comment.

"You and...Akane?" Nodoka murmured.

"You hurt...my little girl?" Soun's expression was suddenly quite livid.

"Aiyaa," Shampoo agreed, her expression paler than before.

"You..." Ranma's fists began to tremble, and he lifted his gaze to show eyes only marginally less cold than Erin's, "You're dead...you hear me? YOU ARE DEAD!"

"Empty words, Saotome," Tonada pointed his sword their way, "You can't even come close to matching my speed, and my sword gives me the reach you lack, besides which you have never taken a life, while I have filled entire graveyards with fighters of your caliber, and some even greater! Yes, I knew her when your iinazuke was but a child grieving for the impending death of her mother...she had wandered off and gotten lost in the hospital because the rest of her family were too grief stricken to give her proper supervision. I made certain that she was returned no worse for the wear, after I had satisfied myself of the sort of woman she would grow into..."

"For which you suppressed her memories using Shin No Ippou Technique," Erin said in a voice as hard as flint, "That's why she did not remember you until now...the lass has been suffering from grief deeply suppressed, and not just because of the loss of her mother."

"But why did you do this to Akane-chan?" Kasumi asked.

"You mean why her and not you?" Tonada asked, "Target of opportunity...she was alone and unguarded, nothing more than that. I sensed the potential for greatness that was within her and...satisfied myself that she would never grow to be a problem."

"You monster," Nabiki hissed.

"Debatable," Tonada smiled, "I have watched your family for generations from the sidelines but never until now dared interfere because of the Evil Master who protected you," Tonada emphasized his point by stabbing at the still recumbent Happosai, who gasped a breath before slumping back to the ground once again, "But when he is gone permanently from the scene the rest of you will follow. I will finally be rid of your annoying bloodline and free a greater evil to do my bidding. That's why it hardly matters to me that you know how you will perish. I could have struck at you in the dead of night, like a true Ninja would, but that I will enjoy this so much better with you knowing who sends you to hell, and for what reason."

"What happened to ye generations ago should nay be of consequence today," Erin stood erect, her body relaxed but her tone as hard as iron, "Holding a grudge is for amateurs, else I'd have sought you out a long time ago, Hitokiri Jupei."

"Jupei," Tonada sniffed dismissively, "I haven't used that alias in years. The real Jupei died at my hands, and you will be joining him at last, and your favorite Hitokiri apprentice of the Hiten Mitsurugi Ryu, Himera Kenshin!"

"Himera was Jodenai's apprentice, nay mine," Erin said as she resumed her quick-  
draw Bathosai stance, "I thank ye for the compliment, but I'm still gonna take your head for what ye did to me patient."

"You think so?" Tonada resumed his stance, "Now that I've let you rest a bit your strength should be back almost to normal. To bad for you I don't plan on fighting you fairly."

"Eh?" Erin asked when a rifle shot rang out, and suddenly she staggered forward with a large red splotch forming about one shoulder.

"Sniper!" Ukyo cried, her eyes automatically tracking the direction of the bullet to a tree that immediately caught her attention.

"That's right!" Tonada cried as he rushed forward, sword at the ready, "And now you die!"

"ERIN!" Leona cried out, only to have a blur pass her right by before she could even take a step forward.

Tonada was no less surprised to find his forward momentum checked by the sudden explosion of pain that erupted from one kneecap, pitching him forward into the dirt as he lost his grip on his sword and went sprawling face-first.

Cologne straightened herself out next to Happosai and glanced at Ukyo and Shampoo, "You two had best be going before anyone else becomes a target."

"Right," Ukyo and Shampoo nodded their heads, turned right around and sprinted for the wall like a pair of twin blurs.

"Hey, where are you...?" Leona started to gasp when the sound of rifle shot rang out again, kicking up dirt near to where the two fighters had formerly been standing.

"Everybody get to cover fast!" Genma cried, following his own advice, only to see one figure lunging forward, to which he cried, "Tendo-kun!"

"HE HURT MY AKANE!" Soun cried as he all but pounced on Tonada, lifting the man up boldly off his feet and slamming him hard against the dirt in an inverted position.

"Daddy!" Nabiki cried just before a rifle shot kicked up the dirt near to where her father was standing.

"Father!" Kasumi called out at the same instant.

"Dad!" Akane finally broke through her own lethargy and started forward.

"Mister-Tendo!" Ranma cried, dodging where his instincts warned him the next shot would ring out and wishing he had some way of striking back against that sniper.

Soun was beyond thinking of his own welfare as he threw the Immortal up against the nearest solid object, which happened to be one of the wooden support frames of the dojo , "No one try and stop me! He's mine! He has to pay for what he's done!"

"Oh really?" Tonada grinned in spite of the beating he was receiving, and suddenly one hand filled with a dagger and he started to slash down, only to have his hand be intercepted by another.

"Watch yourself, Tendo-kun!" Genma declared as his beefy hand closed tight upon the wrist of the assassin.

"Saotome?" Soun was both surprised and stunned at how close he had come to being stabbed by an opponent.

"So the Panda has a backbone after all," Tonada snarled, and with that he brought both legs upward in a double-kick that knocked both men backwards before he flipped around and regained his footing, "You still haven't a prayer of defeating me, even with the Old Woman running interference."

"Interference you say?" Cologne eyed the man coldly, "Fine words for a coward who needs to use a hidden assistant to win his battles."

"I prefer to think of it as evening the odds," Tonada vaulted into a handspring roll, only to find a hurtling form bearing down at him with the wrath of vengeance plain upon her features. He barely had time to get his guard up before he felt the impact of Akane's fist on his forearm and then he went flying backwards to crash into the dojo-post and careen off of it like a soccer ball off a goal post.

Akane panted with nearly ten years of frustration and anger boiling up in her, and the rage on her face was of a nature that Ranma himself recognized all too well from the many times it had been directed his way. He almost would have pitied the man but for the flash of steel in his hand that warned him that the assassin still retained possession of his dagger. Torn between his conflicting instinct to protect Akane and his sense of self-preservation, he nonetheless leaped forward with the intent of intercepting the man if he intended to stab forward with his weapon. Instead-to his surprise-Tonada fell backwards as Akane lunged at him and planted his feet in her abdomen, adding to her momentum as he propelled her end-over-end in the direction of the wall, where she seemed destined to make a crashing impression.

"Akane!" Ranma cried, changing the direction of his forward lunge and increasing his speed by a fantastic degree, managing to barely get himself in the way in time to take the impact on himself as his body cushioned the blow for Akane.

"Wow," Leona was impressed, knowing instinctively how much that had to have hurt the boy, and marveling that he would take such punishment to defend a girl who seemed to utterly loathe him. She did not have long to marvel at this, however, for Tonada was on his feet once again and aiming to regain possession of his sword, only now there was another figure in his path, that of the short-haired girl named Tendo Nabiki.

"What is this?" Tonada asked, dagger held at the ready, "Everyone suddenly growing noble and heroic, or do you merely have a death wish?"

"Neither one," Nabiki said with icy calm that was belied by a drop of sweat that trickled down one temple, "But you hurt my sister, and no one gets away with that...no one."

"Eh?" Tonada halted his forward lunge, sensing danger looming up behind him and ducking barely in time to avoid the swipe of the katana gripped by a vengeful Nodoka. Tonada wasted no time kicking backwards in the space where Nodoka was momentarily open, knocking the woman off her feet and doubling her over.

"Nodoka!" Genma cried, only to halt his forward momentum when Tonada's dagger struck the ground between his feet. In the moment when he was thus distracted Tonada leaped forward and doubled Nabiki over with a blow to her gut that was as savage as it was unexpected, and then he grasped his sword and vaulted back to his feet, blade in hand and his face triumphant.

"None of you are a match for me!" he declared, "This is barely even interesting! Only the Hibernian could give me any sort of challenge, and none of you is in her league. Prepare to greet your ancestors in hell!"

"Not quite, Buster!" Leona declared as she suddenly appeared in the space between Tonada and Nabiki, her katana at the ready.

"What's this?" the man laughed in contempt, "Erin's Pup thinks she's fit to play with the big leagues? You barely even know how to hold that blade, let alone how to use it?"

"Oh yeah?" Leona asked as she edged backwards towards the dojo, "Why don't you try me?"

"I don't waste my time of you, girl," Tonada took a step towards her and raised his sword for an impending attack, "Immortal or no, you're still a beginner, and I am your master."

"A Masterbater more like it," Leona taunted, taking a couple steps backward while holding her blade at the ready, "Probably couldn't even get it on with a real woman if you begged her!"

Tonada's eyes gleamed with malice and he lunged forward, even as Leona leaped backward and managed by some miracle to maintain her footing as she landed on the steps of the dojo. Not discouraged by this, the assassin lunged forward with a stabbing leap even as Leona backed away, feeling the edge slice against her arms and ribs while missing any vital organs that might have impeded further movement. Ignoring the pain, she kept on darting backward, holding the sword up and at the ready as Tonada followed her all the way into the dojo.

Suddenly the man froze in place as he was about to strike again, his face registering shock and surprise as his muscles refused to obey him all of a sudden. Leona remained where she was, keeping her guard up but not bothering to try and counter attack as she smiled at the evil assassin, her eyes knowingly daring him to attack her as Tonada's gaze slowly rose up and took notice of the shrine that lay directly behind her.

"I see," Tonada mused after a tense moment of hesitation, "Very clever of you...holy ground impedes us both, and to further press ahead would be to incur the wrath of the Kami."

"I may be an amateur, but I know the rules, Buster," Leona taunted back, "No matter how bad ass you are, you can't go against me without reaping a whole hell of a lot of grief."

"True enough," Tonada backed away, "But if I do not seek to attack you, neither can you attack me. Obviously your intent is to delay me while your mentor recovers...a very wise ploy for your part. Unfortunately I do not intent to oblige you by waiting around for it to happen."

He turned and exited the dojo, only to find his way blocked by Ranma, who stood in the yard looking battered and beaten but with eyes as glinted as steel and an intent that was no less lethal.

"You hurt Akane," Ranma said, "You hurt my mother, and now you're gonna pay for all of it in spades."

"Really?" Tonada extended his sword with a smirk of contempt, "So how are you going to exact your revenge upon me? Your Anything Goes philosophy disdains the use of weapons, and you will never be able to defeat me barehanded."

"Ranma," Nodoka gasped as she got to her feet with Genma's assistance, extending the scabbarded katana that was their family blade, "Use this...it's your only chance."

"Mom?" Ranma moved to her side, only to have the sword thrust into his arms by his father.

"Do it, boy," Genma declared firmly, "Just remember everything I taught you, except the part against relying a weapon."

"Right," Ranma nodded, taking the sword firmly in hand before turning to face Tonada.

"How amusing," Tonada remarked as he stepped out into the yard a few paces away from the Saotomes, "Do you really think you know how to use that, boy? You've never taken a life in any of your battles, let alone lived through the centuries that I have, when a sword was the difference between a man and a corpse."

"Shut the fuck up," Ranma snarled with a savagery that brought a gasp from Kasumi, and immediately he bent down and assumed an identical crouch to the one formerly employed by Erin, "Let's do this!"

"You are imitating the Hibernian," Tonada frowned, "Impressive...you have even gotten the stance down correctly, a tribute to your Eidetic memory...too bad you've never seen the complete maneuver. I doubt very much you know how it must be properly executed."

"Try me," Ranma said, his eyes holding not a glint of emotion.

Leona blinked her own eyes at the sight of the young man taking a stance that she had seen Erin use on only rare occasions. The Bathosai was a quick-drawing maneuver meant to kill a man with a single stroke, and in Erin's hands it was unbelievably devastating. Seeing this mortal boy assume the same stance made her glance briefly to see Erin barely managing to prop herself up into a sitting position. The blood on her chest implied that her wound would requite another few minutes of healing before she would be back in full fighting action, in which time this Tonada character could literally slaughter everyone, which meant that everything hung on the boy named Ranma performing a maneuver that sounded like the very antithesis of everything his school stood for.

Yet strangely she saw a glint of hesitation in Tonada's eyes before he raised his sword and pointed it forward, leaning the edge along the space of his other hand with forefinger pointed in Ranma's direction. For an instant it was as if the assassin were seeing someone else standing in the place of Ranma, but then he lunged forward, moving with unbelievable speed, even as Ranma himself charged forward, reaching to his side and drawing the Saotome blade in a single blinding motion.

The movement was too quick for the human eye to follow, but suddenly Tonada was staggering forward as though struck from behind by a giant baseball back while Ranma sank to one knee several paces beyond the point of medium contact. Leona saw the savage cut across his shirt and middle long before the trace of blood appeared, then Ranma bent over and cupped his side with a hand, gritting his face in determination not to lose consciousness from the shallow cut he had just taken.

Tonada landed like a doll with the strings cut loose and for a moment he did not move while those who were able to gathered around to examine Ranma. Leona held her place, turning her attention from the boy to where the assassin lay with his head still attached to his shoulders and winced as she realized what that would mean in a few moments. Everyone else was busy doing other things like fussing over Ranma, his mother asking to see his wound while his father alternately clapped him on the shoulders and gave criticism to some imagined imperfection in his technique.

"Well done, boy," Genma declared, "But you carried your step a bit too far there, and you twisted your arm at the last minute, which threw off your aim a little."

"It was well executed just the same," Nodoka praised, "An almost perfect Bathosai, exactly as I taught you, Ranma. And that fellow actually thought you did not know anything about the use of a weapon."

"Are you badly hurt, Ranma?" Kasumi asked, "Should I call Doctor Tofu?"

"Naw, just a scratch," Ranma winced, "I'll be all right, but what about Nabiki and Akane?"

"Akane?" Soun glanced around from one fallen daughter to the other, "Nabiki...?"

"They'll be just fine," Cologne reported, glancing down in faint disgust, "As will this wretch when he regains consciousness and is back to annoying us all."

"You bloody fools!" Erin cried as she tried to lurch back to her own feet, "He's nay done yet! He'll be up and about at any second!"

"Too true," Tonada replied, chuckling softly as he pushed himself up off the ground, reaching for his sword as he grinned in their direction, "I knew you couldn't do it, Boy! Shedding blood isn't in you, you deliberately struck me with the back of your sword instead of finishing me as you should have! Congratulations...you're not a stone cold killer as yet...but I am!"

"Do tell," said a voice from directly behind him, even as Tonada felt something touch his back and glanced down in surprise to see the tip of the blade projecting from behind him.

"You know your problem, guy?" Leona asked as she withdrew her blade, then brought it back in both hands, "You talk too much!"

Tonada was momentarily paralyzed and tried in futility to twist about and bring his sword up into play when Leona executed a perfect slice, exactly as she had been trained in two grueling years of hard-edged sword practice. For a moment she maintained her stance with sword raised in the finishing stroke as her blue eyes glinted with bitter reflection of other times when she had been forced to do this, something that never became easy, no matter how evil the opponent.

Tonada's eyes seemed to beg the question of how an amateur could get the drop on him in such a manner, but then those eyes rolled up into their sockets as his head rolled backwards, then came clean off of his shoulders with a slight fountaining of blood caused by a still-beating heart muscle.

Stunned silence prevailed, during which time Nabiki managed to regain consciousness, as did Akane, who was being leveled up in the arms of her father. All eyes turned to Leona, who bowed her head and casually shook her sword to clean the blade from its length, then sheathed her sword and waited for the inevitable to happen.

"She...she killed him," Kasumi gasped, not quite able to make her mind register the truth of her own statement.

"And well executed," Nodoka said, "The poor thing...she doesn't look too happy."

"But why...?" Ranma started to say, when his eyes got very round, for a glow began to surround Tonada's body, which then slowly rose up off the ground, crackling with faint electricity that grew with intensity by the second.

"Everyone get down!" Erin cried as she finally managed to get her legs back under her, "Ye don't want to be standing upright when this happens!"

"When what...?" Nabiki started to ask, only to see the first flash of lightning spark around the body, and without hesitation she threw herself flat on the ground and watched with growing terror.

"God...I hate this!" Leona cried, even as all hell broke loose with the wrath of the heavens raining down upon her.

What happened next depended on who you asked, and at what point. The pyrotechnics that erupted were entirely centered about Leona, though occasional random strikes seemed to find Erin with uncanny precision. The crackle of electricity and thunder bathed the yard in an eerie light during which a kaleidoscopic light show played with the clash of samurai steel and the ghosts of long dead warriors to be seen and heard above the carnage. It seemed as if the localized storm went on and on for decades when in fact it was hardly more than a full minute. When at last the crackling subsided there was Leona crouched down on hands and knees with her sword at one side. The last sparks of energy emanated from the body, which fell to earth the next second as a lifeless carcass.

Silence prevailed another full minute after, during which Erin got to her feet once again and came to the side of her wayward apprentice. Leona seemed numb and unresponsive for several instants, but then she lifted her tired gaze at the slender hand being offered to her, and without a word she took it, allowing her mentor to draw her back to a standing position.

"Well done," Erin glanced down at the headless torso, then sniffed, "Now that he had coming."

"Wow," said Ukyo as she and Shampoo approached the yard, a body slung across the shoulders of the latter, "That was sure something."

Leona recovered enough to acknowledge the two of them, and their unexpected cargo. Combing her hair back out of her eyes, she asked, "Where did you guys get off to?"

In reply Shampoo dumped the body she was carrying into the dirt and said, "We find sniper and take her out. She sleep now but have big headache when wake up."

"Not as bad as he's having," Ranma winced as he came up to join them, glancing from Tonada to Leona, "You guys do that a lot?"

"Frequently," Leona winced, "It's all part of the price tag that comes with being Immortal."

"Is that it?" Genma asked, "No more hidden surprises? Nothing else jumping us out of the woodwork?"

"Not quite," Erin took notice of Soun, who was carrying Akane in his arms, "How is she, Tendo-san?"

"She's so still..." Soun stared down at his unconscious daughter, looking up at Erin, "Can you do anything to help her?"

"Wouldn't be much of a doctor if I said no," Erin waved to the house, "Better take her indoors and set her down in bed..."

There was a creaking noise, and then part of the ceiling in the living room collapsed, as did one of the support pillars, followed by the porch itself and the entire left side of the building.

"Ah..." Erin winced, "On second thought, better make it the dojo. Leona and me will clear up out here. Nodoka-san...better unroll a futon."

"That sounds like a very good idea," Nodoka sighed as she made her way towards what was left of the main house.

Leona pointed to the building and said to the others, "That's why you should never try this stuff at home...it's rough on the furnishings."

"No fooling," Ukyo sagely noted.

"Oh my," Kasumi remarked as she studied the damages to the yard and their house, "Do you know how much this is going to cost us this time, Nabiki?"

"Oh yeah," Nabiki sighed in obvious depression, "To the last yen."

"Nay to worry, luvs," Erin winked, "I have me a proposal that should straighten everything out, if ye care to give me a fair hearing."

"Oh?" came the collective sound of everyone within earshot, with the sole exception of Cologne, who was smiling obliquely while subtly giving Happosai a rap on the skull every time he looked near to regaining full consciousness. After all, there was no sense in letting the fool ruining everything while they were this close to a resolution...

Continued.

Comments/Criticisms/Can this Gordian Knot be Untied? shadowmane

What does Erin have in mind, and where do Immortals bury their bodies? And what's with all the references to an Anime series called "Roun'nin Kenshin?" (Nothing much other than the fact that I just got done watching the series and thoroughly loved it, and recommend it to anyone who likes a good Samurai action series.) That and other issues to be resolved next time when we present the conclusion of this particular crossover, so won't ye all kindly be there?

X

If you wish to check out my other works, Please check out my Fanfiction webpage at: . or it's mirror site at: . All related chapters of this series can be found there along with my other works. 


	6. Chapter 6

IMNerima6

Ill Met in Nerima

By Jim Robert Bader

(Inspired by the works of Rumiko Takahashi and the creators of the Highlander Series)

Part Six.

"First off," Erin began some hours later, after disposing of the body and head and taking time to change into cleaner clothing, "I feel inclined to take note of the way ye all handled yerselves in the midst of a real crisis. I'd apologize for ye having to go through all that, only it seems that Master Happy here was the target all along, which means, for once, that me and Leona were nae responsible for bringing misfortune on your house but acted as needful to avert a bloody crisis."

"Suure, lady," Nabiki said skeptically, "And I suppose taking his head off was the only way of resolving the crisis?"

"Nabiki," Kasumi chided, "That wasn't very nice..."

"But an accurate statement just the same," Erin said in amusement, "No doubt ye be wondering about that, and as ye've guessed by now, Leona and me be nae ordinary folk, and the lives we live be anything but ordinary."

"That's putting it mildly," Nodoka smiled, "I remember enough of my apprenticeship under you to know that you never do things by the book, Erin-san. That friend of yours who helped take away the body, I believe he works with the local police?"

"Good guess, Nodoka-san," Erin smiled, "Ye always were a clever one, and aye, he's an old friend who owed me a favor from way back, an' a scum-sucking slime like Tonada will nae be missed, seeing as he's wanted in connection with dozens of unsolved murders still currently on the books...and a good number that aren't on any books beyond that."

"So, you're saying that justifies giving him a clean shave from the neck down?" Ukyo replied, "I'm not arguing the point, but if taking heads is what being Immortal is all about, then I'm glad I'm only human."

"You got that right," Leona sniffed, "Aside from people coming after you to take your head, you gotta move around a lot and not put down roots in case people find out what we are and try locking us up to run tests and junk to find out what's makes us tick..."

"Sounds familiar," Ranma gruffly noted, "An' it ain't the sort of life I'd wish on anybody else."

"You mean you go through stuff like this all of the time?" Akane asked with a faintly appalled expression.

"Aiyaa," Shampoo nodded, "Is good thing to be able to have children and grow old with man you love...is no good live forever if you alone for rest of life."

"Yer preaching to the choir on that one, luvs," Erin smiled, "But there be nae point to wishing things were otherwise. I only regret that ye had to witness the end O' that fight, because it's never a pretty way for one of us to go, and we never go out quiet."

"No need to apologize for what you are, Erin," Happosai said with matter-of-fact ease in his tone and bearing, "Kami knows I never worry much about it, but then again I've never had to kill like that more than one or two times in the past, the first time being how I got the way I am today. I'm just glad that you were around to keep that Ronin from harming any one of my cuties. Now that would have been a real tragedy!"

"Indeed, Master," Soun replied, surveying the current condition of his yard from where he sat behind the low tea table of the living room that they were all gathered within, "At least no one else was seriously hurt, and that woman seemed willing to confess to her part of the crime...the only question that remains is why he and that assassin were hired to kill you."

"Actually, Tendo-kun," Genma noted, "I think the better question might be who wouldn't..."

"Indeed," Soun shared a smile with his old friend, "I hadn't thought of it that way, Saotome, but that would only narrow the list down to three fourths of the population of Tokyo, at least."

As Happosai glared at his two disloyal students, Cologne made a sound like clearing her throat and said, "I believe that you had something you wished to bring up regarding the current state of the engagements?"

"Aye, 'tis so," Erin noted, "Truth to tell, the idea seemed to suggest itself on the way to your place, but having seen you lot in action, I feel confident that what I be proposing to you is the best solution to the dilemma that confronts you...certainly better than the blind, bull-headed nonsense that you two worthless lunks crafted between yourselves while having one of your stinking drunken binges!" she glared meaningfully at the fathers, who shifted in their seats and seemed appropriately nervous.

"Solution?" Ranma's question held a bitter laugh in it, laced with forlorn hope and resignation, "What's that?"

"'Tis quite simple, really," Erin replied, "In the days O' me youth, when Britain were a free and independent land under nay dominion O' any petty, foreign tyrant or Caesar, we Celts had strong warrior traditions that recognized that love occurs 'twixt men and women regardless O' rhyme or logic, and the best anyone can do is to bend with this force rather than try to force love to accommodate the needs O' society in the institution O' marriage. I shared me own first husband with a lovely lass by the name O' Deirdre, and I loved her every bit as much as I did me darling Roland. The three of us together...I thought we were an invincible combination," she shook her long mane of hair and wore a faintly rueful expression, "If there's anything that's kept me sane over the years, it's living with the memory of what we had, which is why I know it could work with you lot."

"What?" Ukyo blinked her eyes.

"Aiyaa," Shampoo looked no less stunned.

"You've got to be kidding," Nabiki said in her usual droll tone of voice, while Ranma looked stunned and sat there with his mouth open.

"You're saying he should marry all of us?" Akane growled, "I always knew you were a pervert, Ranma..."

"Hold on here," Leona frowned at the girl, "Why is he a pervert? Erin's the one who just made the suggestion!"

"Because it's what he's always wanted," Akane snorted contemptuously as she glared at Ranma, "Your own personal Harem!"

"Is that so?" Leona challenged, turning to Ranma and saying, "Hey Dude, you wanna start your own Harem and have a bunch of girls fight over you day and night? Because if you want this psycho with you, then you're crazier than you look...!"

"What did you just call me?" Akane said in arched tones of indignation, "I can't believe you just said that!"

"Well I did," Leona turned back to Akane, "You wanna make something of it? Because I've only known you for a few hours, but what I've seen ain't been pretty! You hit the guy, yell at him, call him names and treat him like he was your own personal punching bag! He's got a weird condition that turns him into a girl, and you act like he does it deliberately, AND you treat his friends like dirt, or you own exclusive property rights or something. You're nothing but a selfish Bitch, and if I were him I'd give you the old heave-ho and never think twice about it..."

Akane's fist was halfway to Leona's face when Erin's hand intercepted it, and then the smaller Japanese girl was rudely hauled to her feet and forced to look the very tall woman in the eyes, which caused the anger in her to dissolve abruptly in the face of those icy green depths, which as much as said that anger would be a Very Bad Thing and that talking things our reasonably would be much preferred to a confrontation.

"I know that's yer Rage Syndrome talkin', not really yerself." Erin set her back down on the floor again and very sternly said, "Behave yerself or the next time ye'll get a spanking, ye got that?"

Akane wordlessly sat back down on the floor, looking up at Erin with an unusually chagrined expression.

"Leona," Erin said without turning around, "Go and work it off in the dojo."

Leona sighed and stood up, "All right, I'm going..." She paused mid-way to turning around and glared at Soun before saying, "You gonna tell them, or am I gonna have to?"

"Tell them...?" Soun blinked, "Whatever do you mean?"

"I mean the real reason you need to fix up Wonder Boy here with the Psycho," Leona replied before leaving them to ponder at the meaning of that statement.

Nabiki watched the dark haired Immortal go then turned and frowned at her father, "What did she mean by that, Daddy?"

"I-I have no idea," Soun avoided her stare but exchanged a nervous, guilty look with Genma.

"Father?" even Kasumi noticed the exchange and had a look of confusion at the implications.

"I see," Erin mused as she, too, regarded the hapless fathers, "So ye had an ulterior motive besides insuring your dojo got passed on within the family, eh? Leona obviously picked something up that the two of ye would rather not 'fess up to."

"Is this true?" Nodoka turned a questioning look towards her husband, "I thought Ranma's engagement to Akane was a matter of sacred honor."

"Oh, it is," Genma assured with a nervous, guilty expression, "We swore that we would unite the families..."

"It's our duty to see to it that the Anything Goes Ryu is maintained, no matter what else might befall our two houses," Soun added with an even less convincing expression.

"And for that ye be willing to condemn them to a miserable existence just to suit yer perverse notions O' honor?" Erin asked skeptically, "So hidebound are ye that ye ignored yer daughter's plight and the boy's suffering? Somehow I be thinking there must be more to the story than that. I think it's time to come clean and admit to your real reasons."

"Happy?" Cologne glared at her fellow Elder.

"What?" the little old man asked, "You think I had something to do with this?"

"No offense, Master Happy," Erin eyed him critically, "But it does sound a lot like something that ye might have a hand in."

The ancient Master folded his arms and glared sullenly at the table, but the withering glare of his fellow ancients he finally relented and said, "I suppose it has something to do with what happened about a hundred years or so ago...back when this Meiji era was just getting started and a lot of things hadn't been nailed down, like a lot of loose magic that hung over from the ages of anarchy that proceeded the rise of the Shoguns..."

"And as usual you were out to gather up as much of it as you could to increase your power levels," Cologne sourly noted, "And something bad must have happened...so bad that it even convinced these two fools that you call your students to agree to unite their families come hell or high water."

"How did you...?" Genma blurted, "I mean...whatever would give you that impression?"

"Because I've watched you clowns these last two years," Cologne replied, "And it only confirmed my earlier observations, made close to twenty years ago, before you even made your pledge to marry your children together. You are cowardly and short-sighted, viewing your own selfish needs before the welfare of even those closest to you, perfect reflections of your Master, whom I once had the misfortune of knowing in my own youth."

"Ah...well..." for some reason Erin seemed a bit sheepish as she continued, "'Tis a point I was about to raise meself, the thing that troubles me in all O' this...why two laggards as bereft of sense and wit as ye should insist on honoring one pact above all others. Soun I can understand...ye at least have good intentions on yer side, but Genma? What's in it but for a roof o'er yer head, which ye could have had with yer lovin' wife, afore yer house got bombed during the last attempt ye made to force these two together."

"Which is where we come back to you, Happy," Cologne glared at her fellow Elder, "You are the link that binds everything together, so you might as well come clean and reveal whatever it was you did that has made a union between the Saotome and Tendo houses so necessary?"

Happosai glared sullenly at the old woman, but in the light of the more intense glares that he was receiving from all around the table his resolve more-or-less fizzled out into nothing. Even Kasumi was regarding him with less than her usual air of benign detachment.

"Oh, all right," he growled sullenly, "But it really wasn't all my fault! Things just sort-of got out of hand, and how was I to know what it would lead to?"

"Keep talking," Erin said in her best non-committal tones, "We'll be hearing you out."

"Well then," Happosai said seriously (or as near to serious as he could get under the circumstances), "It all happened about a hundred and fifty years ago when two families were about to unite by pledging the son of one house to the daughter of another. This was long before I formerly became involved in these families directly, but I happened to be passing through the area when I was drawn to the happy sounds of a traditional wedding..."

"In other words you smelled the food and wanted to cop a feel with the Bridesmaids," Cologne surmised with matter-of-fact candor."

Happosai fumed indignantly, "Are you telling this or me?"

"Very well," the old woman desisted, waving a hand to indicate that he should continue.

"As I said," he resumed, "I was happening along when I heard the happy sounds of a wedding being performed between the daughter of one House and the son of another equally honorable family line. These two families would be important to me one day, but at the time I was ignorant of their special significance or why exactly the families were to be joined on that particular day. It seems that one of the families bore the auspicious family name, 'Gateway to Heaven,' while the other family was named for a 'Rice Plucking Girl...'"

"Tendo and Saotome," Nabiki interrupted, then when looks were turned on her she pretended to be unaffected and just heaved a casual shrug, "Well, this is about our families, right? That doesn't take any special insight to figure out."

"As I was saying," the little man glared all around the table as if daring someone else to speak out of line, and there were no further takers, "The lovely maiden being wed on this occasion was a beautiful Priestess whose family had been charged with defending a particular shrine in the Nerima area, a place where a powerful entity had been buried for close to a thousand years, and the joining of the two houses was all part of an elaborate ritual ceremony performed once in every century to reseal the pact and see that the entity did not wake up to ravage the descendants of the Samurai who had entrapped it. When the boy and girl were to be wed they would each take their respective emblems and family seals to remake the wards and enforce the being's entrapment. Those two emblems held great power, which could only be realized when joined, and then only by two warriors that were pure of heart and noble of bearing..."

"So O' course you stole those emblems to add to your own collection," Erin beamed at the old man with a gleam of mischief, "And thereby ruined the ceremony."

"It wasn't like that at all!" the little man protested, though the guilty cast of his eyes gave testament that Erin's statement was far nearer to the mark than he would like to have admitted, "I only wanted to examine the artifacts to determine if they were real or fakes. There were a lot of forgeries going around in those days and you could never be too careful."

"So, what happened after the demon-whatever woke up?" Ranma asked him drolly.

"Ah..." the little man winced, "Well, it was not too happy about being awakened from a good long nap, and as someone who can talk from experience on that end..." he glared meaningfully at the fathers, who found their interest suddenly wandering to other parts of the garden (Genma might have followed those parts to faraway places, but Nodoka merely touched her sword and he thought better of the matter), leaving their Master to continue, "...I can sympathize with why she was so cranky."

"SHE?" Akane blinked, "You mean this demon was a woman?"

"I wouldn't go that far," Happosai said soberly, unable to suppress a shudder, "Next to the entity, Cologne here's a raving beauty."

"Happy...!" the old woman at his side rumbled dangerously.

"So what did you do?" Ukyo asked with all the earnestness of one who wanted to hear the rest of the story."

"Well, what could any self-respecting Master of the Anything Goes School do?" Happosai asked, then before anyone could finish his statement for him he answered, "I stayed and helped them fight the entity, then assisted the noble pair as the boy and girl worked the ritual to reseal the creature away for another century. If they had not done so then their families would have been destroyed, and all their loved ones with them, but...there was a terrible price to be paid for victory. The entity, in her malice, cursed the unfortunate couple, a thing that would not have been possible had they performed the ritual before she came to full power."

"Aiyaa," Shampoo remarked in dismay, "What curse do to boy and girl?"

"Why nothing," Happosai replied, "Or so it seemed at first. But then the boy and the girl fell to arguing, and it became plain at once that their noble hearts had been tainted by the spite of the creature. They could no longer stomach to be in the other's presence and angrily declared that they would never be married. Their parents tried to insist on the union but they adamantly refused, preferring even to face the prospect of being disowned by their elders...and thus a once-in-a-century union was spoiled forever. The boy and the girl went their separate ways, each marrying another and fathering two lines that diverged from that point onward. It was all a malevolent plot by the demonic entity to insure that the next time it rose up there would be no united family to oppose it' terrible vengeance."

"How awful," Kasumi replied with a hand to her mouth, "To be denied their love like that...how sad it must have made them."

"But what about the families that came after these two?" Nabiki reasoned, "Surely there must be lots of candidates who could perform the ritual..."

"There is only one," Happosai shook his head sadly, "Though Tendo and Saotome are fairly common names in some parts of Japan, there is only one family of each branch who are descended from the boy and girl who last performed the ceremony. There have been many attempts over the years to unite the houses, but the Entity's curse has interfered time and again, spoiling each and every chance. It's now more than a century later, and the seals are growing weak once more, which is why the ritual will need to be performed sometime within this generation."

"Is that the real reason for all of this?" Ranma asked skeptically, eyeing his elders.

"I don't believe this," Akane complained, "You're saying that the reason you engaged us is because of some family curse?"

"Not just any curse, Akane-chan," Happosai clarified for her, "But one that would seal the fate of every member of the respective households of Saotome and Tendo, beginning with the older generation and working its way down to the youngest."

Soun and Genma looked properly frightened.

"It's gotten pretty bad over the years," Happosai resumed, "I've tried to do what I can to help make things better, I even took a wife to bind myself into the Saotome family, and my offspring did eventually marry a Tendo, but this was a rare instance where the Curse could be weakened, providing the opportunity for it to further diminish in strength over the years..."

"WHAT?" there were astonished yelps from all around and then Ranma sputtered, "W-what are you saying, Old Man? You don't mean...?"

"That our families are related?" Akane looked at Ranma, then they and everyone else in the room joined in with a mutual glare in the direction of the fathers, whose nervousness appropriately redoubled.

"I already knew this part meself," Erin sniffed in amusement, giving Ranma and Akane a sympathetic nod as she added, and "Ye both be second cousins on yer great-great grandfather's side. This became apparent twenty years ago when I learned aspects O' the story when I first encountered yer fathers and discovered the scalawags' secrets."

"I wondered what all that fuss was about," Nodoka mused with perfect calm, "The demon must have gotten loose when the seals on its tomb weakened, but fortunately we were all able to drive it back to sleep, after which you said something to the effect that the seals would not hold for long, possibly no more than another generation."

"And of course the time was perfect to finally reunite the houses," Happosai nodded sagely, "Only your brother went and jumped the gun a little, spiriting Mariko off over the objections of your fathers, refusing to do it properly since he didn't put much stock in the family curse and wanted nothing to do with our traditions."

"Hikaru-kun," Genma's eyes welled up with tears, rivaling those often displayed by Soun, "How you broke your little brother's heart running away like that and leaving me to take up the mantle of the heir to our family's Ryu..."

"Oyagi?" Ranma's eyes bugged out.

"Uncle Saotome has a brother?" Kasumi blinked her eyes, showing the extent of her confusion.

"And he's not even the oldest?" Nabiki added in mild dismay.

"Hikaru, Oniisan," Genma sighed, "I don't like to talk about him...I've tried to forget how he hurt our father's pride, putting his own selfish needs before the welfare of his family, not to mention his only brother...!"

"You're a fine one to talk," Ukyo snorted derisively.

"It run in family, Shampoo think," the purple haired girl then turned a beatific grin on Ranma, "But maybe skip a generation with Airen!"

"Whoah," Nabiki made hand-signs, "Time out. Who's this Mariko?"

"My younger sister," Soun's tears resumed, easily overtaking those of Genma, "The light of our father's eye, the hope of our generation, lost to us before any of you were born. They eloped together and we never heard a word from either of them again, even to know whether they still live or have had children of their own."

"They did," Happosai said grimly, "You met them. Their names are Natsume and Kurumi."

There was a long silence all through the house, punctuated by a mutual cry of "SAY WHAT?"

"Natsume...and Kurumi...were our cousins?" Akane looked fairly stunned at the revelation.

"Well check it out," Nabiki mused, "Those two really were Tendo sisters...and Saotome!"

"Huh?" Ranma blinked, "But that would make them my...?"

"Cousins?" Akane finished for him.

"Aiyaa," Shampoo exclaimed, "Food Thieves is blood kin to Airen..."

"Who would have imagined?" Ukyo smirked, "That Kurumi sure had the appetite of a Saotome..."

"But..." Kasumi hesitated, "They said that they were orphans...that means...oh my!"

"Master?" Soun looked imploringly at Happosai, who had the decently to lower his own gaze.

"I'm sorry I never told you about it, Soun, my boy..." the old man sighed, "I didn't want to shatter your hopes that Mariko might still be alive, and Hikaru with her. They passed on before the girls were even old enough to know their real parents...it's a tragic story, and maybe I'll tell you about it one of these days..."

"I see," Soun replied, lowering his own gaze as he seemed to study the woodwork of the table, tears forming in his eyes at a gentler rate than his usual floodgates.

"But I don't understand," Akane said helplessly, "If our families were already united..."

"Weren't you listening, Akane?" Genma asked, albeit not as gruffly as he would his own son, "It wasn't a proper marriage, and our families disowned them. They didn't perform the ritual of Union but left it to another generation."

"Yes," Soun brightened, "But happy fortune blessed us with another chance to unite our divided families with Saotome's boy engaged to my Akane."

"True," Happosai remarked, "For the first time in generations we have an heir to each house who is of the opposite gender, and since I've been keeping the two artifacts-strictly for safekeeping, you understand..."

"But of course," Nabiki rolled her eyes, "Perish forbid that we would ever think it was for less than honorable motives..." she paused before adding, "Ah...are they valuable?"

"Priceless," Erin remarked in amusement, "If you consider that they're the only things that've kept your family from being ravished by a vengeful demoness."

Nabiki considered this for several seconds, greed warring with self-preservation before she slowly nodded, "A good point. After all, you can't put a price on family honor..."

"Okay," Ranma sighed, "Who are you and what have you done with the real Nabiki?"

"Well forget it!" Akane rose to her feet, "I'm not getting married just because some dumb old Demoness cursed us a long time ago! There's no way I'm having any part of this! Get someone else to do your dirty work..."

"Does it actually have to be Akane?" Ukyo asked in stage whisper.

"Is true," Shampoo nodded, "There two more Tendo sisters, both much nicer to husband than Akane."

"HEY!" she whirled on them with a look of accusation.

"They have a point, Daddy," Nabiki remarked, "It could just as likely be that the obligation should go to either me or Kasumi."

"NABIKI!" Akane whirled on her with hurt accusation in her expression.

"Excuse me?" Nabiki asked drolly, "You did say that you didn't want any part of this, right Sis?"

Something in Akane seethed to the surface, and the long period of dormancy between fits of rage finally broke. She a snarl borne of countless times when she had seen her older sister assume that smug look of superiority caused her to ball a fist that rocketed towards Nabiki's face before the latter had time to blink. Fortunately for the middle Tendo sisters a hand shot out and caught that fist before it came within an inch of the astonished Tendo Mercenary.

"That be enough!" Erin spoke calmly but firmly as she rose to her feet and twisted Akane around before tapping her sleep-spot from behind, which caused the youngest Tendo sister's legs to sag as though she had become suddenly boneless. Erin eased her down then laid her out on one side of the room, accepting a pillow that Kasumi promptly provided to prop Akane's head off of the floor while Nabiki turned an astonished look in her sister's direction.

"What...?" Nabiki finally shook herself loose from the state that she was in at losing her normal armor against her younger sister's rages.

"Y'know Nabiki," Ranma growled without looking at her, "All the times you accuse me of not thinking about the stuff I say, you'd think you could apply that lesson to yourself someday?"

"He's got a point, Sugar," Ukyo noted, "For somebody so smart, it looks awfully dumb of you to bait Akane."

"Sneaky girl no so smart after all," Shampoo said with a contemptful sniff in her direction, "Even Shampoo know you no give insult like that and no expect...what is word, Great Grandmother?"

"Retaliation," Cologne replied, "And in the future it would be wise not to underestimate the extent of Akane's diminished self-control over her anger."

"Well said, Cologne-chan," Erin sighed, "Which brings us back to the point that I was originally going to make O' what I think ye should be doing to unite the families and see to it everyone's honor be satisfied."

"Like how?" Ranma asked, "If you know something I don't lady..."

"Now that be a loaded statement," Erin winked, "I can see why the lasses fall for ye so easy...ye can be awfully cute while being so utterly clueless."

"You got that right, Sugar," Ukyo grinned, much to Ranma's discomfiture, while Shampoo snickered and Nabiki paid him one of her trademark sardonic expressions.

"To return to me point," Erin said matter-of-factly, "Yer problem, as I see it, stems from ye having been given t'too many conflicting commitments, largely on account O' yer Sire being a Baka, but mostly due t'ye having way too much natural charm an' charisma. In the old days this could be resolved by having it out among the lasses, an' the better one was the winner take all, only that tended t'make losers out O' the ones nae so well favored by the Gods. A better alternative, one we Celts practiced in such situations, was t'seek Unity out O' discord, t'set aside our differences and learn to work together!"

"Together?" Ukyo repeated.

"What you mean?" Shampoo asked curiously.

"We had a name for it in me time," Erin resumed, looking at each of them for emphasis to her point, "We called it a Sacred Band, or Warrior's Circle. A Warband, if ye will, but one united in peace an' domestic tranquility rather than battle. It was a pledge between warriors to honor an' commit t'one another, t'be as one flesh and heart like hearth-born sisters. Ye share the same man and he honors ye both as yer husband, an' ye all agree t'live an' abide by one another as a family unit, with all duties and obligations being shared equally between ye."

"Oh my," Kasumi said aloud, "Isn't that awfully close to being illegal?"

"Not necessarily," Nodoka said practically, "Samurai in earlier times often took multiple marriage partners, and a warrior of Ranma's standard is too much of a man to be spoiled on only one woman."

Soun and Genma had seemed on the verge of voicing protest, but both were silenced by this comment on the part of the Saotome matriarch. Both men looked owl-eyed in her direction as if neither one of them had been prepared to hear her going along with this...unconventional proposal.

"What Nodoka-chan says is the plain, unvarnished truth," Erin replied, "Samurai men could take both wives and mistresses and have them live under the same roof, or marry concubines in addition to their wives, just as women could take male lovers on the sly and none be shocked by their behavior. As ye all have demonstrated that ye have true and noble hearts it only make sense to call upon the traditions of yer ancestors an' accept that the fates hae decreed that ye belong together. Surely there be no sin in acknowledging what already exists? Ye showed yer true commitment when ye fought side-by-side together for the sake O' yer loved ones, pullin' for each other an' risking yer lives to guard each other in a crisis."

"Aiyaa," Shampoo said, nodding vigorously to Nodoka's comment, "Shampoo think Ranma much, much man! Him what Shampoo want most in whole world, but...is not uncommon for Amazon womans to agree to share husband, if they be sworn sisters."

"Very true, Child," Cologne said sagely, "Such a thing has been allowed on numerous occasions where two warriors of equal standing share a conflicting obligation. If you were to agree to take Ukyo on as your sister it would be well within your rights and none of our tribe would dare to gainsay you."

"And because Amazon marriages do not require a formal acknowledgement," Erin continued, "This would free the lad to marry Ukyo officially and thus claim both of them for his true beloveds."

"W-W-Waitaminute!" Ranma stammered, "BOTH of them? I mean...you want me to marry both girls?"

"'Tis one possibility among many choices that ye have, lad," Erin supplied, "All depends on how ye feel about these lovely lasses. Each O' 'em seem more than agreeable t'having ye on the best of all possible terms, an' each seems willing to compromise for the sake O' havin' a future with ye at all. Of course if ye find them disagreeable companions, then there be always another who I judge may fit the part as well as any other."

With that she turned an amused glance in Nabiki's direction, who seemed caught unprepared for the sudden shift of focus and attention that instantly followed this gesture.

"Me?" she squeaked, her voice pitched an octave or two above her normal ranges.

"An' why not ye?" Erin asked, "Ye alone O' all yer house were willin' t'do whatever it took to see to it yer sister receives proper medical attention, and ye alone seemed prepared t'even acknowledge that she had a problem in the first place. Ye were even ready t'risk yer life an' limb t'help out when ye saw yer loved ones bein' threatened. I be also much aware O' how ye keep stealing glances at young Saotome when ye think no one is watchin', an' though I maybe as old as some hills, I be nae so slow in me wits that I cannae read honest emotions in yer regard O' him. That an' the fact that ye've been frettin' th' whole time that his engagements even be mentioned."

"Huh?" Nabiki glanced down and became aware that her hands had been fraying the fringes of her shirt and she immediately willed them to stop unraveling the loose threads there. She tried to compose herself and put her stoical mask back into place but a single look around the room convinced her that it was a lost cause to pretend to still feel neutral.

Even Kasumi seemed to recognize that Nabiki was being affected by the conversation, and she raised an eyebrow to this without comment, while Nodoka was beaming with motherly pride and encouragement in Nabiki's direction. Her father and Uncle Genma were both looking stunned as if just then considering the prospects, and even Ranma seemed to be studying her in a different way than he usually did...and he had the worst poker face of anyone present!

Still, pride and a long habit of defending herself against the vagaries of her heart schooled her to adopt an indifferent matter as she coolly said aloud, "Why would I have any stake in what happens to Ranma? I'm no Martial Artist, so I couldn't care less who inherits the dojo."

"Ah," Erin said sagely, clearly not buying the disclaimer, "Now that be a damned shame, an' here I thought at least one of the lad's brides should have her feet firmly planted in the here and now. An' here I thought ye might be a valuable asset t'the others since including ye in the arrangement would go a long ways towards satisfyin' yer family's honor, t'say nothing of helpin' avert a tragedy that looms large o'er yer family an' loved ones. Ah well...perhaps ye might still be interested in bein' their financial adviser, especially in light O' the fact that th' boy's destined t'inherit a considerable fortune."

"Well," Nabiki fidgeted under the collective weight of everyone's scrutiny, "I'm sure I could help out now and then...did you say fortune?" she blinked.

"Aye, that I did," Erin smiled as she turned to regard Nodoka, "Did ye nae know that yer cousin Nodoka here has a wealthy father who bequeathed in her name some sizeable holdings on the express stipulation that nae a yen O' it e'er wind up in the personal possession O' her husband? Granted I do nae know all O' the pertinent details, but last I heard, it was her son who was intended t'come into his own when he reached college age an' had graduated from High School. I did some background checks on th' way here an' spoke t'an accountant friend O' mine who assures me that the estimated net worth O' the lad be around a cool four or five hundred million...in yen, O' course."

"FOUR OR FIVE...?" It was not often that one could see Tendo Nabiki totally frazzled by a discovery of this nature, but she recovered her bearings almost instantly and seemed to be thinking something over while the others just continued to stare at her, some in concern or amusement, one or two showing evidence of worry, and a third only giving every indication of tacit resignation.

But then Nabiki surprised everyone as she chewed her bottom lip before glancing down and saying, "I'm sorry...I couldn't...marry him under those terms. Ranma knows how much I'd be affected by the lure of all that money and I...I couldn't stand to have him think that was all that I was after."

"Nani?" Ranma looked stunned, which was only mildly understated when compared to the frank disbelief that colored the faces of rest of those present...all save Nodoka-who looked faintly disappointed-and Erin, who grinned openly and nodded in approval.

"That be a fair admission for ye, Tendo-san," Erin "Money is a lure that can spoil or make many a relationship, an' a marriage without love be nae better than a business arrangement. Ye do yerself credit t'face that fact outright, but I'd be less inclined t'dismiss the possibility were I in yer place...an' believe me when I say that I have been there more times than e'en I can remember!"

"Pardon?" Soun glanced up at Erin, "And just what makes you so qualified to advise my daughter on the matter of an engagement?"

"Other than the fact that I've buried twelve husbands an' I know nae how many lovers in me time?" Erin replied coolly, "I know well an' truly about love, Tendo-san, it's mysteries still enchant and enthrall me, an' I ne'er tire of seein' it take new an' original forms, as it has with this lad an' these three lasses. The boy seems destined t'be a magnet for trouble, but I'm a fair judge when I say that any one O' these girls would jump through hoops O' fire t'be a part O' his existence."

"Is that true?" Kasumi turned to her younger sister, "Would you jump through hoops of fire for Ranma, Nabiki?"

"Ah..." Nabiki cringed somewhat, "Maybe...if they were very small hoops, and I didn't have to do much leaping..."

"Oh no, Sugar," Ukyo smiled, "You'd want those hoops to be large enough to fit through, and you'd definitely want a running start to leap through them."

"Mercenary girl better learn to leap quick if she want a part of Airen," Shampoo noted with a hint of real mischief, "At least Nabiki no violent girl, only take from Airen's wallet and leave the rest for Shampoo to play with."

"Huh?" Nabiki blinked her eyes then said, "Wait a minute..."

"So what about it, lad?" Erin turned back to Ranma, "Ye could have a dream bargain in th' offin', three lovely lasses willin' an' eager t'take ye for a husband, a dream many a man would kill t'have, an' all yours if ye truly want them."

"But...but I...I...I..." Ranma stuttered helplessly, then stood up from the table, "I've gotta think about it. Do you mind if I take some time to do that?"

"Sure enough," Erin replied, "Take all the time that ye want..."

"Just so long as he agrees to marry my daughter alone!" Soun fumed, "How dare you propose that my little girl take a back seat to any-off!"

"Oh, father, I'm so sorry," Kasumi said apologetically as she held an incriminating glass in her hand that had held iced team up until a moment prior, "How very clumsy of me! Please allow me to clean that off before it stains your gi..."

"What stain?" Ukyo asked sarcastically, "It's already brown!"

"Is no even noticeable with all sweat stains it already have," Shampoo said seriously, "Shampoo maybe teach nice-nice Kasumi Amazon way for removing stains from clothing, you like?"

"Oh yes," Kasumi smiled radiantly back at the Amazon, "That would be ever-so-  
helpful. I just know that we're going to have a wonderful time being sisters-  
in-law, Shampoo-san."

"Sister-in-law?" Nabiki blinked, "When did that happen?"

"Don't wander off too far, lad," Erin noted, ignoring these exchanges, "I'd like the chance t'tell ye the rest O' me proposal, if ye care t'hear the details."

"Uh, sure..." Ranma acknowledged, pointing out into the garden, "I'll just be in the dojo if anybody wants to find me...y'know, like somebody who wants to kill me or something. I could use something like that to relax me."

"Sure, Ranma-kun," Kasumi said with complete matter-of-fact candor, "We'll just tell them to wait around until you finish stretching before they can give you a work out."

"And if more than one of them shows up at the same time," Nabiki added in mild sarcasm, "We'll just tell them to take a number."

"Yeah," Ranma gave the middle Tendo girl an almost friendly nod before adding, "Wonder why I never thought of that before. Would have helped to organize things a little..."

As he rounded the corner and headed over towards the Tendo dojo he heard Ukyo ask the others, "Is it just me or does Ranchan seem a little spaced about the whole thing?"

"Aiyaa," Shampoo agreed, "Airen seem very moody...maybe him hungry? If so, then Shampoo cook delicious meal. If...if spatula girl want help, Shampoo no mind it."

"Ah...really?" Ukyo replied, sounding intrigued.

Ranma let out a sigh of relief at what sounded like the girls getting along together, which was at least one change to his normal routine that he welcomed. Having people fight over him all of the time got pretty old a long time ago and the novel experience of Shampoo attempting to be friends with Ukyo was definitely a right step in a more desirable direction.

Of course that brought home the point that the reason they were getting along was that they were attempting to adjust to the concept that they might soon be sharing a husband, namely Ranma. He was more than a little bit confused of what his feelings were concerning that, but he had to admit to himself that it did seem more desirable than having to choose one girl and risk being hurt by all of the others.

Good thing Kodachi was presently in the hospital receiving medical attention or she might have busted in on affairs and sought to put her own two cents in, which would have resulted in one massive blowout that made the one they had just come through seem pathetic.

The idea of including Nabiki in the same package...that was another issue that was likely to cause him long hours of sleepless indecision!

How did he feel about any of these girls who wanted to marry him? It had been so long since anyone had even bothered to ask him for his opinion that the thought of actually being allowed to choose was almost frightening, far moreso than any fight with which he had ever been confronted. Ukyo, Shampoo and Nabiki were all fine girls, and each had very attractive points well worth considering, but how exactly did he feel about them as potential marriage partners. Ukyo was his best friend, Shampoo was incredibly cute, loyal and devoted, while Nabiki...she had a kind of crafty charm that he had secretly admired even when he was the brunt of many of her schemes gone sour. A guy would have to be nuts not to fall for at least one of these girls, so why was he being favored with the prospect of having all three of them together?

And what about Akane? Could he really set her aside so easily after having made a commitment to her that was as much by choice as a point of honor? Granted that he had agreed with Erin's assessment that a marriage with her was unlikely to be healthy, but they had gone through so much together...so could he really turn his back on the girl he once thought that he had loved simply because she was having problems and needed to get better?

As he approached the dojo thinking all these thoughts he was more than a little surprised to detect movement from within, and as he came closer he saw that it was Leona working out, performing a slow and rhythmic kata with her sword in both hands, slowly going through the motions of a complicated workout. As he drew closer he could hear her breathing in and out with slow and steady inhalations and exhalations, and while her movements were far from polished he had to admit that she had the basics down and was handling herself very well...for a novice.

She paused at the end of one kata, however, and without turning around she said, "You can come in, I'm almost finished."

Ranma was astonished at being detected by her and at once asked, "How did you...?"

"I've got pretty sharp hearing," Leona replied as she turned around to regard him, "You don't make too many sounds when you move, but your cloths have a slight rustling sound that's pretty distinctive. The only other guy I've met who wears silk is that purple haired chick, and she walks differently than you do...at least while you're doing your guy thing."

"Oh," Ranma decided to accept the explanation at face value, though he appraised that the raven haired American girl would have to have extraordinarily good hearing to have detected the sounds silk made when moving. He himself could detect such things in time to avoid an attack, but he'd had the benefit of a lifetime of training when-by this girl's own account-she had only been practicing the martial arts for the better part of two years now.

Since it didn't seem manly to ask her about that, though, he instead chose to focus upon the other thing that he found disconcerting, "I thought you said you couldn't fight while you were in here?"

"I can practice fighting, which isn't the same thing," Leona answered as she sheathed her sword behind her back, causing the handle to disappear in her black mane of hair, "It's the intent to hurt and kill that can't work while I'm on holy ground. Immortals can't kill each other whenever they're near to something holy or sacred...something about the ley lines getting messed up if one of us croaks and unleashes the quickening. According to her, the last case known where two Immortals fought next to a sacred idol was on the Island of Krakatoa, right when it went BOOM! I wouldn't want a thing like that to happen here, any more than that bastard, Tonada."

"Ah...the guy you chopped up, huh?" Ranma said uneasily, not liking to remember the sight of the Ninja's head falling from his shoulders only seconds before all hell broke loose in the yard outside of the dojo, "You do that kinda thing often?"

"Just a couple of times over the last two years now," Leona shrugged, then amended, "Or maybe six. I don't like killing, I don't like hurting anybody, but sometimes...they don't give you a choice, y'know? As if you beat them and leave 'em lying around, then they just come after you again and sometimes they go after other people to get at you. That's why Erin insists that the only time two Immortals should fight is when they're serious about finishing it, or else they should try and work things out another way. It's Mortals we're really supposed to avoid hurting since that can sometimes come back to haunt us."

In spite of himself Ranma found himself relaxing a bit on hearing the girl's admission, "Yeah, but if you really did kill 'em, then it's like saying you had a reason to fear them, and I'm not afraid of anybody. If somebody wants to come at me a second time, then let 'em. All it means for me is just more practice."

"Pretty cocky attitude," Leona inclined her head, "You really that good?"

"I'm the best," Ranma replied matter-of-factly.

"Don't say that around Erin," Leona warned with a wry grin, "She might try you out to see how good you really are, and I've never seen anyone beat her in a fair fight. There's a lot more going on with her than she ever tells me, but I pick things up by watching her on the sidelines."

"Ah..." Ranma hesitated before continuing on, "What the deal with you guys? Is she like your legal guardian or something...?"

"She was," Leona admitted, "Until I turned eighteen, then...well...she's kind of like my Mentor, only there's a...lot more going down between us besides that. I dunno...she's more like a big sister to me than a parent. I lost my folks two years ago in a car wreck, and since that time...well...Erin and me have been together. She teaches me all kinds of stuff besides how to use a sword and how to fight without weapons...kinda like a little of everything really...literature, art, science, math, history-she's really big on history 'cause she lived most of it herself-and, oh yeah...she's also taught me a few things about magic. Not much in the way of spells and stuff like that, but more like how to read nature and interpret the signs and things like that."

"That sounds great," Ranma said with honest enthusiasm, "It's been ages since the last time Pop and me went on a training mission. I kinda miss having the stars over my head at night, even when I'm sleeping on the roof of the dojo..." his expression fell as real life pressed in on him once again, "Not sure where I'm gonna be sleeping in the future, or if ever..."

"Probably not," Leona replied with complete candor, "She give you the big speech about the 'Sacred Marriage Band' thing that she used to have before she became an Immortal? She's told me a lot of what life was like for her when she was my age..."

"Uh...yeah," Ranma admitted, "Pretty much."

"Don't let it get to you, guy," Leona patted his arm in a friendly gesture, "She can be pretty intimidating when she wants to be, but Erin's a big pussy cat when you get down deep..." she saw Ranma shudder and amended herself, "Oops! Sorry about that! I forgot you have a thing about...felines."

"You could say that," Ranma tried to control himself but the image of the tall ice blonde Celt sprouting ears and a tail was a difficult one to resist, especially in light of his experiences with the Beneko.

"Well, cheer up and don't complain so much," Leona turned away and stared performing a slow-kata, "You may have had it rough in the past, but life should be pretty good with two great looking girls fighting for your attention. I know you probably don't feel comfortable being forced to deal with all this crap, but things could be a lot worse for you, especially if you married that Akane."

"Ah...yeah," Ranma decided that she probably had the right idea and moved a bit away from her so that he could begin practicing his own kata, "By the way...you figured out yet why your Japanese improved so much?"

"Pretty much," Leona said without missing a motion, moving her hands and legs in slow and perfect precision, "Did you know this place has a guardian spirit looking over it? Well, she came to me and did something that helped me to understand you better. She's right here now watching over us...I can feel her on the edge of my mind, and I can tell that she likes you."

"Huh?" Ranma almost missed a motion and staggered, recovering himself at once as he resumed his motion from the beginning, "She does? But who...?"

"Erin says that people...meaning Mortals, don't really disappear when they die," Leona replied, nodding towards the shrine that held a place of honor in the dojo, "Some part of them lives on, and I think she's been looking after her family from the spirit realm, so she knows what's going on here, even if she's just a memory to some people."

This time Ranma almost fell over in his surprise and was a bit slow to recover his bearings, turning to the shrine and saying, "MRS. TENDO?"

"Yeah, I think that's who she is," Leona said as she completed her motion and looked at him, "You knew her?"

Ranma shook his head negatively, "We never met, but I've heard lots of stuff about her. To hear Mister Tendo and Kasumi go on it's like she was a saint or something. You mean...she's actually here? She can hear us?"

"That's about it, Sport," Leona nodded, "I can't really hear what she thinks or she's saying because I'm not into that channeling stuff or nothing, but I can tell she's feeling positively towards you. I think she wants you to look after her daughters...all of her daughters, and not just Akane."

"Wow," Ranma glanced around at the empty spaces surrounding them, "All this time and I never even suspected..."

"Look, it's really none of my business," Leona said, "But I think you should know that girl named Nabiki likes you. She sure was sending off pretty hot vibes when we were in the room together. That Akane..." she shook her head, "I don't think I want to know what's going on in her mind! She's just so full of rage and self-pity...not that I can blame her, 'cause I've felt pretty much like that on occasion."

"Really?" Ranma asked, both surprised at the admission and what was mentioned regarding Nabiki.

"Sure," Leona sighed, "When my parents got divorced it pretty much felt like the end of the world, and then when Mom started seeing another guy...it's like I wanted to kill him on general principles, and not just because he turned out to be such a bastard! Then Mom and Dad tried to make up, only to wind up in that car wreck...it just wasn't fair!" She made a motion with her hands and then gave up the effort, "I just wanted to get away from it wall, which is probably part of the reason that Erin took me on this world trip. She said I needed more life experience, but so far it's like we go from one crisis situation to another! Man, you won't believe some of the places she's dragged me through..."

"Try me," Ranma said drolly, "At least she doesn't sell you for food or seek to engage you to anybody."

"There is that," Leona conceded, "But mainly I think that's 'cause she wants me for herself...well, that's nobody's business, okay? I just feel sometimes like I want to be normal...is that too much to ask?"

"I dunno," Ranma replied, "I don't even know what 'Normal' means! Normal seems...pretty boring...but sometimes I think I could live with the boredom..."

They shared an easy smile together, then Leona tapped his arm and said, "Tell you what, why don't we do a little sparring? I know you don't like to hit girls, and I'm sure not in your class, but you're supposed to be a pretty good teacher, so maybe you can rate me and tell me how much I've improved since this morning."

"Since this morning?" he blinked his eyes in wonder.

"Yeah," she said, looking uncomfortably away from him, "Whenever an Immortal takes the Quickening from another Immortal we gain all of their knowledge and power...which pretty much means we absorb stuff on an unconscious level. That's how I knew about the Engagement having something to do with unleashing a demon-  
thingie. Seems Tonada knew all about it, having been in the neighborhood when the old Pervert broke up that wedding."

"You absorb memories?" Ranma found the idea more than a little disquieting.

Leona simply nodded, "Yeah...makes me feel a little a Vampire, feeding off my own kind and all that, and the memories in that bastard..." she shuddered, "That's why I have to meditate after every quickening, to get ahold of myself...or my real inner self, so I don't get my memories too mixed up with his. After a while those memories just fade into the background until you don't even have to think about them to call up the knowledge. Of course him being a guy means he fights differently than I do, and since you know what it's like being a girl..."

"Not that I want to," Ranma admitted, "But yeah, I can see what you're saying. I guess it wouldn't hurt to work out a little, and I'll go easy on you until I can judge your level..."

"RANMA, PREPARE TO DIE!" a voice cried from the entrance to the dojo.

Leona blinked as she turned to see a young man who somewhat resembled Ranma standing in the doorway with his face contorted into enragement, then glanced back at Ranma and asked, "Friend of yours?"

"Unfortunately," Ranma sighed as he turned to regard the snarling new arrival, "What do you want now, Ryoga? I'm kinda busy..."

"I can see that, you two timing betrayer!" Ryoga declared as he shot an accusing finger towards Leona, "How dare you cavort with yet another woman when you're engaged to marry Akane? I'm going to make you pay for that!"

"HUH?" both Erin and Leona reacted, turning mutually puzzled expressions upon one another...

Continued.

Comments/Criticisms/Cycles of Ecstasy and Depression: shadowmane

Okay, so this was not quite the ending I had originally envisioned, which means that there will have to be at least one more chapter before I find a point of resolution, but I think this chapter helps cover some important aspects to the characters and issues at play (not to mention give you readers more info about my Immortal Pair of Erin and Leona, shameless plug!). Next time out helps to finalize Ranma's decision, and who is he going to actually wind up marrying this time? Surprises galore as Ryoga enters the picture and we have a few more plot points to resolve, so stay tuned for the next installment, and...be there! I think you'll like what I'm planning! ^_-

X

If you wish to check out my other works, Please check out my Fanfiction webpage at: . or it's mirror site at: . All related chapters of this series can be found there along with my other works.  



	7. Chapter 7

IMNerima7

Ill Met in Nerima

By Jim Robert Bader

(Inspired by the works of Rumiko Takahashi and the creators of the Highlander Series)

Chapter Seven.

Nabiki was lost in thought as she stared at her reflection in the mirror and tried to work around the concept that she was now officially engaged to Saotome Ranma. Her father had been talked into the arrangement, but it was not an exclusive contract like the pact made with Akane. In effect she had both Shampoo and Ukyo to deal with, but not in a confrontational sense as the proposal stated by Erin suggested more of a polygamous arrangement than an exclusively monogamous engagement.

How did she feel about all of this, and why the hell had she sat there and silently acquiesced to such a lunatic proposal? Sure the discovery that Ranma would inherit a fortune had been an enticing bit of temptation added to the pie, but the guy was a walking magnet for trouble, and in spite of being humbled recently he still had the same macho tendencies of the swaggering boy she so well remembered.

Marry Ranma? Was this really what she wanted? Sure he was handsome with a nice butt and there was kindness in his eyes that often appealed to her on a level that she tried fervently to deny, and of late she had been growing overly fond of the boy who was previously engaged to her sister, but...married? Hadn't she already sacrificed enough of her dreams to suit her father's peculiar obsession?

Marriage to Ranma meant uniting the families and keeping the dojo within the bloodline, but what did all of that mean to Nabiki? She was in no ways whatsoever a traditional minded girl, and her father's idiotic insistence on tradition made little sense to her. She was Tendo Nabiki, her own woman, free and independent in her thinking and by no means did she want to tie herself down with some brainless jock who did his thinking with his muscles. If that was all that she wanted in a man she could have had her way with Kuno Tatewaki!

But...married? She swallowed. The word seemed so...alien...and the thought of binding herself to any man was a wholly alien concept. How could anyone expect for her to carry such a responsibility on her shoulders and know what to do about it?

Marry Ranma, her? "When Pigs fly" would have at one time been her reaction.

And yet...

Memories resurfaced of the warming smile that she used to see on Ranma's features, an expression less and less in evidence the nearer he came to marrying her sister. Ranma had lost much of his egotism and self-confidence over the last two years of their association, going from the cock-sure macho jerk that she remembered to a mere shadow of himself as Akane's mental stability steadily deteriorated. Try as he might he could not avoid setting off her sister's violent mood swings, and of late it had even become a life-threatening situation. She could still remember the naked fear that had gripped her heart when she thought her sister might have actually killed Ranma, a fear that had not gone away when he recovered. That fear had hung in her heart the closer they came to the date of the actual wedding, and every blow she witnessed against Ranma at her sister's hands caused Nabiki ever greater anguish.

Did that actually mean that she was in love with the jerk? How else to account for the way she had been acting around him lately?

"Me...in love with him?" she murmured softly, trying the best she could to come to some understanding of the nature of her feelings.

She was not like either Ukyo or Shampoo that she could easily and casually express her feelings. Even to admit that she had feelings was a dangerous concession that left her vulnerable before the sort of sharks she tended to swim with in the waters of Furinkan High School. Even though she had graduated near the top of her class a year ago, the old habits died hard as Nabiki sought to keep her family stable through all means fair and foul that she could manage. She had even sacrificed going to college in order to continue supporting their precarious lifestyle as the only effective breadwinner, and half of what she did to supply the rent money was not something she cared to discuss in polite company. Every time Ranma or Akane smashed something up it made their situation even more bleak than before, and if not for Aunt Nodoka coming through on those occasions it was very likely that they would have all starved to death or lost possession of the dojo. It was not as if Nabiki had not already made her share of sacrifices.

But was the reward for her clandestine service to be the hand of Saotome Ranma? That was the point where Nabiki's imagination failed her. The idea that she could take the place of Akane in the boy's heart seemed as far-fetched as the notion that she would agree to be his bride in the first place.

Especially seeing how Ukyo and Shampoo came with the package.

Okay, so Nabiki basically got along with both girls and even tentatively labeled them as "allies" (not necessarily as friends, but certainly not enemies). Ukyo was Ranma's best friend and most loyal of boosters, while Shampoo had been hopelessly in love with the boy for the better part of two years and had even defied her own cultural upbringing to be with him. Both girls had sacrificed as much, in their own ways, as Nabiki herself was doing, and with the reward being joint custody of Ranma...well...the next few years were promising to be anything but normal!

She sighed...who was she kidding here anyway? She knew very well that she had fallen in love with Saotome Ranma, fallen hard for his blue eyes and wild, untamed nature, his courage and his honesty appealed to her on a level that she had never previously acknowledged. Her denial of this fact was merely her reluctance to give up on her safe, sane, boring old status quo existence on the fringes of the madness that tended to swirl around him. In spite of his being her near total opposite in most matters, there was a lot they also shared in common, enough that she had found herself growing steadily more attracted to him...against her better judgement.

She looked herself in the eyes and softly murmured, "You Baka," but in truth she was not saddened by the thought that she might one day claim a boy like Ranma for her husband. She could make allowances for the other two girls, just as she could for the fact that her new iinazuke was also a part-time woman. Sure the proposal was an unusual one, but part of the challenge it represented appealed to her, enough so that she was willing to imagine the unthinkable. Every action in her past had lead to this moment where it all came together, and now that she could finally admit the truth to herself, that she was willing to do all that she could to make this arrangement work, however unlikely.

The only regret she had in the matter was her sister, Akane, who now had to live with the perceived rejection and dishonor of being dismissed as a fianc e. Her mental state was questionable at best, and in all likelihood she might very soon share a padded room next to Kodachi. Akane badly needed help, and it was all that Nabiki could do to provide what she knew about medical costs in order to find a good doctor. The fact that the Immortal Erin O'Shea had agreed to help gave Nabiki some comfort, though in truth she could not completely banish the thought that she had in some way betrayed and cheated her younger sister.

"I guess maybe it does fall on me after all," Nabiki said aloud, right before a tremor shook the building and she heard the sounds of a telltale explosion.

"Ranma!" Nabiki was up out of her chair and across the from at once, staring out the window to her room out into the gardens where-sure enough-she saw Ranma and Ryoga mixing it up in one of their usual fruitless engagements.

"Ranma," Nabiki was already out the door and heading for the stairs before the idea was fully formed in her mind, and mid-way to the stairs she saw Ukyo and Shampoo coming out of Kasumi's room with Nodoka and Erin close behind them. No one needed to say a word, for those who lived within this household or visited it on a regular basis would immediately recognize the sounds coming from the garden as having only one clear meaning.

Hibiki Ryoga was back in Nerima!

Leona stood amazed at the doorway to the dojo as the stranger attacked Ranma with a speed and ferocity that were nothing less than superhuman. The fact that the new arrival looked a little like the boy he was attacking only added to her confusion, yet the way that Ranma fought back against him showed that this was a long way from their first such encounter. If anything they fought as if they knew each other's moves down well and could almost have choreographed their interactions!

And the dialogue-sheesh! Leona had heard better exchanges made in poorly dubbed Hong Kong chop-sockie movies, and if her newly gained mastery of the Japanese language was correct, then these two had something of a rivalry going down over Ranma's former fianc e, Akane!

"RANMA-FOR WHAT YOU DID TO AKANE, PREPARE TO DIE!"

"For the last time, P-chan, I didn't do nothing to the Tomboy!"

"You call cheating behind her back with yet another woman NOTHING?!" the other boy reacted, redoubling his so-far futile efforts at laying a fist upon his opponent.

"She ain't another girlfriend!" Ranma insisted, "She's just a friend I met today..."

"LIAR!"

"What are you getting so upset about, Ryoga?" Ranma attempted to sound more reasonable, "I thought you were seeing Akari."

"I am!" the other boy cried, "But that still won't keep me from pounding your face in!"

It began to occur to Leona that Ranma was in no immediate danger from the other boy, who-if anything-was doing more damage to the already damaged yard than he was to his intended target. Ranma dodged and avoided each punch, kick and thrust as though he had seen it coming from a couple miles away, though the force of those blows was considerable, and if even one scored...well, Leona got a hint of what that would be like when one punch went wild and Ryoga shattered a good sized boulder near to the koi pond.

It also occurred to her that she was the cause of this current altercation, and it was this realization that prompted her to cup her hands together and raise her voice in a shout, "YOU BLOCKHEAD! DON'T YOU KNOW I'M NOT INTO GUYS THESE DAYS?"

There was no immediate reaction, so Leona tried again by shouting, "I'M INTO GIRLS! AND I'M NOT DATING RANMA!"

There was a pause, then Ryoga cried, "He turns into a Girl half the time, too!" and they resumed trading punches and insults.

Leona rolled her eyes. "God, I can't believe all this macho bull," she sighed, "These guys must eat way too much red meat..." she took a deep breath and cried, "Idiot, I'm dating ERIN!"

"Eh?" both boys froze in the act of readying punches, and both turned their heads to give astonished looks in her direction.

"You want me to spell it out to you?" Leona stalked right up to the boy with the headband and glared him in the eyes before saying, "Erin and me aren't just friends, we're LOVERS! We have been for two years, almost since I became an Immortal, so STOP FIGHTING ABOUT ME AND TRY LISTENING FOR A CHANGE!"

"Uh..." Ryoga began rather hesitantly, "Who are you?"

"Baka," Ranma took advantage of the other boy's precarious stance and pushed him into the koi pond, where he vanished instantly from sight.

"Are you bullying him again, Ranma?" demanded an angry Akane as she came stalking into view, mad as a wet hen.

"Naw," Ranma replied, "I'm just cooling him off, the sore-head."

"BWEEE!" cried a plaintive voice as a non-human face poked up from the surface of the water, amid a floating yellow shirt and pair of green trousers.

"Oh, P-chan...there you are!" said Akane as her tone went instantly from enraged to cooing.

"Huh?" Leona wondered where the boy had gotten off to when she saw the look of strained disdain cross Ranma's face. He was looking at the small black pig that Akane lifted into her arms, and it did not take a rocket scientist for her to put two and two together, "You mean...he...?"

"Don't say it, Sugar," a voice murmured in her ear, "She wouldn't understand you anyway...she thinks the pig is her pet, talk about Clueless!"

"Aiyaa," Shampoo seconded Ukyo's estimation, "Akane no see with own eyes how boy change shape in water. Is much like Shampoo curse, only Akane no want see truth...is very strange girl."

"Uh..." Leona glanced over her shoulder and found nearly the entire cast was watching them from the unaffected area in the yard, "Ah...how long have you guys...?"

"Every word of it," Nabiki replied, "Don't worry, though, it can be our little secret. I'm sure there must be one or two people within a kilometer radius who didn't hear you shouting."

"Ye ought to be wary how ye blab these things out loud, Luv," Erin herself said as she slowly approached them, "Poor girl's a mite more touched than I thought. How long has the lad...?"

"Two years," Ranma said, "But she never makes the connection."

"What are you talking about?" Akane as she turned around and looked from one side to the other, continuing to stroke the pig in her arms, "What about my P-  
chan?"

"Nothing," Nabiki said, "We're just making conversation."

"Hmph," Akane stormed off towards the house, "Well if you're gonna talk in riddles around me, don't expect me to stand here and take your insults."

They all turned to watch her go, and then Leona murmured aloud, "That girl is totally deranged. You mean she doesn't get it? I thought you people were used to these curses?"

"We are," Ukyo replied, glancing at Ranma, "Or at least we're used to seeing people turn into things and back again, like Ranchan and his father."

"Akane only one who no see that stupid Pig-boy and pig are one in same," Shampoo added, "No want see, Shampoo think, treat Ryoga better than she treat Airen."

"And if she ever does figure it out," Nabiki added, "She'll kill him."

Ranma heaved a weary sigh, "It's all my fault...I kept the truth from her in the beginning...I thought I was doing Ryoga a favor..."

"Excuse me?" Leona asked, "The guy just said he wanted to kill you and you wanted to help him?"

"Hey, it ain't like he's ever come close enough to do it," Ranma reasoned, "He's just a stupid, clueless Baka and he's head over heels in love with Akane...only now he's got another girl who he's seeing on the sly. Ryoga can't deal with the fact that Akane doesn't love him the way she ought to...and believe me, I almost wish she did so she wouldn't be all jealous over me and the others," he nodded significantly towards Ukyo, Shampoo and Nabiki.

"Let me see if I understand this right, lad," Erin remarked, "The boy obviously regards ye as a rival for her affections, attacks ye with the intent O' doing murder, and he accuses ye of playing the field while cheating on her...and the lass has nay a clue as to his feelings on the matter?"

"You got it," Ranma nodded.

"Hah," Leona scoffed, "They sound like a perfect match. I say let 'em have each other."

"Now Luv," Erin chided, "Let's nay be hasty in condemning the both O' em. 'Tis obvious enough that the lad means well but has nay a clue as to what he be doing...almost like someone else I remember by the name of Hibiki," she stared crossly at Genma, who fidgeted slightly.

"There's something you have to understand about Hibiki Ryoga," Nabiki began, lifting a finger as she said, "Rule number one, no matter what happens, it is ALWAYS Ranma's fault."

"If the moon is out of alignment or it rains in the desert it is always Ranma's fault," Ukyo added with a helpful, "Sugar."

"It no matter if Ranma on other side of world," Shampoo continued for them, "It still fault of Airen."

"And in the case of anything that clearly is not the fault of Ranma," Nabiki concluded, "Refer to rule number one."

"Sheesh," Leona winced, "Is that guy clueless or what?"

"Rather like his father," Erin noted with an oblique smile towards Genma.

"I don't know what you're talking about," Genma looked away, only to react in dismay as Soun cried out in a loud and plaintive voice, "HE BROKE IT! By all the ancestors of our two houses, HE BROKE THE SEAL! We're all doomed!"

"Huh?" Nabiki turned to regard her panicked father, "What is it now, Daddy?"

"Oh my," said Nodoka, "I believe he means that boulder that always sat in the sun next to the koi pond."

Heads turned in the direction indicated, where the broken fragments of what had been a large rock were starting to smolder and wisps of smoke became like streaming tendrils of mist, congealing in the air above the garden as a pair of malevolent eyes began to glow from within the gathering gloom of early evening.

"Aiyaa..." Shampoo softly murmured.

"Oh my," agreed Kasumi.

"W-W-What is that?" asked a somewhat panicked Ukyo.

"I don't know," Ranma replied, "But it doesn't look good..."

The billowing smoke resolved itself into a towering form roughly twelve feet in height and human in its outline with ruddy-hued skin and long dark green colored hair trailing down its back.

"FREE!" the creature cried out as it spread its arms wide, "FREE AT LAST, AFTER CENTURIES OF IMPRISONMENT I CAN FINALLY HAVE MY VENGEANCE!"

"Uh oh," Nabiki murmured, "It looks like an Oni..."

"Or variation of a particular tribe perhaps," Erin conceded with a surprisingly even tone in her voice.

"You guys have seen one before?" Leona asked as she nervously backed away and drew her sword from concealment.

"Oh yes," Kasumi replied with an oddly haunted expressin.

"We're doomed!" Soun cried in a low whimper.

"It's loose..." Genma cringed, "But we sealed it twenty years ago..."

"THAT'S RIGHT," the creature regarded the two fathers, "YOU WERE THE ONES WHO REPAIRED THE SEAL THE LAST TIME I BROKE FREE, SO YOU CAN HAVE THE HONOR OF BEING THE FIRST ONES TO PERISH AT MY HANDS!"

With incredible speed for one so massive the creature turned and slashed with one of its clawed hands, only to have a fast-moving figure intercept its attack and catch that claw in his bare hands, halted it from reaching its intended targets.

"NO WAY!" Ranma grunted, "Nobody beats up on the old man but me!"

"Ranma!" Shampoo cried at the same instant as Nabiki, while Ukyo's cry was more like "Ranchan!"

"FOOL!" the creature grunted as it strained to force its way against the young Saotome, "DO YOU THINK THAT YOU CAN MATCH MY POWER WITH YOUR PUNY MIGHT?"

"Won't hurt to try!" Ranma growled as he fought against the creature.

"Lad's got spunk," Erin noted.

"He's crazy!" Leona exclaimed.

"That too," agreed her Mentor.

The demon flexed it muscles, shifted its posture and heaved, exerting it superior size, mass and strength in an attempt to prevail against the resistance provided by Ranma. The uneven match lasted only a few seconds, which was long enough for some anxious nail biting from all corners, until Ukyo broke the stalemate by providing a distraction, her spatulas scoring off the tough hide of the creature, which did no actual harm but did manage to distract the Oni.

With a cry that summoned up the power of his Chi, Ranma exerted his force and gripped the arm of the creature, twisting it sharply and causing the Oni to react in pain as it was forced down on one knee and straining to resist being pinned to the tarmac.

"Well," remarked Nabiki, "That was anticlimactic."

"She's not done yet," Cologne warned.

"What?" Leona responded.

"Aiyaa!" Shampoo exclaimed, "Ranma watch out!"

All at once the Oni was surrounded by a fiery green wrath that erupted from its skin, which grew hot as flame, searing Ranma's hands and forcing him to release it. All at once the creature reared up in its full terror, the fire bursting out like an explosion of force that drove people back as if buffeted by hurricane-force gale winds.

"Oh my!" Kasumi exclaimed as she was driven back towards the house, her voice barely a murmur over the howl created by the demon.

"This be getting' a wee intense for me liking!" Erin remarked as she stood her ground with arms raised to block the winds from her face.

"No fooling!" Leona cried, "How the hell do we fight a creature like that?"

"We persevere," said Saotome Nodoka as she appeared at their sides, her sword at the ready, "We beat her once before, we can do it again!"

"But...how did you do it, Sugar?" Ukyo asked as she stood braced with her Baker's peel against the gale-force winds, "That's what we want to know!"

"There's only one way that could prove effective," Nodoka replied, "The Ceremony that bound her before..."

Even as she spoke those words the Demoness reared back and savagely back-handed Ranma into the Koi pond, skipping him like a stone on the water even as this triggered his cursed form and sent him-now HER-flying into the far back wall.

"Ranma!" Nabiki heard herself crying at the same time as both Shampoo and Ukyo, but unlike those other two she was not presently engaged in fighting against the demon winds and was sufficiently far enough away from the Demon to slip around and approach him while the Amazon and Chef fought to remain on their feet alongside Leona.

"YOU WILL NOT TRAP ME LIKE BEFORE!" the Demoness roared, "I WILL BE FREE TO HAVE MY REVENGE!"

"Nay by a long mile!" Erin cried as she braced her sword across both hands and cried out words in Gaelic, creating a wedge of force that lanced out from her drawn blade and caused the Demon to recoil slightly.

Nabiki was never able to say what exactly were her motivations for risking her hide by going to the aid of Ranma. What she would not be able to admit to herself or to others was how her heart was in her mouth when she saw how badly battered and beaten Ranma-chan appeared, as though the young Saotome had taken one too many hits in a brief lifetime that had been far too full of such punishing and abusive treatment. As she knelt down at Ranma's side she saw at once the angry red welts on well-callused hands where the Demon had burned her and at once clenched her own hands in impotent fury. Tears welled at the corners of her eyes as Nabiki fought down a surprising surge of unexpected emotions that she previously would have denied that she even possessed, threatening to overwhelm her conscious mind with thoughts of sympathy, shame and self-loathing.

She thought back to all of the times in the past when she had witnessed Ranma suffering harsh and sometimes even cruel treatment-whether earned or unearned-  
-while Nabiki had stood by and made no comment as though totally indifferent to the suffering of others. She felt a particular revulsion at her own earlier indifference, clearly regretting now that she had never taken action to prevent this sort of outcome regarding Ranma. In the past she had behaved as if there were nothing wrong with allowing the boy-slash-girl to suffer these sorts of abuses, telling herself he was never truly hurt and that it hardly even mattered to her because he was just a guy who was engaged to marry her sister.

This was Ranma, after all...and Ranma was supposed to be the next best thing to indestructible. Punch her, kick her, drop her off the side of a building, explode one of Happosai's bombs close to her person and still Ranma would recover and come back twice as cocky as ever. Ranma had become like a pillar of indomitable strength to Nabiki's way of thinking, in total contrast to every other male figure that she could name right off the top of her head, and every other guy in Nerima paled to insignificance when paired against him...including her own father.

And was it so surprising that she should think this way about her new iinazuke? Sure he had his share of faults, but they were balanced by considerable virtues, for he was often very kind towards her and surprisingly generous at other occasions, for all that he had an ego the size of a small mountain...

Or used to have such an ego anyway. Of late that ego had been notorious for its absence, a casualty of the misconceived attempt by Ranma to pacify an increasingly violent and unstable Akane. Ranma was still a Jerk and a Baffoon at times, but he was always there to protect those who needed him and-Akane's protests to the contrary-he was not a pervert, did not deliberately hassle and pursue other women, was true to his word when he gave it and never truly behaved in a dishonorable or untrustworthy manner. He had too much pride to lower himself in such a way that he could recognize in himself the behavior that was more typical of his father. Ranma was no angel, but he was a long cry from the devil that he was often called by Kuno Tatewaki.

And Ranma was invincible...everyone who went up against him learned that to their ruin. Kirin, Saffron, Pantyhose Taro...all had tried and failed to crush the life out of the valiant Saotome, and if Ranma were in his best fighting trim he could have taken that demon on with a Hiryu Shoten Ha or Moko Takabishi Chi-  
blast. Nabiki had seen the boy-slash-girl do miraculous things, come up with winning strategies on the spur of the moment, turn defeat into victory time and again no matter what odds were stacked against him.

And yet here was that selfsame Saotome Ranma laying beneath a broken wall that still bore the impact of her body, a body that was not itself in pristine shape, sporting many scars and bruises...far too many as Nabiki examined them from close at hand, remembering how at least some of those injuries had been taken...

And why...particularly in the case of wounds that had been suffered as a direct result of her own actions... and as Nabiki came to this particular realization she found that she was no longer very fond of herself as a person...

Meanwhile Erin was stretching herself to her limits in an effort to hold the Demoness at bay, only to find herself on the defensive. As powerful as the Immortal was, the resources of the creature against whom she was locked in combat were nearly inexhaustible, fueled by a rage that would not be bound again by anyone, mortal or Immortal.

"This doesn't look good!" Leona shouted above the tumult of battle, "Erin's going all out but that Demon just keeps on fighting!"

"Maybe if we distract her we can get her to let up a little!" Ukyo called out.

"Is worth trying!" Shampoo agreed, "We go together?"

"You bet," Ukyo flashed her nominal rival a smile that was more comradely, almost friendly, "On the count of three?"

"Three!" Shampoo agreed, and at once they both vaulted forward, Bakers Peel and Bonbori maces lashing out to strike at the Demon's unprotected flank. At the last moment the Demon turned to see their approach but did not have time enough to raise its defenses and so suffered a double-impact of metal on the it's reddened body. Unfortunately, though the demon howled in rage and displeasure, it was only momentarily inconvenienced and came back with a vengeance, flinging her attackers to one side even as she poured on the energy and increased the power of her offensive, sending Erin to her knees as the force beat down at her with relentless fury.

Of course even Demons do get careless, and in the time it took to do all this Leona sensed an opening and circled around behind the monster. At the same time that Shampoo and Ukyo were sent sailing she dove in from the rear and aimed her sword at the unprotected rear of the monster, the one place no one else was looking.

To all appearance Leona seemed to manifest from out of no where as she thrust home at the Demon's tailbone. Said Demoness screwed up her eyes and then gave out such a yell as to frighten the hordes of all the ninety-nine hells into finding protective cover...

"Oh my," Cologne's voice intruded into Nabiki's own private hell, "I rather imagine she felt that one where it counts. Are you gong to sit there and mope like a lovesick girl all day or are you going to act like the Nabiki I know and have observed at length? The Nabiki who uses her intellect to triumph where others who use brawn do not?"

"Wh-what do you mean?" Nabiki asked, coming back to herself after having once again relived the sight of Akane beating Ranma senseless over the prank that she had played for amusement.

"Think, Child," Cologne urged, "Your strength has always been in your brain more than your heart...now you must use both organs if we are to contain the creature and seal it away for another generation."

"You mean...the spell that was used to seal the pact between the houses?" Nabiki ventured.

"You have only minutes to act before we are overwhelmed by the Demon," Cologne replied, "Even I may not prevail against a creature of this scope and power. The Houses must be united, and as your sister failed to qualify, you must be the one to fill her place. But first you must decide...do you wish to take this man-child as your husband?"

"My...my...what?" Nabiki blinked, the sudden reality of her situation crashing home on her as she saw plainly the logic of what Cologne was asking, though the word "husband" nearly caused her brain to lock up in a paralytic coma.

"Choose, girl," Cologne urged, "Ukyo and Shampoo would never hesitate to say the words, but neither of them is a Tendo. Only you can act if the Pact is to be recognized by the powers."

"But...the stone is broken," Nabiki faltered.

"What was broken can be made whole," Cologne replied, "That is the reason your father and Genma sacrificed so much and were willing to go to any lengths to insure this union, but only you can decide if their actions were worth all of the trouble."

"Trouble?" Nabiki found it impossible to understand how it had all come down upon her shoulders, the fate of her entire family versus the choice to be made of sealing her fate to that of Ranma.

One glance over her shoulder, however, and she saw that the alternative was not to be contemplated.

"YOU DARE DO THAT TO ME, YOU-YOU PITIFUL INSECT?" the Demon reared up before Leona, who held her ground with her sword at the ready.

"Well...hey," Leona tried to sound off-handed about her own actions, "You gotta admit it was worth a shot to the Arse," her tone unconsciously mimicking that of her mentor.

In response to this comment the Demon lashed out, its hand striking with the force of a cobra to smash the insolent human before her, and Leona did not even have a seconds chance to avoid this.

"LAUGH THAT OFF, YOU CRETIN!" the Demoness snorted as it removed its hand from the crater that now contained a semi-flattened Leona.

"Owie..." Leona replied, and blessedly passed into unconsciousness so that her body could begin the critical process of repairing itself to normal.

"LEONA!" Erin cried, rallying from her own near-defeat with renewed energy and enthusiasm.

Meanwhile Ukyo and Shampoo were peeling themselves up off of the roof of the Tendo house, the former saying to the latter, "I think we're gonna need a better angle of attack if we're gonna nail this sucker..."

"That or bigger weapons," the Amazon agreed, "Shampoo no like say this, but could use Akane hammer attack to help us fight Demon."

"Fat chance of that," Ukyo sat up and glanced around, "Hey...where is Akane during all of this...and Ryoga for that matter?"

"Pig boy stay close to Akane," Shampoo looked around, "But where is Pig boy?"

"There!" Ukyo shouted, then blinked her eyes and said, "What the heck is she doing?"

Soun was wondering the same thing as he saw his youngest daughter huddled up against the wall of the dojo clutching at herself with a face that was as white as a sheet, staring not at the Demon but out towards nothing. At her side small black pig made inquiring noises as if seeking to understand the cause of her condition.

"Akane!" Soun launched himself from his place of concealment, his parental instincts overcoming his natural desire for self-preservation.

"Daddy!" Nabiki at once saw the danger to both her sister and her father, standing exposed as they were within a short distance of the fighting, and the realization that only a few seconds would elapse before the giant red-skinned monster took notice of this made her turn to Cologne and say, "What do I have to do? Ranma's not even the right sex...I can't exactly marry him like he is."

"You could if you were an Amazon," Cologne smiled shrewdly, leaving Nabiki slightly bewildered as the ancient Matriarch turned her gaze to the side and said, "Ah yes...good thinking, child...as timely as always."

"Kasumi?" Nabiki looked up to see her sister pouring a kettle of just-heated water onto Ranma.

"We have to hurry, Nabiki," Kasumi informed her younger sister, "Father and Akane won't last long if that awful person goes after them."

Unfortunately for their sister and father, his sudden movement coming to Akane's defense caught the attention of the Demon, who was presently engaged in another battle of wills against Erin, but not so engaged that it could miss the sight of a hated foeman.

"THERE HE IS, THE COWARD!" the Demoness roared, turning back to Erin, "WHEN I FINISH WITH YOU, I WILL AVENGE MYSELF ON HIM AND ALL HIS CHILDREN!"

"In a Pig's eye ye will!" Erin shot back, "I've been a Priestess and a Fighter near all me life an' I won't be taken in by the likes of ye!"

"WRONG!" the Demoness roared, "THIS FIGHT ENDS NOW!"

The Demon raised both hands and brought them down again, then abruptly pushed them forward, and suddenly a blast of enormous power leaped skyward and arced downward again, then abruptly shot forward in perfect mimicry of the Demon's motion. The force of the blast struck Erin below the level of where she had her sword raised en guard and swept the Immortal off her feet, sending her flying backward and colliding another wall with bone-shattering impact.

"Oboy," Ukyo declared, "There goes our last line of defense."

"Is still us," Shampoo reasoned.

"Didn't do us much good the last time," Ukyo hefted her trademark weapon, "But I'm game for it if you are."

"Shampoo try," the Amazon nodded as she recovered her Bonbori maces, "But need better timing, and maybe this time we no survive."

"If we don't then Mister Tendo and Akane are paste," Ukyo declared grimly, then something else attracted her attention, "Hey...what's Nabiki doing with Ranchan?"

"Look like they try wake up Ranma," Shampoo said, "But what Great-Grandmother doing with them? She best fighter, she could help with Demon."

"Ranma, wake up!" Nabiki patted the boy's cheeks, hoping against hope that the legendary Saotome vitality would come to the fore, coupled with the partial healing that always occurred every time Ranma switched genders, "We need you to wake up now! Please!"

The word "Please" seemed to get a reaction out of Ranma, as if it were a word he did not normally associate with Nabiki, "Wh-whuzzat...? Izit time t'go to school already...?"

"No Dummy!" Nabiki cast a hasty glance back towards the Demon, who was even then advancing on her father, which added fuel to her urgency as she cried, "Ranma, we need you! I need you! Come back to me, dammit! This is no time for you to be laying down and taking a nap, Saotome!"

"You...need me?" Ranma was still not coherent, and then Nabiki saw his eyes drift to the side as he murmured, "Akane?"

Nabiki was ready to curse the boy out, her long pent-up frustration coming to the fore as she fumed impotently in despair, knowing that Ranma was still hopelessly in love with her sister and that getting him to marry her was an even more hopeless quest than her applying for the Nobel Peace Prize.

But Cologne was not to be so easily daunted and before Ranma was fully gathered to his wits she said, "The girl will die and all her family with her...yours as well unless you do exactly as I tell you, Saotome Ranma."

That got Ranma's attention...almost the first time in memory that the wizened old lady had not called him "Son-in-law." The battle-hardened instincts that had served Ranma so well in many a dangerous encounter came to the fore as he correctly read the urgency in Cologne's words and took them seriously, to which he automatically replied, "What do I have to do, Ghoul?"

"First stand up and follow me," Cologne paused as she saw Nabiki offering Ranma a hand and witnessed the surprise in the boy's expression, as if the thought that she would do something for nothing was as unthinkable as his father giving up drinking and lying.

"Don't worry," Nabiki said by way of easing his mind on that subject, "You can owe it to me for later."

That did the trick of reassuring him, and Ranma knew he had to do something so he rallied his flagging strength and allowed himself to be led by Cologne and Nabiki back towards the koi pond.

"Looks like they're going to try something," Ukyo said, "And we'd better do something quick or it won't make any difference."

"We buy time for Ranma," Shampoo agreed, and together they vaulted from the roof with weapons raised and ready for employment.

"AT LAST YOU DIE, TENDO!" the Demoness clearly savored the moment, which was why she had not acted precipitously to destroy one half of the hated equation.

Soun was not by nature a brave man, life under the Master had eroded much of the confidence of his youth and left in its place a fervent desire to preserve his own life at the cost of dignity, pride and even honor. When it came to family, however, he could become a raging lion, so even though he stood not a snowball's chance against the Monster, still he was determined to guard Akane with his life from the certain destruction that would be visited upon her if he faltered.

"Do your worst!" he heard someone say who sounded suspiciously a lot like himself, though he could have sworn at any other time that they were the words of a stranger.

"DON'T WORRY!" the Demoness cried, "I WILL!"

The Monster reared back with a fist and prepared to smash Tendo Soun into grease spot, but before the blow could land two other blows rang off against its backside, hammer-blows from twin maces and a splitting blow delivered with the sharp edge of a Baker's Peel. Both struck home with great force and precision, and against any other target they would have most likely been telling.

The Demon shrugged them off with surprisingly little effort, but the activity did have the desirable effect of bringing Akane out of her momentary stupor. Her eyes opened wide as she saw her father standing with his back turned towards her and a monster looming over him...a monster that she had often seen in her darkest nightmares.

"Dad?" Akane asked.

"Bwee?" inquired the Pig beside her.

"Don't be afraid, Akane," her father said while continuing to confront the Demon, "Daddy will protect you...there is nothing to be afraid of."

The pig had its doubts about that, but before he could make another "Bwee" he was struck by hot water poured from the remainder of Kasumi's upheld teakettle.

"Oh my," Kasumi blinked as she had not quite thought ahead to the condition that Ryoga would be in when he reverted to his human type, but fortunately she had thought to bring a spare set of his shirt and trousers (which were surprisingly easy to find in their yard, and being a diligent housekeeper she naturally had collected and cleaned them before returning them whenever occasions such as this arose) so she hastily set them next to the boy and hoped that he would take the hint before flashing himself before Akane.

"YOU TWO...AGAIN?" the Demoness snarled as it turned to confront both Chef and Amazon, "TOO BAD FOR YOU, I MIGHT HAVE LET YOU LIVE, NOW YOU CAN SUFFER THE SAME FATE AS THESE OTHERS!"

"This it," Shampoo said as she braced herself for the Demon's retaliation.

"Been nice knowing you, Sugar," Ukyo murmured back as they both stood at the ready.

The Demoness's hands began to glow and then be surrounded by fire, and she drew one hand back before launching a blast of flame that incinerated the place where the two young girls had been standing. Had they remained standing there it was with little doubt that they would have been deep-fried to mere cinders, but at the last second a large, stocky form came barreling down at them and scooped both girls out of harms way, only to receive a glancing brush with the flames as they scored against their rescuer's backside.

Ukyo and Shampoo were both amazed to be alive and stunned upon discovering the identity of their rescuer, but Saotome Genma had more urgent things on his mind than meeting their inquiring faces as his Gi was aflame, his backside badly burned and blistered, and with only one logical means by which he could find relief from his problems.

Without an instant of hesitation he doused himself in the Koi pond, then emerged a moment later in Panda form, badly singled and blistered but otherwise remarkably quite healthy.

And in the Panda's paw was an upheld sign that read, "Well, what are you two waiting for? Help the Boy and Nabiki!"

"SO..." the Demoness taunted, "THE OTHER COWARD DARES TO SHOW HIS FACE AGAIN! I THINK I'LL SKIN YOU ALIVE AND WEAR YOU AS A FUR COAT, YOU COUSIN TO A RACCOON!"

The Panda calmly turned the sign around and on it were the words, "Even I have my limits."

And promptly passed out, falling over backwards.

"Dearest!" Nodoka cried as she hurried over to the unconscious form of her species-altered husband.

The Demoness took a step forward with clear intent on wrecking its vengeance upon the now-helpless Genma when Soun rallied himself and launched his own fearsome "Demon Head" attack, which was normally so effective in giving a momentary check to the ego of an assailant.

This time, however, the effect was somewhat different than imagined as the Demoness paused to study the projection, then smiled and said, "HEY...YOU'RE KIND OF CUTE."

"Urk?" Soun reacted, the Demon face melting away as he lost his concentration.

"Shampoo Honey?" Ukyo asked.

"What, Spatula Girl?" the Amazon responded.

"That didn't really just happen...did it?"

"Not know what you mean," Shampoo replied, "It optical illusion...no can be we get rescued by silly Panda."

"That's what I figured," Ukyo silently nodded.

"What are you two girls gaggling on about?" Cologne chided the both of them as they turned to see the old woman perched on a stone before Ranma and Nabiki, "Come over here and take your places in the ring. We are about to perform the ceremony and we can hardly do it effectively without your participation."

"Our..." Ukyo blinked her eyes.

"Partici-what?" Shampoo blinked in chorus.

Meanwhile Erin was shrugging off the massive damage that she had taken and pulled herself loose from the wreckage of the wall in which she had been half-  
buried. She staggered forward, barely retaining possession of her sword as she found herself at the far fringes of the yard and not in the best of fighting condition. The Demon was looming over Soun and Akane once again, having dispensed with needless distractions and there was no way for Erin to reach them in time. Her body was recovering its strength by the second, but she would need another full minute before she would be at her maximum and ready to dish out payback to the Demon.

Fortunately someone else was there to run much-needed interference. The Demon found its way suddenly blocked by a youthful boy in whom she sensed the blood of an Oni, bare-chested wearing only a hastily tied-on pair of olive green trousers. Surprisingly the boy was snarling at her and baring his fangs like a wild boar readying to charge an errant hunter.

"YOU..." the giant Oni stated, "YOU ARE ONE OF US...YET YOU SIDE WITH THESE PATHETIC HUMANS?"

"I'm nothing like you!" the boy snarled, "Stay away from Akane and Mister Tendo...I won't let you hurt them!"

"R-Ryoga?" Akane murmured in surprise, wondering why it was this boy and not Ranma who had come to her defense here.

"Be careful, Son," Soun cautioned, "The creature is more dangerous than you know."

"I know, Sir," Ryoga replied resolutely, "But I don't care. I won't let you hurt the one I love or any of her family, so leave now or else, do you get me?"

"What?" Akane blinked her eyes, convinced that she had not heard the lost boy correctly.

"INSOLENT WHELP!" the Demoness cried, "TO LET YOUR LUST FOR A MORTAL BLIND YOU TO THE DESTINY OF THE ONI? THE HUMAN HALF OF YOUR BLOOD HAS POLUTED YOUR THINKING...WELL, I WILL SHOW YOU THE TRUE PATH FOR OUR KIND WHEN DISPENSING WITH THESE PATHETIC WEAKLINGS!"

The Oni reared back and came crashing down with both fists, but Ryoga intercepted them gripped those fists with his own hands, bringing the monster to a halt in spite of the tremendous force that caused the ground beneath his feet to buckle.

"Oh..." Leona groaned as she chose that moment to recover consciousness, "Anybody got the number of that tank that just ran me over...?"

It occurred to her that a very pretty fireworks display was taking place before her eyes, and then it dawned on her that July was not for another two months and that this strange light-show had the look more of a Hollywood special effect than a typical celebration.

"Uh oh," she came alert to the fact that she was laying half-buried in a pit, and for a moment she wondered if she were suffering a relapse of that time that some fool tried to bury her by mistake a few weeks back in Lisbon. But no she wasn't that deeply buried this time, so she forced herself to sit upright, aware that her body was not yet finished fully healing, and raised her head above ground level...just in time to see the Oni bearing down upon a shirtless Ryoga, who was straining with all his might to hold the Oni at bay. It was plain enough that the Monster would overwhelm him in a few more heartbeats, but the Lost Boy refused to give up ground, holding on for dear life against a creature whose resources seemed to dwarf his own by a long measure.

But that wasn't the only interesting thing to catch her notice...off to one side by the koi pond she saw Ranma, Ukyo, Shampoo and Nabiki standing around while Cologne waved her staff and said words that were drowned out over the roar of battle. Erin was staggering to their side, which meant that this was the place to be if you wanted to make a difference, and being the sort of girl who never liked being left behind, Leona resolved to pry herself loose from her hole and crawl over in that direction...just as soon as her joints could be convinced that it was worth the effort!

"Ryoga?" Akane forced herself to stand, forgetting all about the painful memories and emotions that had been rendering her impotent, seeing only her dearest friend being steadily humbled by a creature from her nightmares. Ryoga's profession of love for her had not as yet fully registered, what she did know was that he needed her aid, and so she squared her shoulder, reminded that she was "A Martial-Artist Too," and balled her fists as though clutching the imaginary handle of a hammer. As Ryoga found himself being forced onto his other knee, Akane advanced forward and declared, "Hold on, Ryoga, I'm coming to help!"

But as she took a resolute step forward something shot past her and latched itself onto the broad chest of the Demoness, declaring with a loud, "SWEEETOOOO!" his intention to make his own mark in the deadly encounter.

"WHAT?" the Demon staggered backward, letting go of Ryoga, "YOU? LET GO OF ME, YOU LITTLE PERVERT! HAVEN'T YOU GOT ANYTHING BETTER TO DO BESIDES HARASS ME AND CHASE OTHER WOMEN?"

"Gee, where have I heard that before?" Ranma wondered, but by the slightly slurred sound of his voice it was plain that he was only semi-lucid.

"Looks like the old guy picked a great time to recover," Ukyo said before turning to Shampoo and saying, "Nervous, Sugar?"

"No can believe we doing this," Shampoo replied, "Or that great grandmother tell Shampoo do this."

"The matter cannot be put off forever, child," Cologne said gravely, having finished invoking the first part of her spell, "The time is right...state clearly before the powers your intent to join in and form this circle of union from which a new pact shall be forged."

"Pact?" Ranma blinked his eyes, "What pact?"

"Why Son-in-Law," Cologne smiled shrewdly, "You are about to be wed to these three stunning beauties."

"Wed?" Ranma blinked, "Y-You mean...married? GAK!"

Ranma turned around and probably would have bolted but for the very solid mass he ran into, who caught him firmly by the shoulders as he bounced off of her chest and turned him around to face forward, "Why Laddie...ye d'nna want t'be leaving just now, nae if it means disappointing these lovely lasses who care so much about ye."

"B-But-but-!" Ranma stammered.

"Just do it, you Jerk!" Leona cried as she staggered up to join them, "There isn't time enough to get cold feet now, not if you want to beat that monster!"

"Is right," Shampoo affirmed, "Is no time to be running, Ranma...is time to be taking stand."

"Yeah, Ranchan," Ukyo agreed, "It's not like we've got a lot of options here, but don't you want to marry us? Don't you even care about us...a little?"

"I...sure-but..." Ranma glanced around, doing a passable imitation of his father in a blind panic.

Leona rolled her eyes and wondered what the boy's problem was, or if he was suffering brain damage from all the hits to the head that he obviously had suffered. Here he was with three eager and willing girls who were nothing short of drop-dead gorgeous and the guy was having second thoughts at the altar? Though she hated to have to do this, she decided a well-placed taunt might spur him forward...and maybe relieve her own question on the subject, so with all the schoolgirl bravado that she could muster she said, "What's the matter...are you gay or something?"

"WHAT?" Ranma flashed in outrage, "I AM NOT!"

"Not even when you turn into a girl?" Leona quipped in her best suggestive manner.

"Huh?" Ranma blinked, "I..."

Desperate times called for desperate measures as Nabiki well knew, so she drew upon her rather extensive knowledge of Ranma's psyche and said, "Aw, he's probably too Chicken or doesn't think he's man enough to handle us, Girls. He'd rather run away and bail out on his promises, just like his father."

"I DO NOT!" Ranma's declaration was surprisingly forceful as the barb stung his ego and briefly called back into life the formerly cocky and self-assured Saotome Ranma.

"Sure you do," Nabiki continued to taunt, "You'd rather Shampoo return to her village in humiliation and disgrace, that you continue to abandon Ukyo in spite of everything she went through on your behalf, and you dishonor your commitment to me and the promise to marry a Tendo...am I wrong?" she adopted her most ingratiating and patronizing of smiles, knowing it would irritate the Aquatransexual silly and cause him to engage his mouth before his brain had time to screen its defenses.

"Never!" Ranma declared, "I'm nothing like my father! I don't break my promises like he does..."

"Then you agree to marry these girls and forge a sacred circle together?" Erin asked with a sly and suggestive leer.

"YES!" Ranma declared, forcefully and in the affirmative, and only a few seconds passed before he blinked his eyes and said, "I...what? Wait a minute...!"

"Kuonji Ukyo," Cologne spoke gravely, "Do you take this Man to be your husband and these others to be your lawful sisters in marriage?"

"You know I do, Old Woman," Ukyo nodded, sparing a look towards Shampoo that was actually friendly.

"Shampoo of the Nyanchiczu," Cologne resumed, "Do you accept Ranma as your lawful husband and take these others to be your fellow wives and sisters in the unbreakable bond of a marriage union?"

"Shampoo do," the Amazon nodded, meeting Ukyo's stare and smiling as if accepting a challenge.

"Tendo Nabiki," Cologne turned at last her way and said, "You know what is at stake here, Child...do you accept Ranma as your husband in the eyes of all the Gods, and these others to be your lawful sisters in a sacred union where you all will share a place as wives and lovers?"

"I do," Nabiki replied, surprised at how easily the words flowed from her lips after all the wrangling and angst that had preceded this moment.

Cologne steeled herself as she turned finally back towards Ranma and said, "Last chance to think about this Boy...do you accept these women as your lovely brides and pledge yourself to honoring them in all the ways that matter to a marriage?"

"I...?" Ranma looked as if he were experiencing a severe case of stage fright.

"Just say you do, Dummy!" Leona barked, losing her patience as she turned a supremely worried glance back towards the Oni, who had finally succeeded in dislodging the perverted Happosai from his death-grip on her chest.

"FINALLY!" the Oni declared, "THAT WRETCH NEVER CHANGES WITH THE CENTURIES! BUT NO MATTER...AFTER THIS DAY HE WILL CEASE TO BE AN ANNOYANCE!"

"You wanna bet?" Akane declared as she stood resolutely facing the Demon.

"A-Akane?" Ryoga gasped as he clutched his blistered hands, down on both knees and looking like he was momentarily out of the fighting.

"Akane...!" Soun sought to dissuade his youngest daughter but found her non-  
responsive to his entreaties.

"You've attacked my home, you've threatened my family, you've hurt my friends," Akane balled her fists as she felt the rage building up within her, "I can never forgive you for that, you...you PERVERT!"

"THAT'S PERVECT TO YOU!" the Oni countered and prepared to launch another devastating attack, but Akane struck first, throwing all of her range and frustration into the blow, which was backed up by a good old fashioned healthy dose of raw human emotion.

Though Akane was far less trained in the arts than Ranma and the others, she had always been able to manifest a very intense and highly effective battle aura, one that drew as an archetype a kind of "Virtual" hammer that she had many times used against Ranma. Although she was unfamiliar with the concept of what a "Stand" was, her attack was primal and as intensely focused as any normal Chi attack, and where it struck the Demoness it bypassed normal defenses to impact solidly on the creature's solar plexus, which was a high as Akane could reach with creature bending to strike her.

The effect caused the Oni to stagger backwards several large paces, clutching at its gut as the wind was literally knocked out of its sails and for a few brief seconds it was totally vulnerable, its defenses effectively lowered.

And in that moment Ranma raised his eyes, stared in disbelief at a smiling Nabiki and found the words forming on his lips like a question as he asked, "I do...?"

And somewhere far above it all, looking down from a lofty perch, a being of manifest potency and august majesty slapped his metaphysical knee and cried, "CLOSE ENOUGH!" and put the necessary forces into motion to close the deal and give it his divine stamp of approval.

"W-WHAT?" the Demoness became suddenly aware of a shifting of forces all around her and stared wildly about herself, then to the side where it saw Ranma and the others gathered in a circle, to which the creature cried out, "NOOOO!" and attempted to lunge in their direction.

Soun stared in amazement as a virtual whirlwind formed about the creature, its forward lunge proving disastrous to its intentions as this merely served to hasten the process whereby it was absorbed into the ground at the exact same spot by the Koi bond where it had been sealed in previous generations. With a final cry of darkest frustration the creature vanished from sight as the fragments of stone reformed themselves and a moment later the seal was replaced and the rock once more appeared pristine as though it had never been broken in the first place.

Ranma felt the world spinning out of control all around him, a feeling that was not altogether unfamiliar to his experience, though oddly enough it was happening while his eyes were locked with those of Nabiki. For some reason the middle Tendo sister was smiling, and that smile was more radiant than a thousand rainbows that he had witnessed, and he was left to wonder why she had never smiled like that at him before. It was only then that he knew that he wanted her to smile at him, and that smiling with such generosity in her eyes was far more becoming on her than her more-or-less greedy or sardonic glances.

And then he became aware that his arms were suddenly attached to another pair of females, and he knew without glancing that Ukyo was hugging him from one side with Shampoo holding onto his other and leaning in on him like a virtual "Ranma Sandwich." Oddly enough he didn't feel his usual discomfort or nervous dread at such a situation and he was left to wonder what had changed...and why this felt so RIGHT all of a sudden?

"Do you see that, Dear?" his mother's voice suddenly broke into the ensuing silence, "Our son is finally married! Oh Ranma, you're so manly!"

Though he could not see it, Ranma could sense his father holding up a sign, and it would not have surprised him at all to read the words, "ABOUT TIME!" in badly scrawled Kanji.

"No argument there, Sugar," Ukyo affirmed.

"Is very manly man, our Airen," Shampoo cooed in contented agreement.

"Man enough for all three of us, Saotome?" Nabiki leered, unable to hold herself back any longer as she joined the other girls, sliding into the space comfortably afforded between them, which brought her face close enough to Ranma that their noses were almost touching.

"All...three of you?" Ranma swallowed, but again he could not look away, those brown eyes staring ardently into his own blue eyes were too powerfully magnetic, and Ranma wondered where he had ever before seen a face so beautiful or eyes so attractive.

"Sealed and Witnessed by meself and Leona," Erin affirmed, "It may nae be official in some circles, but for us 'tis a done deal."

"You said it," Leona sighed, relieved that it was finally over.

"Tendo-san," Nodoka called out, "Come and join us...this is a moment you ought to treasure for a lifetime!"

"OUR HOUSES ARE UNITED AT LAST!" Genma declared through use of an upraised sign, signifying with the other paw the three girls clutching at a boy who seemed to be the center of all their worldly attention.

"What?" Akane blinked her eyes then said, "Ranma...what are you doing?"

"Urk!" that voice yanked Ranma out of whatever ensorcelment had momentarily gripped him, but before he could begin to think of pacifying his former fiancee he came to another realization and asked, "What happened to the Monster?"

"Monster?" Erin smiled, "What monster?"

"Don't worry about her," Akane flexed a fist, "I dealt with that loser...but...Nabiki, what are you doing? And why are you with Ukyo and Shampoo?"

"Swift up on the uptake isn't she?" Leona grumbled sourly, only to see her Mentor make a dissuading hand gesture.

"Akane?" Ranma swallowed, "I...think I can explain this...I hope...if somebody could just explain this to me?"

"I'll take it from here, Ranma-baby," Nabiki patted him on the chest, "You can owe me for it later."

"Uh...okay," Ranma was not sure just why, but the way his new wife had said this was making him feel that his payment would be in something else besides money.

"Akane," Nabiki began, "You haven't been well...and while I never meant to hurt you, Ranma and me..."

"Forget about it," Akane shrugged indifferently, "You can have him."

"NANI?" came the immediate reply from all and sundry...

Continued.

Comments/Criticisms/Celtic Highlander: shadowmane

Sorry about the long delay on this chapter, I was trying to work myself up to handle the fight scenes in just the right manner. Now that part seven is at long last done you can see that at least one more chapter is necessary to close off the unresolved plot twists. So...what does Akane's statement mean, and has she really given up on Ranma? Tune in next time and learn the secret behind her unexpected turn-about behavior with, "All's Fell that Ends with a Bad Smell," or "Just because you're near me...I conk you!" Be there!

X

If you wish to check out my other works, Please check out my Fanfiction webpage at: . or it's mirror site at: . All related chapters of this series can be found there along with my other works. 


	8. Chapter 8

IMNerima8

Ill Met in Nerima

By Jim Robert Bader

(Inspired by the works of Rumiko Takahashi and the creators of the Highlander Series,  
with special thanks to the rock groups Everclear,  
Vertical Horizon, Matchbox Twenty, Bon Jovi and Red Hot Chili Peppers)

{Author's Note: Although the traditional time period in which Ranma 1/2 is set is around 1992, and this takes place two years into the series, I decided on using music that was not around in the 1990s as the five ballads recorded here struck me as useful in describing certain moods within this chapter, and apologies if I have garbled any of the words in passing...}

Chapter Eight.

Akane returned home late that night, having satisfied herself in her meeting with Akari over the subject of Ryoga, a boy of their mutual acquaintance. She was still thinking over the significant events of the day, a day that had seen her whole world turn topsy turvy, when the stable foundations under which she had been building her life had come crashing down, and all she had been able to do about it was stand on the sidelines and watch her fianc e be stolen away from her by her sister.

In a way she knew that she should have been a lot more upset about that, but given recent history, and the stunning revelation that Nabiki actually WANTED to marry Ranma, there had been little point in contesting the issue. Nabiki had agreed to share Ranma with Ukyo and Shampoo, but Akane had been left out in the cold on that particular conjugal bargain, and-never being one to contest the odds when they were stacked heavily against her-she had opted instead to surrender the field, to save what face she had left and cut her losses, just the sort of thing for which Nabiki had used to be famous. An irony that, but one in which Akane could find little satisfaction.

No matter how hard Akane looked at the issue, though, she could not help but see things from the vantage of her older sister. Granted that Akane had not been acting like herself of late (or at least like that side of herself that Akane would have preferred to recognize), but to be passed over in such a callous and cheapening manner was...degrading. True she had not been a very nice person to be around for the past several months, but to think she might have been accorded a little more respect than that, even if there was a crisis that demanded prompt and expedient action...

She had needed some time to be with herself, to make sense of it all, and using the excuse of going with Ryoga to find Akari had been a convenient outlet. In truth she needed to settle things on that end, and Ryoga deserved at least a little of her time, if only to explain himself and his clandestine activities in the almost two years that she had known him. It was while she was thinking these thoughts and entering past the gates leading into her yard that she began to hear the first strains of music. A guitar was playing somewhere close nearby, and a voice trilling in English, very melodious and talented with good control over both scale and timbre...

["Psychic spies from China try to steal your mind's elation And little girls from Sweden dream of silver screen flirtations,  
And if you want these kinds of dreams, it's Californication...

Akane blinked as she realized that those sounds were coming from the dojo, and since the house itself did not seem particularly well lit (implying that everyone was in bed, including Aunt Nodoka and Kasumi), she decided to investigate, circumventing the house (and catching sight of her father and "Uncle Saotome" sacked out on the porch, drunk from too much sake) and going straight to the dojo...

["It's the edge of the world in all the Western Civilization The sun may set in the east but at least it's settled in a final location,  
It's understood that Hollywood sells Californication...

Californication? Akane wondered if her usually good grasp of the English language was failing her on this occasion. It sounded like someone's play on words, combining the name California with the word Fornication, but what would be the point of that? It was an obvious example of American popular music, but as Akane drew closer and listened she began to pick up more of the gist of what the singer was conveying.

["Hey you searching there while you will break the spell of aging,  
To level your skin is this got ya in, there is that while you're waiting,  
First born in the cold...hot course of Porn...  
Dream of Californication...dream of Californication...

["Marry the girl, getting ferried through the wild, dream of very young constellations,  
A teenaged bride with a baby inside getting high on information Buy me a star on the boulevard, it's Californication...

["Space may be the final frontier but it's made in a Hollywood basement,  
And Cold Bank, can you hear the spheres singing songs from station to station,  
And alder on, not far away, it's Californication...

["Born and raised, I love the praise, control of population,  
Well, everybody's been there and I don't need no vacation,  
First born in the cold...hot course of Porn...  
Dream of Californication...dream of Californication...dream of Californication...

Akane had attempted to approach quietly, having by now recognized the singer as the dark haired girl named Leona, and as she peered through the relative gloom of a moonless evening she could see the American-born girl strumming an eight-  
string guitar as she sang at a level just soft enough not to wake anyone in the house...

["Destruction leads to a very rough road but it also breeds creation,  
And earthquakes are to a girl's guitar just another very good vibration,  
And tidal waves couldn't save the world from Californication...

["Hey you searching there while you will break the spell of aging,  
Second to the rest, there is no test, but this is what you're craving...  
First born in the cold...hot course of Porn...  
Dream of Californication...dream of Californication...dream of Californication..."1]

"Uh...hi?" Akane tentatively said to announce her presence.

Leona reacted to the voice by reaching for the sword that she had left close at hand, and Akane felt a stab of guilt at having provoked such a defensive reaction in the young Immortal. Leona stayed her hand when she made out the other dark-haired figure and very cautiously said, "Tendo-san?"

"Just Akane," she replied, "Ah...you won't need that. I'm not planning to attack you or anything."

"You sure?" Leona asked, "I mean...no hard feelings and all of that...?"

"None whatsoever," Akane replied, "Ah...mind if I sit down? I've done a lot of walking today and I'd...kind of like to rest my legs."

"Oh...sure," Leona waved to the open door of the dojo, "It's your place and all that. I'm just a temporary house guest."

"More temporary than our last pair of houseguests," Akane grumbled as she sat down on the wooden floor facing opposite to Leona, who was herself resting her back to the doorframe, "Look, I want to apologize for what happened earlier. Me hitting you, that is...I was kind of out of control back there, and it wasn't called for. I'm...sorry..."

"Well..." Leona sighed, "It's nice to hear you say that, but don't worry about it. You were kinda possessed back there, and I'd chalk up to that Demon messing with your head."

"That's a pretty weak excuse, though," Akane sighed, "I've got a lot to answer for, and I can't pass it all off onto that...Oni. I was out of control and I messed up my whole life, and I had no business taking it out on you. I've...always had problems with my temper...and I guess it sometimes does make me pretty hard to live with..."

"I'll take your word on that," Leona said as she fingered her guitar, "Hope I wasn't disturbing you just now. It's just that...playing the guitar for me is a way to relax, and after Erin had mine sent from the hotel where we last stopped for the night by special express carrier..."

"Beats punching out a bag, I guess," Akane sniffed, "But really, I didn't mind listening to you play at all. You're very good, and you have a pretty nice voice."

"Ah...thanks," Leona replied, "It's something that just kinda came to me. I heard it on the radio once and I wanted to practice."

"Huh?" Akane blinked, "You mean...you heard that song just one time...and you remember it that good?"

"Sure," Leona replied, "Back home in Kansas City, before I...became an Immortal, I used to play with an all-girl band I set up at my High School. I was pretty good back then if I do say so myself, but ever since I quickened...well...I've never had any trouble remembering any song that I've ever heard played. That's one of the advantages we've got, perfect memory and total recall...and we never get senile or develop Alzheimer's or anything like that."

"Sounds like a pretty useful talent," Akane glanced down, "Ranma also has that ability. He can remember any martial arts move he sees and perform it flawlessly without practice. He's lucky in that regard...I could use a perfect memory of my own sometimes. Sometimes I wonder, though...is he like you? Ah...I mean...?"

"You mean is he an Immortal?" Leona smiled in the darkness, "No...he's got something inside him that gives off a pretty strong reading whenever he's near, but it's not the same as with us? I've met unquickened Immortals before and they don't feel like that. Besides...if he really was one of us then he could never have children, and what did all you girls go through all that fighting about an engagement?"

Akane felt mildly irritated and felt compelled to say, "There's more to getting married than just having children..."

"Think so?" Leona replied, "Try saying that when you can't have any kids...ever."

"Ah...oh," Akane felt extremely foolish for her outburst, having forgotten the sensibilities of her guest and wanting to say something to make it up to her but not knowing what words could achieve that end.

"It's just as well," Leona sighed after a moment, "I'm with Erin now, and we can't exactly get each other pregnant. Maybe things will be different someday and we can adopt or something, but...well...it would be nice to have a choice about it."

"I'm sorry," Akane looked down, "I've always called Ranma a baka because he constantly hurts people feelings by saying whatever crosses his mind without thinking, and here I go and do the same thing with you. You must think I'm a pretty awful kind of person..."

"Truth to tell, I'm not sure what I can make of you," Leona admitted, "I don't really think I've even seen the real you until now. I sure as hell didn't like the you that I met in that restaurant..."

"Ah yeah..." Akane said sheepishly, "About that. I'm so used to...certain patterns in things that when I saw you I thought, 'Oh great! He's got another fianc e!' I jumped to conclusions...like always."

"Heh, I could have told you what that always leads to," Leona huffed, "I've done more than my share of leaping without looking, and if I wasn't such a fast healer..."

"Tell me something," Akane inclined her head, "What's it like...I mean...being an Immortal? You say you became one two years ago...?"

"Yeah," Leona glanced down at herself, "Stabbed through the heart and died, but I didn't stay dead, and now you can't even find a scar to show where the knife entered. The bastard who did is long gone, but his handiwork remains. Now I don't age, I can't die, I can't be injured or crippled, I heal back any wound that doesn't involve having my head get chopped off, and I'll be exactly like I am now forever. I could live to be as old as Erin if I play my cards right, long as I can make out as good as she has in staying one head above the psychos who are gonna be out to kill me...just so they can take the quickening power that's inside me. Oh yeah...it's real fun being an Immortal...you should try it yourself."

"Ah, no thanks," Akane made a demurring hand motion, "My life's complicated enough without adding something like that to the mixture."

"Suit yourself," Leona replied, "Mind you, my life was no bed of roses before I hooked up with Erin, and being with her...it's allowed me to see more of the world than I ever dreamed existed. I'm learning a lot now because I finally understand how important it is to learn stuff. Back then...I was just so full of anger and confusion, much of it directed at my parents..."

"What happened to your parents?" Akane asked, "Did they take the news well when they found out you were an Immortal?"

"Never got a chance to find out one way or the other," Leona sighed, "They were going through the motions of a divorce when they both got killed in a car crash. Erin took me in and became my legal guardian before I even graduated. I've been with her over two years now, and...well...life has been pretty exciting, but I still remember what it was like when I was so hurt and angry about everything. I don't really know how to explain what that was like, but...well...I do know one way to express myself..."

"You mean...with music?" Akane asked.

"It's the universal language," Leona started strumming notes on her guitar once again, then her lovely voice filled the night with tones of regret, bitterness and sorrow...

["Close my eyes when I get too sad, I think thoughts that I know are bad,  
Close my eyes and I count to ten, hope it's over when I open them.  
I want the things I had before, like a Star Wars poster on my bedroom door,  
I wish I could count to ten, make everything be wonderful again...

["Hope my mother and I hope my dad, sit around the table while they get so mad,  
I hear them scream, I hear them fight, they say bad words that make me wanna cry,  
I close my eyes when I go to bed, I dream of adventures that will make me smile,  
I feel better when I hear them say that everything will be wonderful some day...

["Promises mean everything when you're little and the world's so big!  
I just don't understand how you can smile with all those tears in your eyes,  
Saying everything is Wonderful now...  
Please don't tell me everything is wonderful now!

["I go to school and I run and play, I tell the kids that it's all okay,  
I have to laugh so my friends don't know that when the bell rings I just don't want to go,  
Go in my room and I close my eyes, like to pretend that I have a new life,  
I don't believe you when you say that everything will be wonderful some day...

["Promises mean everything when you're little and the world is so big-so big!  
I just don't understand how you can smile with all those tears in your eyes,  
Saying everything is Wonderful now...  
I don't wanna hear you tell me everything is wonderful now!

["I don't want to hear you say that I will understand some day-No-No-No!  
I don't want to hear you say we both have gone in a different way-No-No-  
No!  
I don't want to meet your friend, but I just want to start over again-  
I just want my life to be the same, just like it used to be!  
Some days I hate everything, and I hate everything, everyone and everything!  
PLEASE don't tell me everything is wonderful now!  
Please don't tell me everything is wonderful now!  
Please don't tell me everything is wonderful now!  
I don't want to hear you say that everything is wonderful now...  
Please don't tell me everything is wonderful now...  
Everything is wonderful now..."2]

"That's so sad," Akane found that she actually had tears in her eyes as the melody ended, "It's beautiful...but it's sad too..."

"Well, I did tell you that I was a pretty confused kid back then," Leona remarked as she continued strumming her guitar to the strains of another ballad, "Of course now that I know what I want in life things are still pretty confusing. Take Erin for example...she confuses the hell out of me a lot. I love her, but even with all we're shared...it's like I don't really know her at all. I've never known anyone who meant as much to me, but she still tends to get on my nerves whenever she does some wacko thing or other..."

"Ah yeah," Akane said as she heard the other girl start up a new balled, "I sure know what that's like..."

Leona's reply was in song, and this time it had a more upbeat ring to it, for all that the words seemed to hearken to the last song in its tones of bittersweet reflection...

{"Somewhere there's speaking, it's already coming in,  
All of it rising in the back of your mind...  
You never could get it unless you were fed it,  
And now you are here and you don't know why...  
But under skinned knees and skid marks, past the places where you used to learn;  
You howl and listen, listen away for the echoes of Angels who won't return...

["He is everything you want, he is everything you need,  
He is everything inside of you that you wish that you could be He says all the right things at exactly the right time,  
But he means nothing to you and you don't know why...

["You're waiting for someone for you to get over,  
You're waiting for someone to push you away...  
There's always another wound to discover There's always something more you'd wish he'd say...

["He is everything you want, he is everything you need,  
He is everything inside of you that wish you could be!  
He says all he right things at exactly the right time,  
But he means nothing to you and you don't know why...

["But you'll just sit tight and watch it unwind-  
it's only what you're asking for!  
But you'll be just fine with all of your time-  
it's only what you're waiting for!

["Out of the island into the highway, past the places where you might have turned,  
You never did notice but you still hide away the anger of Angels who won't return!]

["She is everything you want, she is everything you need,  
She is everything inside of you that you wish you could be!  
She says all the right things at exactly the right time,  
But she means nothing to you and you don't know why...  
I am everything you want, I am everything you need,  
I am everything inside of you that you wish you could be!  
I say all the right things at exactly the right time,  
But I mean nothing to you and I don't know why...  
Why...don't know why..."3]

"She?"

"Excuse me?" Leona asked.

"You said she right now," Akane pointed out, "Did you mean you...and Erin?"

"Ah..." Leona lowered her guitar and had a sheepish expression, "Did I say that? I wasn't thinking it...I think..."

"Well, you were thinking about Erin," Akane smiled, "So I guess it's only natural that you'd change the words a little to reflect that."

"I guess," Leona replied sheepishly, "Guess maybe I do spend a lot of time thinking about her. It's just...Erin's so much larger than life, and I sometimes wonder what she sees in a mousy old thing like me. She's known some pretty important people, after all, and half her friends are older than Methuselah..."

"You don't seem so ordinary to me," Akane half-smiled.

"Thanks," Leona replied, "But if it wasn't for Erin...well...my life would seem a lot worse off than it is now. She's helped me to find myself in a lot of really important ways, and if I didn't have her to lean on...I don't know what I'd do. To tell you the truth this Immortality stuff isn't all its cracked up to be, and sometimes I feel like it's just the physical me that gets put back together when I stumble. I still feel pretty broken up inside...I mean, not to whine, carp and complain about it 'cause I'm not really all that miserable, but...I just...well..." words finally failed her, so she resorted once again to playing another ballad...

["And if I fall along the way, pick me up and dust me off,  
And if I get too tired to be, be my breath so I can walk.  
And if I need some other loving, you give me more than I can stand;  
When my smile gets old and faded, wait around, I'll smile again!  
Shouldn't be so complicated, just hold me and then...just hold me again!

["Can you help me, I'm bent!  
I'm so scared that I'll never get put back together;  
Keep breaking me in and this is how we will end,  
With you and me...human needs...

["And if I couldn't sleep, could you sleep?  
Could you paint me better off?  
Could you sympathize with my needs?  
I know you think I need a lot!  
I started out clean but I'm jaded,  
Just phoning it in...just breaking my skin-

["Stop bending me, it's never enough 'til I feel all your pieces...  
Start bending me, keep bending me on until I'm completely broken in!

["Shouldn't be so complicated, just touch me and then-  
Well, just touch me again!  
Can you help me, I'm bent!  
I'm so scared that I'll never get put back together;  
Keep breaking me in and this is how we will end,  
With you and me, ending...without understanding...  
Hell, I go there again, can you help me, I'm bent!  
I'm so scared that we will never get put back together,  
Keep breaking me in and this is how we will end,  
With you and me...Bent..."4]

"You really are very good," Akane applauded, "I don't see how you can go wrong with a talent like yours."

"I'm glad you think so," Leona stilled the strings of her guitar then studied the dimly visible features of the other girl and said, "Mind if I ask you something? What happened to you today...after we put down that demon and your boyfriend got hitched to your sister and the other girls? The way you just flipped everybody off...well...it had us all pretty worried..."

"I'm sure," Akane nodded, "I suppose I might as well tell you, if you don't mind answering me a question. Where are Ranma, Nabiki and the others off to now? I mean...if they really are married..."

"You want to look them up?" Leona asked.

"No," Akane shrugged, "I'm just asking."

"They're on their honeymoon, of course," Leona replied, "And if you have to know, it's at that restaurant they call the Nekohanten. That old woman said it would make a better place to celebrate than here in the dojo or in the house. I think Ranma welcomed the chance to get away form his parents for a while, but the way that guy was acting, you'd think he was being dragged to the gallows or something. I can almost feel sorry for him, one guy having to satisfy three women..."

"Must be the Baka's favorite fantasy," Akane grumbled, then paused and said, "Sorry about that...that was reflex."

"You really don't like the way things turned out, huh?" Leona asked, "Way I remember things, you didn't exactly put up a fight when it was over."

"I know," Akane said, "But what was the point? It was already a done deal, and besides...they'd all gone through a whole lot while I was crazy...and...well..."

Leona nodded her head, recalling the event with such vivid detail that it could have just happened and not be an incident several hours in the past when Akane had made her off-handed declaration...

"NANI?" had come a collective gasp from everyone who had been within earshot when Akane had told them to "forget about" Nabiki and the others stealing away her boyfriend. On many previous occasions the youngest Tendo girl had voiced sentiments of a similar or even more vociferous nature, and yet never so calmly and matter-of-factly, as if she had really and sincerely meant it this time rather than merely indulge in her usual patterns of denial.

"Excuse me?" Nabiki had blinked her eyes before taking another hard look at her younger sister, "Did you just tell me to forget about me marrying Ranma?"

"It's not important anymore," Akane had replied with an affable smile, "I don't know why...but...it's like something changed. I don't know why but I don't even feel angry."

"Akane?" Ryoga asked in mild astonishment.

"You're...not angry?" Ranma blinked, "Really?"

"No," Akane actually smiled, "Well...maybe just a little bit hurt, but you're such a pervert, it figures you'd try to keep at least three women happy...you'd need that much just to satisfy you, Ranma."

"Akane-chan?" Kasumi had asked, "Are you feeling well?"

"Never better," Akane rocked on her heels, "It's weird...it's like a fog just got lifted or something...I can't explain it, but I just know I feel a lot better about myself."

"She's gone completely mental," Leona had murmured, unable to believe in such a total turn around in attitude and behavior.

"I wonder," Erin herself mused softly, eyeing the youngest Tendo child in a curious manner.

"Interesting," Cologne had remarked, "Banishing the Oni appears to have had unexpected side effects on our dear Miss Tendo."

"But Akane..." her father had protested, "You know I want you to be happy for your sister, but with all that's been going on of late..."

"Dad," Akane said softly, "Shut up. You've said more than enough for me, trying to make decisions for me, trying to run my life, and now I find out it's all about you and Uncle Saotome trying to avoid having to face some demon from your past? Please!"

"Yer angry about that surely," Erin inclined her head, "Ye feel let down an' betrayed by those who profess t'luv ye?"

"Actually, I'm a lot less upset about it than any of you seem to think," Akane replied, "Don't forget, I never even wanted to be engaged to the Baka in the first place. Oh sure...I was starting to warm up to the idea, but now that I actually can think about it clearly, I realize that being married to Ranma isn't what I want after all."

"It ain't?" Ranma seemed even more confused than ever.

"Get over yourself, Ranma," Akane frowned, "You may think the world revolves around you, but it doesn't. You've been trying to make something work that the both of us know could never work out no matter how hard we tried. You were in love with me once, but lately you just seem to be going through the motions, and if anything you were trying to turn me back into what I was before things got so crazy. You think that's what a relationship is all about? I don't think so."

"But...Akane..." Ukyo hesitated, "You've been jealous over Ranma for as long as I've known you, and Shampoo can back me up on that since she's been around here a lot longer..."

"Aiyaa," Shampoo softly exclaimed, "Akane always very angry girl, always try to keep Airen for herself, pick fights with Shampoo and hit Ranma..."

"That's the old me you're talking about," Akane insisted, "The new me isn't like that, and if you people want Ranma so bad, then you can have him."

"Akane?" Nabiki said, "You mean...you really aren't mad at me for taking him away from you?"

"What are you talking about, Nabiki," Akane asked, "I drove him away from me a long time ago. You think I don't know how much you've been pining away over Ranma when you thought I wasn't looking?"

"What?" Nabiki blinked, "Pining...me?"

"Oh please!" Akane rolled her eyes, "As if it wasn't painfully obvious to everyone. I'm sure Kasumi saw it too, and maybe I wasn't being all that consistent about the way I handled things, but I saw it too, even if I couldn't admit it."

"Fascinating," Cologne remarked, "It would seem that freeing you from the influence of the Oni has partially integrated your consciousness and restored your perceptions to what they were before any of this started."

"I don't know anything about that," Akane turned around and said matter-of-  
factly, "But I do know one thing I've been meaning to get around to, a reckoning of sorts that's long overdue..."

"A reckoning?"

"Yep," Akane smiled, then arched her tones, "Oh...by the way, Ryoga...about P-  
chan..."

"URK!" the shirtless Lost Boy reacted, suddenly QUITE nervous in both stance and expression.

"If you see him around, give him a message from me," Akane looked Ryoga in the eyes and said, "He really shouldn't be wandering lost when there's a girl named Akari who's probably very worried about him. Would you tell him that for me?"

"Urk...ah...sure..." Ryoga swallowed.

"Good," Akane patted him on the chest and added, "And while we're on the subject, I'd like to see Akari and chat with her for a bit. It's been a while since I last said hi, so maybe we can go see her together...and maybe have a few words about P-chan."

"GULP" Ryoga audibly reacted, then lowered his head and said, "A-All right...if...if you think it's for the best..."

"NOW Ryoga," Akane said with some urgency, "I know where you two have been staying."

"Ah...yes...Akane..." the Lost Boy said, then trudged off after the dark haired girl like a condemned prisoner being led to the gallows...

"You really took him off to meet some girl named Akari?" Leona asked.

"I thought it was long overdue that I get things squared off between us," Akane replied, "We'd met before maybe about a dozen different times, but I always liked Akari as a person, and I knew Ryoga-kun was very interested in her. I thought it was only fair that I set her straight about what a naughty little pig he's been for the last two years. I know Ryoga never intentionally meant me any harm, but posing as my cute little pet just to be near to me was pretty dishonorable for him...and for a guy who prides himself on his honor..."

"Just how long have you know about his having this Pig-curse anyway?" Leona asked.

"I didn't know at first, honest," Akane replied, "But gradually, over time, I started to get hints about him being P-chan. For one thing there was the way that Ranma was acting like a jerk all the time, trying to beat up on a cute little pig hardly seemed his style, and then he came into my room trying to expose Ryoga's secret..."

"He came into your room?" Leona interrupted.

"Yeah, the idiot," Akane almost said that with affection, "Ranma must have felt jealous and figured Ryoga was taking advantage of me, or something. Instead of just telling me the truth he tried pouring hot water on Ryoga in the dead of night, and if that wasn't a give-away clue, I don't know what is..."

"But you didn't catch on right away?" Leona asked.

"At the time I was too mad to think straight about it," Akane glanced away, "I kept thinking that Ranma was showing his real colors, that he was the one trying to take advantage of me, that behind that innocent fa ade of cluelessness he was just as bad as Kuno."

"Somehow he doesn't strike me as the poetry type," Leona mused.

"Not that," Akane snorted, "I mean I thought for sure that Ranma was a pervert. I mean...I thought all boys were perverts deep down, but I had thought Ryoga was an exception."

"Then you're not really in love with that other boy?" Leona asked.

"Who, Ryoga?" Akane shrugged, "I like him, but I wouldn't call it love...at least not the way you mean. I care about him, he's always been a trusted friend, and I don't know why I never saw that he was in love with me. Somehow I just...didn't...like I didn't see all those times he changed right in front of me. I just looked away and pretended it didn't happen. I've done that about a lot of things, like when everybody's tried telling me that I can't cook worth a darn. I always mess things up when I try reading a recipe...like I've felt compelled to improvise, to change the ingredients. Maybe that was the Oni working on me, or maybe I've just been too stubborn and willful to admit the truth. The only reason I can tell you these things now is that I'm trying to make a break with my past, to change my ways and start a new leaf...one that doesn't have anything to do with boyfriends or fianc es, and especially no Ranma."

"That's a relief," Leona said, "The way you were acting, I thought you'd just exchanged one form of craziness for another."

"Can't say I blame you," Akane sighed, "By the way, what did happen when I took off with Ryoga?"

"Well," Leona shrugged, "Not much to tell there, other than the fact that there was a lot of talk trying to figure out why you had flip-flopped on the engagement issue..."

There was silence that had fallen over the entire compound until the two teenagers had made their exit, then Leona broke the silence by asking, "What the heck was that all about?"

"T'would seem the young Miss Tendo has experienced a spontaneous cure," Erin remarked, "Nay without precedence, but rather unexpected."

"I'll say," Nabiki blinked her eyes, "Did she just give Ranma to me without a fight? That doesn't sound like the Akane I've known all my life..."

"She sounds more like the Akane that I remember from long ago," Kasumi remarked with a curious intensity, "Almost like she was before...before the death of our mother..."

"Oh my," Nodoka mused, "Could it be that the Oni might have had something to do with her state of mind of late?"

"I have a theory about that," Cologne said gravely, "For some time I have sensed a shadow clouding the thoughts of the youngest Tendo child, and often when she manifested her rage I had flashes of the Oni. I'm just surprised that I didn't see the connection before now."

"O' course," Erin smiled, "It all makes sense now. The Demon wanted her freedom and somehow managed to exude her foul tendrils of thought to the children O' this generation. When Kimiko died she left a void in all yer hearts through which the foul Spriggan could venture. In yer youngest she found a most impressionable sort O' child whose grief could be twisted into unfocused anger, and through this no doubt she plied her hateful arts t' try and prevent a joining 'tween her an' young Squire Saotome."

"You mean that Oni was responsible for her getting angry and jealous all of the time?" Ukyo asked.

"Maybe even cause Akane be molested by evil swordsman," Shampoo suggested, "Maybe she no understand what Demon want, so she call Airen Pervert."

"An astute observation," Cologne nodded, "It all fits a certain pattern...her obsession about sexual perversions, her skittishness regarding her own body, her violent mood swings, her possessive rages bordering on the homicidal...all signs of that dark spirit's evil influence warping the child's nature and insuring a most unhappy union...one little likely to result in a new generation."

"But why do that when it could just maybe make her break the stone and let it out?" Leona wondered, "Wouldn't that be a whole lot less complicated?"

"Ah, but you reckon without the dark heart and mind of the Oni, Child," Cologne reasoned, "It far better suited its vengeful nature to corrupt and destroy the houses of Saotome and Tendo, its tormentors, from within, and what better way to undo the possible reuniting of the families than to turn the principle heirs of both houses against one another?"

"Of course," Soun declared, "It's so diabolically simple and clever..."

The Panda held up a sign that read, "It's almost scary!"

Leona eyed the sign-wielding Panda then leaned in closer to Ranma and said, "Do you ever find that...I dunno...a little weird or something?"

"You think?" Ranma replied, still finding himself within the embrace of Chef and Amazon, "So...that Demon thing was the one driving Akane over the edge and making her act so violent?"

"Tis likely the child would always hae aggressive tendencies and instincts," Erin replied, "She be her mother's daughter after all, an' I see in all three O' ye different aspects that were in the mixture O' Kimiko when she were alive an' single. Perhaps married life tamed her spark a little...but somehow I doubt it."

"Perhaps so," Soun nodded grimly, "Though when she first became pregnant with Akane there was some concern about her health...but she managed to live a few more good years, and I believe my wife took her remaining years more seriously because she realized that they were so precious."

"Mother was sick before she had Akane?" Kasumi asked.

"She had Ovarian cancer," Soun looked down, his lip trembling as he spoke, "It made Akane's birth more complicated, and...at times we thought we were about to lose her...but when Akane was born it was as if our life were finally complete. Kimiko was a different woman for the last seven years that she was with us...for one thing she finally learned how to cook right and keep house..."

"Heaven knows how hard I had to work to teach her those things before she was married," Nodoka added softly, "Why...before I started training her she could barely boil water."

"That sounds familiar," Nabiki mused, "Wonder if Akane's cooking skills will start to improve now? One can only hope for Ryoga's sake."

"I thought Ryoga was going with Akari?" Kasumi replied.

"Not just Akari if I make that look in our sister's eye right," Nabiki responded, "I've got a feeling the poor boy may have his hands full with both women."

"Oboy," Ranma expressed in sympathy to his one-time rival, then caught himself before he could blurt out the words, "Wouldn't want to be in his shoes," realizing as he did that his situation was comparable to that of his sometime rival.

Oh well, he silently acknowledged, at least two out of the three girls now attached to him knew how to cook, then he also silently congratulated himself for also not blurting those words out aloud, ESPECIALLY within Nabiki's hearing!

"So that Demon was the thing keeping your sister acting like a loon," Leona sighed, "Well, looks like everything turned out for the better...so, big guy...what are you gonna do for a Honeymoon now that you're married?"

"Married?" Ranma blinked as a big light in his head went "TILT!", "Honeymoon? Hah?"

"Try nae to worry about it, Laddie," Erin grinned, "Ye'll figure it out, an' I be certain yer lovely lasses will be more'n happy to show ye th'basics."

"You bet we will, Sugar!" Ukyo said with enthusiasm.

"Ranma learn special Amazon techniques for making happy!" Shampoo enthusiastically chirruped.

"And if you need a few pointers," Nabiki added as she flashed an illustrated copy of the Kama Sutra that she produced from seeming nowhere, "I'm sure we can perform some basic katas to help get you started."

"Oh my," Kasumi blinked, wondering how her sister had found that particular manual from among her personal things. Kasumi would have sworn that she had kept it well hidden!

"Hah?" Ranma replied, feeling the press of warm bodies on both sides and basking in the smile Nabiki was paying in his direction.

"Good luck, Guy," Leona snickered, "You're gonna need it."

"Oh my," Nodoka clapped her hands, "Now I have three daughters-in-law...how soon can I expect to have grandchildren?"

"As many as you like, I should think," Cologne noted, "But I do hope that some of them will be raised to appreciate their Amazon heritage."

"I no forget, Great-Grandmother," Shampoo beamed brightly, turning to Erin and adding "Thank you...Shampoo in you debt."

"Yeah, make that a double for me!" Ukyo enthused, "You really are a good friend, Erin-san."

"Tut, Lassie," Erin replied, "I be th' one who owed ye both a debt O' Giri."

"And you have repaid your debts handsomely," Cologne replied, "The honor of my family has been restored thanks to your efforts."

"Children?" Ranma squeaked as the word finally filtered through his mind, then rolled up his eyes and promptly fainted...

Akane could not help chuckling as she heard that, and when she could finally talk again she gasped, "He really did that? The Baka..."

"Yeah," Leona softly laughed, "Some hero."

"Well, I guess that means he really is married to Nabiki and the others," Akane sighed, "Guess I really have lost him forever..."

"You regret that?" Leona asked.

"Of course I do," Akane replied, "You can't go through everything that we went through together without feeling deep ties that can never go away. I betrayed whatever trust he had in me when I started turning abusive. I never was able to say what I actually felt about him...I never had the courage to admit that I had any feelings. I thought if I did it would mean losing everything I was to that mad ride we were on for the last two years. You wouldn't believe what we've been through! Martial arts challenges, lost worlds filled with giant monsters, exotic Princes trying to marry me, heck, there was even one time when Daddy wound up engaging me to some creep from Paris who had a mouth big enough to swallow a whole turkey! You can't survive that much insanity without feeling like there was this tug of destiny that was holding us together. I'm sure Ranma felt it too, and that's why he never could commit to any of the other girls before today. Of course in fairy-tail romances the heroine isn't supported to turn into an ogre..."

"I guess that means you're giving up more than you let on back there," Leona sniffed.

"What's to give up but the illusion?" Akane responded, "Whatever chance there was for us to be married went up in smoke after I nearly killed Ranma a couple of months back. I didn't even realize that I'd done it...I just saw red, like always, and I hit him without waiting for an explanation. Kami-sama...I can still remember the hatred...I wanted him to die, I really wanted it. I never realized until now just how bad I've been behaving."

"But you've changed," Leona said, "I can feel it in your voice. You're not the same as you were this morning, so...what are you going to do with the rest of your life?"

"Honestly...I don't really know," Akane sighed, "Try to put things back together. I suppose I could give Ryoga a chance to make it up to me, and I really do like Akari, so maybe I should look things up on that end."

"Excuse me?" Leona blinked.

"Don't tell me you're shocked," Akane smiled lopsidedly, "I thought you'd understand if anyone could. That's another thing I've wasted a lot of time denying to myself...the fact that I don't feel comfortable around boys. I've always felt closer to women...I just could never quite explain it."

"You mean...you're Gay?" Leona asked.

"I don't think so," Akane replied, "I do feel...a kind of attraction to men...but it's just not the same way I feel around girls. The first time I laid eyes on Ranma, he was in his girl form and I...well...I just felt real nice around her...comfortable like. I never felt that comfortable around Ranma in his male body...and I thought she looked so pretty. I guess maybe HOT is the word I meant to use, but I could never get over the mental hurdle to come right out and say that."

"So...you liked him better as a girl, eh?" Leona mused, "I'll bet he'd find that pretty surprising."

"Considering how I've treated him over the years, I should say so," Akane nodded her head slowly, "And being around him confused the hell out of me. I'd know she was really a guy, but Ranma-chan-or Ranko, as I liked to call her-and yet I couldn't help feeling an attraction. It drove me crazy-well...crazier than I was at the time-having to fight these...disturbing feelings whenever Ranko was around. I couldn't face this about myself, and I hated the thought that people would find out and call me a Pervert. I can't stand it when people talk about me behind my back, and I've tried so hard to convince people that I'm a perfectly normal girl with perfectly normal interests in boys, even if the thought of a boy touching me could sometimes make my skin crawl."

"But not all boys could do that to you?" Akane asked.

"Yes," Akane nodded again, "Ryoga, for one...and this boy I knew in that lost world place I mentioned. These were nice guys who I knew weren't out to hurt me in any way, so I felt...safer being with them than I did around Kuno or the bunch of Jocks who used to attack me every morning. I also used to have this great big crush on Tofu-Sensei...well...I don't wanna go there anymore. The thing is...I wanted to fit in, to be considered a normal girl, but inside I knew that I wasn't...and...I guess I just let it get to me after a while."

"Ah...don't take me wrong for saying this," Leona said, "But you Japanese are way too big on this conformity stuff. You can't pretend you're something you're not...I mean, sure, I like guys too, but ever since Erin became my lover, well...I've kinda, like, expanded my horizons..."

"You're so lucky," Akane sighed, "You Americans can get away with a lot more than we can. Where you come from it's probably no big deal to be...a little different..."

"I wish it was that simple for us," Leona replied, "But I spent most of my high school years in a Catholic school, and I was thought to be a lost sheep by most of the teachers. Hell, I went out of my way to break the rules, and I was a real rebel without a clue. Who knows what I'd have turned out like if not for Erin..."

"I guess she counts as the most significant person in your life," Akane mused, "Other than your parents."

"Yeah, well...I was adopted, so I don't know who they were," Leona sniffed, "But yeah...Erin not only helped me go get a handle on who I am and what I was born to do, but she make me believe in myself. She didn't try to break me or turn me into being something I'm not, and because of her I can stand pretty tall and square my own shoulders..."

And with that she began to play the bars of yet another ballad...

["This ain't a song for the broken hearted-  
It's not a prayer for the faith departed-  
And I ain't gonna be just a face in the crowd,  
Gonna hear my voice when I shout it out loud!

["It's my life-it's now or never, and I ain't gonna live forever!  
I just wanna live when I'm alive-It's my life!  
My heart is like an open highway-like Frankie said, I did it MY way!  
I just wanna live when I'm alive...  
It's-my-life!

["And this is for the ones who stood their ground-  
Tommy and Gina never back down!  
Tomorrow's getting harder, make no mistake!  
Lucky ain't luck, you gotta make your own breaks!

["It's my life-it's now or never!  
And I ain't gonna live forever!  
I just wanna live when I'm alive-it's my life!  
My heart is like an open highway-like Frankie said, I DID IT MY WAY!  
I just wanna live when I'm alive...  
IT'S-MY-LIFE!

["You better stand tall, when you hold your ground Gonna make no breaks and you don't back down!

["It's my life and it's not or never-and I ain't gonna live forever!  
I just wanna live when I'm alive-it's my life!  
My heart is like an open highway-like Frankie said, I did it my way!  
I just wanna live when I'm alive-it's my life!  
And it's now or never-and I'm not gonna live forever!  
I just wanna live when I'm alive...it's my life!  
My heart is like an open highway-like Frankie said, I DID IT MY WAY!  
I just wanna live when I'm alive...  
IT'S-MY-LIFE!"5]

"Now THAT I like!" Akane cheered as she openly applauded.

"Aye," a voice said from the gloom, "I be rather fond O' it meself."

"Erin?" Leona sat up as she stilled the strings with a hand, catching sight of a ghostly pale apparition of white hair in the darkness.

"Who else?" Erin smiled, "Ye be so caught up in yer tale that ye nae caught sight O' me approaching from the house. I've listening to ye two converse an' I be heartily glad to see ye made a complete recovery from your ordeal, Akane-san. Yer father will be please O' this...when he sobers up in the mornin'."

"O'Shea-san?" Akane asked, "Um...about this morning..."

"Think nothing O' it," Erin waved the point dismissively, "I've been talking with yer father and coming to something of a business arrangement, and now I be free to make ye an offer that I hope ye will consider."

"An offer?" Akane asked.

"Back when ye were crazy," Erin smiled, "I offered t'help ye recover yer sanity...now that ye've already regained that, I think a better offer would be to train you while Leona and me are here in Nerima."

"Training...?" Akane gasped.

"In addition to bein' a fair swordsman," Erin replied, "I also be a pretty fair martial artist, an' according to yer Dad, you're been neglecting your training since he stopped being able to coach you. I understand that it be a key reason ye so much resented Squire Ranma, nae t'mention the other girls who always rubbed your nose in the fact that they were much better fighters."

"You're offering to train me?" Akane said with growing excitement, "You don't mind that I...well...acted so badly before...?"

"T'wern't really you, now were it?" Erin reasoned, "An' besides, me Leona could use a good workout, an' I hear yer a fine martial artist in yer own right...used to be able to take on an entire class O' boyos an' all that. I be sure ye can give her the sort O' run for her money that can sharpen her unarmed combat skills up'n practically no time at all."

Up to this point Leona had been wearing a broad smile, but upon hearing this last pronouncement she lost her smile and said a very faint, "Nani?"

"Sure, that'd be great!" Akane cried cheerfully, "Nobody's bothered to train with me in such a long time! Even Ranma would always hold back and never take me serious and everything! I'll be sure to give you both a good workout and you'll see just what I can do, I promise!"

Leona turned a horrified look in the direction of her prospective "sparring partner," and the memory came back of what it had felt like to be punched in the face with a fist that felt more like a sledge hammer, to which she remained (also very faintly), "I'm dead..."

"Besides which," Erin continued, "I'd like t'be checkin' up on that sprightly boyo that used t'be yer iinazuke...just t'make sure things work out the way I hope it will in his Sacred Band marriage. Poor laddie," Erin chuckled, "Too much excitement for 'im in one day. Sure hope the lasses get 'im to bed to initiate his training in the Marital Arts. Got a lot O' catching up to do with the sorry state his father left 'im in that quarter."

"I think I read you," Akane nodded, "I'll bet Ranma has bit off more than the baka can chew having to please Ukyo, Shampoo and my sister...all in one night."

"Definitely be checkin' on the lad's health come th' marrow," Erin replied, "An' now that things hae calmed down a wee bit it be time me'n Leona be getting' on back to where we be stayin'."

"But we'll come back and pay you guys a visit real soon," Leona promised with a chuckle, "I can't wait to hear all the details of how this guy survives until morning."

"Can't you spend the night here...in the dojo?" Akane asked, her tone a bit hopeful though her expression was all but unreadable in the darkness."

"Maybe next time," Erin affirmed, "Ye've got a long way t'go, Akane-san, but ye've taken yer first steps on towards a brighter an' more glorious future."

"A future without my son, it seems," another voice spoke into the gloom, come like a thief in the night."

"Ah," Erin turned to see the figure staggering forward, "Thought ye'd be out 'til mornin' with all the evil brew ye'd been consuming with Tendo-san."

"Phaw," Genma waved the point aside with a beefy hand and replied, "I always could drink Tendo under the table...it's that skinny frame of his, just can't hold his sake. I'm just a little hungover, and with all the noise you've been making it's all I can do get some sleep in...not that I mind being serenaded by a talented lady like that."

"Uh...thanks," Leona replied with an uncertain expression.

"I also wanted to tell you that the Master took off a while ago...said it was another training mission, though he packed enough of his belongings that I'm sure he'll be gone for a week," Genma continued, "Personally, I think it was your presence that scared him off, Erin-san, which was why Tendo and I were celebrating...that and the boy finally settling down and uniting our families."

"Leaving Nodoka and Kasumi the only ones competent an' sensible enough for me t'negotiate with," Erin nodded, "Not that we weren't doing our own share O' celebrating. Just hope your lad be as strong in his constitution as he seems to think he be. Strong as he is, them lasses were lookin' more'n a wee bit starved for affection."

"My son will manage," Genma remarked with typical bravado for all things not directly relating to battle, "After all, he's a Saotome."

"I know," Erin replied as she slipped an arm around Leona's waist and headed for the gate, though not before those nearest to her heard her add the words, "The Gods hae pity on 'im for it..."

Continued.

Comments/Criticisms/Highlander Final Dimensions: shadowmane

Where to go from here? Will there even be another chapter? That all depends on if one occurs to me in the near future, after all, I'm powerful fond of my Immortal team of Erin and Leona, and the tales that can be told about them are legion. In the meantime other writing projects abound, so stick around and have fun indulging yourselves in whatever creation of mine that catches your fancy. Will Ranma survive a night of Honeymoon bliss with three women, will Akane find a new life in the aftermath of their failed engagement, and will Leona survive having Akane for a training partner? Venture your own opinions and write if you want to see this continued...and we will see. In the meantime, always be sure you keep your sword at your side when you're not on holy ground, gentle readers, and don't lose your heads! Be seeing you...later...perhaps in a century or two, or a whole 'nother lifetime...! Be There!

Footnotes on the Musical Ballads recorded here:

1.)-Red Hot Chili Peppers: "CALIFORNICATION"  
2.)-Everclear: "WONDERFUL"  
3.)-Vertical Horizon: "HE IS EVERYTHING"  
4.)-Matchbox Twenty: "BENT"  
5.)-Bon Jovi: "IT'S MY LIFE"

[All written lyrics are the property of the above mentioned groups and whatever companies produce their CDs and are not my property. No way do I intend to violate copyright laws by making a profit at their expense, and I'm broke enough as it is anyway, so don't bother to sue me. And no, I have no connection whatsoever with Napster!]

Jim R Bader 8/29/00

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If you wish to check out my other works, Please check out my Fanfiction webpage at: . or it's mirror site at: . All related chapters of this series can be found there along with my other works. 


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